"Ultimate Journey" by
Robert Monroe
ONLY THOSE, WHO CAN
WITHSTAND GIGANTIC LEVEL OF EMOTIONS, CAN RETURN TO THE SOURCE OF ALL
SUNS, BECAUSE SUCH LEVEL OF EMOTIONS IS CONCENTRATED IN THERE !
EMOTIONS ARE PARTS OF SUN ENERGY
!
"Cosmic Oceanic Feeling of Oneness with the Universe, a Sense of
Unbroken Wholeness, a Sense of Unity with All Life, feeling a Loss of
Boundaries between themselves and others, when our thoughts
are no longer private and you are able to read the thoughts of others." Michael Talbot's "The
Holographic Universe"
ТОЛЬКО ТЕ, КТО
МОЖЕТ ВЫДЕРЖАТЬ ГИГАНСКИЙ УРОВЕНЬ ЭМОЦИЙ, МОЖЕТ ВЕРНУТЬСЯ В ИСТОЧНИК
ВСЕХ СОЛНЦ, ТАК КАК ТАКОЙ УРОВЕНЬ ЭМОЦИЙ СКОНЦЕНТРИРОВАН ИМЕННО ТАМ !
ЭМОЦИИ - ЭТО ЧАСТИ СОЛНЕЧНОЙ ЭНЕРГИИ !
ЧТОБЫ СТАТЬ
ВЫПУСКНИКОМ ПЛАНЕТАРНОЙ ИГРЫ НУЖНО ПРОЖИТЬ НЕ ТОЛЬКО СВОЮ ЖИЗНЬ, НО И
ИМЕТЬ ОПЫТ ВСЕХ ФОРМ ЖИЗНИ НА ЗЕМЛЕ И СТАТЬ ЧЕЛОВЕКОМ С ПЛЮСОМ
(HUMAN+).
"Космическое, Океанское Чувство Единства со Всей Вселенной, Чувство
Нераздельного Целого, Чувство Соединения со Всей Жизнью, Чувство
Исчезновения Границ между собой и другими, когда мысли перестают быть
личными и вы способны читать мысли других !" Майкл Талбот
"Голографическая Вселенная"
OUR
DOUBLE - PLASMIC BODY -
SECOND BODY
Dreaming-Awake is self-hypnosis,
means consciously or subconsciously raise herself to a higher
consciousness level (vibration), without loosing control and to perform
certain tasks." Carlos Castaneda
Description of Higher Self of
Robert Monroe from his book "Ultimate Journey", pp. 191-198 :
"And there they were,
thousands upon thousands of lines, each
glowing with energy, extending outward in many dimensions, from where I
was . . . the I-There of me! (his Higher Self! LM.) Some lines were
bright, some dim, but each
ended in, what seemed, a cluster of radiation . . . another I-There.
How
could I have missed such a connection . . . ?
- You did not miss
it. You merely perceived them in another way. These
are the sum of all the personalities, we have ever been, connecting
with
those, we think of and those, who think of us. The bright ones are
those
associated with you in this lifetime.
My God!
- No, friend. No
god
here, as you think it. Sorry.
So many of them . .
. so many of mine, my connections in this lifetime
. . .
- You understand,
that these are not all restraining influences, by no
means. When we go, all the love connections will either go with us or
will help us on our way. Your own love, that
you have now—she goes with us. You may be sure of
that.
Are all of us here?
- There are some
still locked into one of the belief systems and others,
who will be in and out of being human during the next thousand years or
so, but when you give the word, we shall all be assembled. So
will all
the others, that you saw bonded to us.
When I give the
word . . . for what?
- To go.
Where?
- Wherever you say.
There is no need to worry. You will know.
How will I know?
- You will know,
after
you have made your exploration—your run along, what
you call, the Interstate.
When will I be
doing that?
- As soon, as you
are
clear of this concern about influences. Let us turn
to something else. You were considering the number of physically living
humans, and how many of them have as much or more ability, as you have
to move around without the physical body.
Yes, I was. There
were about six thousand of them.
- Now look at the
influence you could have, if there were six thousand of
you! You could change the world very quickly.
Then why hasn't it
happened? Why haven't we heard about them?
- They keep
themselves quiet and hidden, as you said. We did not expect,
that you would come out into the open, but one in your personality
pattern insisted, that you did.
You thought at one time, that you would
really change the world, but that was not our intention. The others,
who go without the body, simply keep quiet—and exert influence.
But why? What
purpose is served by keeping quiet?
- That is your
emotional personality speaking again, always wanting to do
good. The others know, that they cannot change the system and they
don't wish to. They are content to enjoy themselves in the Earth Life
System and the only influence they exert is to maximize their
experience. They do not want their abilities to be known by anyone.
Will they make the
same Interstate run, as you expect of me?
- They probably
already have. You were slowed down, because of the
influence of those, who knew about you, and what they demanded of you,
as a result. You lost some of your freedom and it took time to get it
back. Now there is one more area left to cover. The Nonhuman
Intelligences.
What do I need to
know about them?
- You should
remember
only one thing. They may seem more intelligent,
than you, but all they have is more experience. They know more about
(M) Field resonances, than you do.
Those, who used to
be human, are the ones, you need to watch for. They
know more about being human, than the others, so they can influence
you, if you're not careful.
But we are confident: you can manage.
And the
others—those, who were not human?
- They are
unpredictable. There are two kinds. There are those, who had
the same origin, as we did, but lived physically elsewhere in the
universe. They know: how to work in time much better, than we
do, but for the most part they have only a curiosity about humans.
What about the
second kind?
- That is for you
to
discover. When you have done so, when you have found
the right one, we shall have a new home. You will search among the
Nonhuman Intelligences, and
you will not be deluded or led astray.
The search. Can you
tell me exactly, what I am looking for?
- Where we go next.
We have been storing up knowledge and experience, and
now we have learned enough here. There is no reason for us to stay.
I see. And that is
why I shall make this run?
- It is. There is
one
thing you should know. Whatever you encounter,
nothing, absolutely nothing, can destroy you. You are (M) Field energy,
regardless of a physical body.
That's comforting.
Perhaps we shall enjoy the journey.
- No, friend. Not
we.
You do this alone. We are your guiding beacon to
help you return. We shall be waiting for you, to show us, where to go.
But . . . what
happens, if I don't come back? Or if I cannot find
anything . . . ?
- There will be
another one of us, at some time.
And what about me?
- You will join us
and wait. But you need not think of that. We have
confidence in you.
I wish, I was as
certain, as you are.
- We can help you
with that. We can show you a sample of the support, you
have here, in our own cluster. Do you wish to see this?
Please . . .
- Thousands of
hands reaching out to touch me . . . eyes staring at
me with joy and hope . . . overwhelming radiance I know as love,
sweeping over me and into every part of my being . . . all of these I
am . . . we are . . . and emotion, from the bittersweet smell of
success to the pain of parting, mixed with fun and laughter, the anger
of ignorance, the blindness of belief without foundation, the beauty,
the sound of singing voices...
- Does that help
you?
It does . . . Is
there more?
- More, than ten
thousand times more. All the other clusters you saw,
that are bonded to us.
Now I think I understand
. . . I wish, I had not lost contact with my
INSPEC friend. He might have come . . . Why are you laughing?
- I thought you
would
need a demonstration. Do you recognize this?
The feeling
is familiar . . . I have been here before—but when?
There are people moving inward, flowing inward . . . there is a
tremendous surge of love and brotherhood, and sisterhood . . . my own
excitement builds . . . It is our retrieval flow, retrieving our own
from outside the Belief System Territories and from the Inner Rings.
But this was the feed to the INSPEC area! I remember! And I was
escorted by my friend . . . My friend? One of you! INSPEC—that was a
poor label.
Tell me, who was
it, that I talked with, who was so patient with me and
knew the answers? Why are you laughing!
- Who knows you
best
of all?
I . . . me? I was
talking with myself? But what about the time factor?
- You were talking
with yourself—who else knew you better?
So that's why the
meetings ended! I ran out of information. And as the INSPEC,
I knew better!
- That was so. The
process served a valuable and necessary function at
that stage in your growth.
It did indeed. But
I don't remember playing the INSPEC role.
- No. You have not
done it yet.
Oh . . . Then I
will do it when . . .
- When you return.
Does that make you feel more confident?
It puts an end to
any fears, I might develop.
- Good. Now, do you
have the sequence clear? Do you remember the visit,
you made in the period ahead?
I do. Past the year
3000, I called it.
- Do you realize,
what was to happen after your visit?
I'm not sure . . .
- That is when all
of
us will leave. All of us, together with many other
I-There clusters, who will go with us.
So that is it. I am
to find out, where and why.
- Correct. As you do not want
to go Home (to KT-95) anymore, you will wait here with us,
after you finish the physical sojourn, you are now involved with. Then
with us you will make the final journey.
So I do complete my
present life?
- Of course.
Remember, when you return, you will have to take on all
those INSPEC meetings with yourself. Now, do you need anything else?
I will contact you,
if I do.
- No, this is the
last meeting, until you return. We have work to do and
so do you. You have our love. What else do you need?
I need nothing
more.
I accepted, what I
had been told. I was assured of my return, although
the question of success was another matter. I had good evidence too,
that I was indestructible, my I-There floating in the (M) Field for
thousands of years. We are made of the same stuff. As for my
assignment, I understood now, that it was beyond mere curiosity. It had
all been carefully planned, even if I did not know, how to identify,
what
I was looking for. I wished, that I could take a friend with me to make
it less lonely. Then I realized, that I wouldn't be alone, that the (M)
Field love radiation would be with me all the time. So here was the new
direction, where the Basic would be found!"
Dedicated
to Nancy Venn Monroe,
Co-founder, The Monroe Institute and the Hundreds of Supporting
Friends, Who Have Provided Assistance and Love, over the Past Thirty
Years in the TMI Pursuit of Obscured Knowns.
Content:
The Variable
The Long, Long Trail
Along the Interstate
Hail and Farewell
Recoup and Regroup
Inside and Outside
Tour Guide
Recall and Review
The Hard Way
Detached Retinue
Turning Inward
Inside the Inside
Fine Tuning
The Sum and the Parts
Long Trail A-Winding
16 The Roadside View
17 More Work in Progress
18 The New Direction
19 Taking Timeout
Glossary
The Monroe Institute -
Research Papers and Reports - Going Home Series
Foreword
Robert
Monroe is a mapmaker. In Ultimate Journey he seeks to chart that area
which lies "over the edge," beyond the limits of the physical world. He
presents us with a map of the "Interstate"—the route that opens to us
when we leave our physical lives, with its entry and exit ramps, its
signposts and its hazards. This he is able to do because he has
traveled the route himself; he writes from knowledge, not from belief.
Monroe's
first book, Journeys out of the Body, was published in 1971. Since
then, according to Dr. Charles Tart, one of the leading experts on
consciousness and human potential, "innumerable people have found
comfort and help in the knowledge that they weren't alone and weren't
crazy just because they had had out-of-body experiences." In that book
and its successor, Far Journeys, Monroe recorded his out-ofbody
experiences over three decades and established a reputation as a
trailblazer in the exploration of the far reaches of human
consciousness. Now in Ultimate Journey he takes theexploration a stage
further—though he would be the last to say that he has reached the
limit. There is one major difference between this book and its
predecessors. Until now, the story has been Monroe's alone; it has been
his own adventures he has described, his own meetings, dialogues,
perils, and discoveries. In Ultimate Journey, he tells how he found the
route—the new direction—traveled it, and uncovered the reason and the
purpose for this pioneering expedition. And, most important, he
includes the reports of others who, through his new teaching program,
have been able to read the map, follow the direction, and fulfill the
same purpose. Those who are not familiar with the out-of-body state
may find in this book echoes, significances, clues, or points of
recognition that may remind them of something that happened, in a
dream perhaps, in that twilight state between sleep and wakefulness, or
in a sudden moment of understanding or insight when everything seems to
fall into place and make sense. Those who are familiar will, in
addition, be aware of the difficulty of translating the experiences
into language that is easily comprehended. All may know that it is
possible for anyone to follow this new direction if belief systems are
set aside and the mind is open and willing. Monroe says that nothing
in this book negates the validity of its two predecessors, "which
represent stages of growth and are accurate according to the Knowns
available through personal experience at the time." His personal
experience while working on his third book, however, took a sad and
unforeseen turn when his wife Nancy was diagnosed with cancer. His
search for the missing Basic was intensified by the knowledge that for
Nancy's sake there was little time to spare. It is good to record,
that he completed his exploration and found both the new direction and
the missing Basic while Nancy was still with him in physical reality,
and that he and others were able to apply the knowledge he gained to
help her in her own ultimate journey.
Ronald Russell Cambridge, England
Chapter
1 - The Variable
Fear is the great barrier to human growth. It is said that when we are
born into this physical universe we bring with us only two fears, of
loud noise and of falling, both engendered by the birth process. As we
grow older we learn more and more fears so that by the time we reach
maturity we—or most of us—are loaded with them. We have grown
physically, but our real growth, the realization of our true potential,
has been sadly impeded. Unknowns create fears. We may fear the darkness
because we don't know what's there. A physical pain may create fear
because we don't know what it may imply. When these Unknowns become
Knowns the fears diminish and disappear and we are able to cope with
whatever confronts us. All of us have enough Unknowns in our lives—and
enough fears. We have no need to look for more. Yet there are times
when we don't have any choice. Here is an example. This is how it was
for me—it is the source for the material that follows. It is generally
believed that as we go through life we don't really change. We just
become more of the same. Barring the usual exceptions that, as we say,
prove the rule, when we look around us as the years go by, this seems
quite valid. On the whole, people don't change, and most of us strongly
resist change. Nevertheless, all our worries and wars are based upon
change. We fear that something will happen, or we fear that it won't;
so we fight to prevent change or to speed up the process. But whatever
we do, change is 100 percent guaranteed. The only question is its rate.
Slow change we interpret as evolution, fast as revolution. Changes are
the epitome of Unknowns—the greatest of fear generators. In my own
case, there seemed to be no choice. I fell, unknowing and
panic-stricken, into the process that engendered the new recognition of
reality—what I call the Different Overview—that I now carry with me.
The change in my life was not simply more of the same. It was something
that hadn't worried me beforehand, because I had no idea that such
things existed. Was this change in my life accidental or evolutionary?
To me, it was revolutionary.
In 1958, without any apparent cause, I began to float out of my
physical body. It was not voluntary; I wasn't attempting any mental
feats. It was not during sleep, so
I couldn't dismiss it as simply a dream. I had full, conscious
awareness of what was happening, which of course only made it worse. I
assumed it was some form of severe hallucination caused by something
dangerous—a brain tumor, a stroke, or impending mental illness. Or
imminent death.
2
The phenomenon continued. I had no control over it. It occurred usually
when I would lie down or relax for rest or preparatory to sleep—not
every time, but several times weekly. I would float up a few feet above
my body before I became aware of what was happening. Terrified, I would
struggle through the air and back into my physical body. I was sure I
was dying. Try as I might, I could not prevent it from recurring.
At the time, I thought I was in reasonably good health with no major
problems or stress. I was fully occupied; I owned several radio
stations and other businesses, had offices on Madison Avenue in New
York, a home in Westchester County, and, not the least, a wife and two
small children.
I was taking no medication, used no drugs, and drank very little
alcohol. I was not particularly involved in any religion, nor was I a
student of philosophies or Eastern disciplines. I was completely
unprepared for such a radical change. It is impossible to describe the
fear and the loneliness that took over during these episodes. There was
no one I could talk with about it, not even my wife in the early days
because I didn't want to alarm her. Strongly attached to Western
culture and science in general, I automatically turned to conventional
medicine and orthodox science for answers. After extensive examinations
and tests, my doctor reassured me that there was no brain tumor or
physiological factor involved. But more he could not tell.
3
Eventually I found the courage to talk to a psychiatrist and a
psychologist, both of whom I knew as friends. One assured me I was not
psychotic—he knew me too well. The other suggested indeterminate years
of study under a guru in India—a concept wholly alien to me. I revealed
to neither of them, nor to anyone else, how extremely frightened I was.
I was a misfit in a culture, of which I thought, I was a part, a
culture,
that I admired and respected. Yet the drive for survival is very
strong. Slowly, very slowly, I learned to control the process. I found,
that it was not necessarily a prelude to dying, that it could be
directed. But it took a full year, before I came to accept the reality
of the out-of-body experience—now familiarly known as OBE. This came
about as the result of some forty carefully validated OBE "trips,"
giving me—and no one else—extensive documentation. With this knowledge
the fear soon receded, to be replaced by something almost as
demanding—curiosity! Still, something had to be done. I needed answers,
and I was sure I
would not find them in an Indian ashram. My thought processes were the
product of Western civilization, for good or ill. Therefore, to provide
systematic help to me and also to gather information related to this
strange "Unknown", I set up a research and development division in the
corporation privately owned by me and my family. This division later
was detached and became eventually what is now The Monroe Institute.
Thus the original purpose was solely to solve my own personal and
urgent problems: to convert my fear-producing Unknowns into Knowns if
at all possible. That meant learning how to control and understand the
out-of-body experience.
4
To begin with, I was the only one, I knew, who needed such help, so the
motive was personal and selfish, not profound, idealistic, or noble. I
offer no apology for this; I was the one, who paid the bills. In a
contemporary view, the OBE is a
state of consciousness, where you perceive yourself, as distinct and
separate from your physical body. This separateness can be two inches
or two thousand miles, or more. You can think, act, and perceive in
this state much, as you do physically, although with some important
exceptions. In the
early stages of OBE activity, you seem to retain the
form of your physical body—head, shoulders, arms, legs, and so on. As
you become more familiar with this other state of being, you may become
less humanoid in shape. It is similar to gelatin, when taken out of the
mold. For a short period it retains the form of the mold; then it
begins to melt around the edges and finally it becomes a liquid or a
blob. When this happens in an OBE, it takes only a thought for you to
become totally human again in shape and form. From this description it
is clear, that this "second body" is extremely plastic. However, it is
very important to know that, whatever the shape, you remain you. That
does not change—except, that you discover, you are more, than you
realized. As to where you go and what you do, there seems to be no
limitation. If there is, we have not found it. In an out-of-body state,
you are no longer bounded by time-space. You can be in it, but not part
of it. You—your nonphysical self—are comfortable in another energy
system. You have a great sense of freedom. Yet you are not totally
free. You are like a balloon or a kite on a tether. At the other end of
the cord—the invisible cord—is your physical body.
5
Early in our investigation, we realized that we live in a culture and
civilization where waking physical consciousness is the most vital of
all qualities. It is not easy to make a case for any state of being
that is different. A little inquiry soon produces any number of
anomalies which cannot be fitted or answered within the confines of
current Knowns or belief systems—bearing in mind that "belief" is a
currently popular label for anything that cannot be fully understood or
identified. We began to work on questions about consciousness in
general. What happens to it when we become unconscious through a hit on
the head, shock, fainting, alcohol or drug overdose, anesthesia, sleep,
or death? Is consciousness akin to a magnetic field produced by an
electromagnet that ceases to exist once the electricity is cut off? If
so, does it get weaker or stronger if we vary the "electrical" current?
If we do this, we are doing it without any awareness of the "how" of
it. How can we control such action, if at all?
It is easy enough to raise these questions, which simply beget more
questions with no trace of an answer. We soon became aware that a huge
information gap exists. We needed some premise that might indicate a
direction to follow. We moved away from seeking materialistic
explanations to look at the other end of the spectrum. What if
consciousness does continue when the current is reduced? Immediately we
began to find examples.
6
The problem is that when out-of-body we have lost consciousness and yet
we haven't, our memory is or is not impaired, some of our physical
senses are working and some are not, and so on. At the least, we don't
have total consciousness as we like to think of it, and therefore we
don't regard this state as valid. One body of thought holds that if you
can't move your physical body, or if it doesn't respond to stimulus,
you're not conscious as we understand the term. Or if you cannot
communicate by current standards you're not conscious. Yet there have
been many comatose human beings who have continued to be conscious—they
simply had not the means to communicate physically. Thus to explain, or
explain away, all of the many physical functions we perform without
conscious awareness, our culture had to invent nonconscious systems.
These are identified as autonomic, subconscious, limbic, and so on,
including sleep. Any activity we cannot willfully control is not within
consciousness. At The Monroe Institute in the 1960s we began not only
historical research into aspects of consciousness but also study of
out-of-body events, mine and others'. We discovered that many OBEs have
been related to the sleep state and thus dismissed as simply
dreams—except that they do not fit the hazy and unreal quality
associated with dreaming. Other spontaneous OBEs have occurred under
anesthesia during surgery, when the patient found himself six or eight
feet above the operating table and later reported accurately what he
heard and saw from this vantage point—a physical impossibility. Events
such as these happen frequently but for the most part are never
publicly reported.
7
Other incidental OBEs occur during what are regarded as unconscious
periods caused by accident or injury. Mostly these are categorized as
freak events and are tucked away in memory as anomalies—or something
that didn't really happen. Our belief systems would not allow it to be
otherwise. Some of the most striking of the spontaneous OBEs are now
often identified as near-death experiences. Again, these occur
frequently, usually during surgery under anesthesia. Most have the
effect of changing completely the belief systems of the patients,
providing them with a genuine Different Overview. They return knowing
that not only are they more than their physical bodies, but that,
without equivocation, they will survive physical death.Our history is
full of references to what we now call out-of-body experiences,
including the language we use. You are "beside yourself," "out of your
mind," you "fall" asleep, wake "up", pass "out." One of the very few
relevant surveys in the past ten years showed that over 25 percent of
our national population recall having at least one spontaneous
out-of-body experience. If you think about it, you may be among that 25
percent. Can you remember having a "flying" dream, with or without an
airplane? Can you remember dreaming of looking for your car among many
others in a parking lot, finding it, and waking up immediately after
doing so? (We often subconsciously look upon our car as an additional
body.) Can you remember having a "falling" dream, where you wake up
instead of hitting "bottom"? This is quite common when reentry into the
physical body is hastened by the ringing of an alarm clock!
8
Until 1970 the whole research effort operated quietly, if not covertly.
After all, I was the head of a conventional business dealing with
conventional people. I was sure that any public revelation of my secret
life activity would bring doubt of my ability to conduct responsible
business affairs. But I could not remain silent forever. With the
publication of my first book, Journeys Out of the Body, our work began
to attract much attention. We were able to select a number of
volunteers as subjects in our laboratory. Most of them were able to
replicate the out-of-body state so familiar to me, using the methods we
had developed. During the 1980s, talks on out-of-body experiences were
given at various colleges and universities, on radio and TV, and even
at the Smithsonian Institution. Three papers were delivered on the
subject at the annual convention of the American Psychiatric
Association, the presentation being sponsored by the University of
Kansas Medical Center and The Monroe Institute. Currently there are
occasional cartoon jokes in magazines based upon the out-of-body state
as real. T-shirts have OBE themes and even Bob Hope had an out-of-body
joke on a TV appearance. The reality of the OBE is slowly becoming
accepted, and the term "OBE" is now part of our language. What are the
Knowns regarding the out-of-body experience?
First, while there is nothing new about realizing, that you are more,
than your physical body, you now have a means of proving it to
yourself. We also believe, that by applying other criteria it can be
proved to the scientific community, and to the rest of humankind. To
date, however, we know of no way to do this except through individual
personal experience, but we do know, that the tools are available to
perform this verification. A controlled out-of-body experience is the
most efficient means we know to gather Knowns to create a Different
Overview. First, and perhaps, most important, among these Knowns is
survival of physical death. If there is a better way than the OBE of
knowing that this takes place—not just hoping, having faith, or
believing, but knowing—we are unaware of it. All of those who become
only mildly proficient in the OBE soon reach this stage of knowing. In
addition, such survival takes place whether we like it or not, and
without any consideration as to what we do or are in physical life. It
makes no difference. Survival of self beyond physical existence is a
natural and automatic process. We wonder how we could ever have become
so limited in our thinking. Next, the greatest barrier to proficiency
in out-of-body experiencing is fear—fear of the unknown and of physical
death. The attachment of our mind-consciousness to the physical
environment is very strong. Virtually all of what we think is expressed
in time-space terms. But now we find ourselves faced with the need to
translate something completely alien into something understandable here
and now. The only way we have learned to ease these fears is to move
into the OBE process one step at a time, in slow motion, as it were.
This permits the novice to absorb and become accustomed to small
changes, and learn to know that such changes are not dangerous or
threatening to physical life. As these changes accumulate, we help the
student to look back continually to complete physical awareness, so
that there is an ongoing, familiar point of reference. Gradually the
basic fears are released.
10
Most important, the mind-consciousness present in the out-of-body state
is significantly different from that in physical wakefulness.
Initially, intellectual and analytical focus do not seem to be present,
at least not in terms we understand. However, the insertion of physical
consciousness changes this. Conversely, the emotional extremes of the
symbolic right brain are often totally absent and are usually more
difficult to activate. (Love in a strict interpretation is not
considered an "emotion" in this context.) In the out-of-body
mind-consciousness, all of what we are shows "up front" and out in the
open, so to speak. There is no sub- or nonconsciousness hidden under
layers of restraint. Thus there cannot be any deceit or deviousness
because all of us is on display. Whatever we are, we radiate the facts.
There is always some carryover from our physical thought and
conditioning, which we eventually release and reject if it gets in the
way. It is perhaps equally important that we learn in the OB state just
how much more we are, than our physical bodies. The answer to exactly
how and why we exist is readily available if we have the desire and
courage to find out. When we search for information we may not like the
answer we receive, but we know we have the correct one.
11
If you want to prove—to yourself and to no one else—that we survive
physical death, you can learn to move into the out-of-body state and
seek out a friend, relative, or someone close to you who has recently
died. To find them, all you need do is tune in on your memory of what
that person was or represented. Several such meetings will be enough.
You will have your proof—not for anyone else, but for you. You will
need to make this contact relatively soon after their passing because
most of them rapidly lose interest in the life they have just
completed. Moving into the out-of-body state is an excellent means of
gathering information. One of the easiest information runs you can make
is checking on the welfare of a loved one. It is also probably the most
simple of OB targets. If you are separated from your spouse or mate
because of a business trip, for example, it's very comforting to home
in on her/him to be sure everything is all right. For example, when one
of our daughters was away at college, I would occasionally drop in
during an OBE to see how she was getting along. However, I made the
mistake of telling her about this on one of her visits home. A year
later, she told me that after this disclosure every night just before
bedtime she would say to the ceiling in her room, "If you're around,
Dad—good night!"
Voyeurism is almost nonexistent in the OB state. There is much more
exciting action available. You can go anywhere in any time, past,
present, or future, via OBEs. You can go directly to any chosen place
and observe what is there in detail and what is going on. At your
target site you can move around the area to observe from different
perspectives. The only problem is that you cannot pick up physical
objects—your hand goes right through them.
12
With this freedom you can follow the route our explorative research at
the Institute has taken. You can go anywhere on Earth, or in it and
through it. You can move outward and play around the moon and the solar
system. It is beautiful and awe-inspiring, but it can become
monotonous. Thus we saw and knew the other side of the moon before the
NASA probes took their pictures. It was the same with Mars, where we
were looking for artifacts such as buildings or structures that might
indicate some form of intelligent life. Some of us even made a number
of runs outside the solar system and usually got lost, in the sense
that we could not establish where we had gone in relation to Earth.
Getting back was no problem. The explorer simply focused on his
physical body. There is no speed-of-light limitation. If there are
intelligent beings in the physical universe, we failed to find them.
Either they were hidden, or more likely we didn't know what to look
for. Of course, our exploration was infinitesimal. Perhaps if we had
investigated the further galaxies we would have met someone out there.
One day maybe one of us will. In the non-physical universe, it was an
entirely different matter. We encountered hundreds, if not thousands,
most of them non-human. Exploration out-of-body is a prime means for
functioning outside the physical Universe. The "Second Body" of the OB
state is certainly not physical. It is part of another energy system,
that comming les with the Earth Life System, but is out of phase with
it. The clue lies in how easy it is to find those, who have left
physical existence. When you look for action in this other energy
system, in the There, the effect is near-instantaneous. The system is
very well populated and you meet some special friends when you become
proficient in OBEs. The highways and byways of out-of-body adventures
and exploration are broad and varied, for the most part beyond ordinary
time-space concepts. We can understand only that portion, which relates
directly to the Earth Life System. We may attempt to report the rest of
it—and it seems limitless —but we have no acceptable or comparable
baseline of knowledge and experience to do this accurately. The problem
lies in trying to understand it and to translate what you find—to bring
it back. Never be surprised when you return to the physical to find
tears running down your cheeks. What has happened is that you have gone
off the edge of the Known map, and have returned with some previous
important Unknowns now converted to Knowns. You may or may not convince
others of this reality. Most do not try; the individual knowledge is
enough. Think how such knowledge—not belief or faith—would affect your
own life pattern; the knowledge that you are indeed more than your
physical body, that you do indeed survive physical death. These two
Unknowns converted to Knowns, with no conditions or contingencies—what
a difference that would make! A Different Overview—a clear way of
perceiving—can make these into personal Knowns. And more, much more. So
unlatch your Security Belief Belt, grab your climbing spurs and perhaps
a machete—and let's hit the high road.
Chapter
2, The Long, Long
Trail
15
Throughout history, labels have been developed for those who won't
leave well enough alone: infidels, mystics, sinners,rebels,
revolutionaries, misfits, neurotics, anarchists, adventurers, traitors,
explorers, visionaries, researchers—add to the list what you will. Any
deviation from the accepted norm engenders risk. All of these
individuals have been for the most part aware of the risk. If they were
not, ignorance was no excuse. If there was a price to be paid in
reaction or effect, they must or should have known about it before they
took action. No sad tears for the wounded or the dead in such cases. I
know this well, and you may discover it for yourself. So it must be
said: the Different Overview you are beginning to consider can be at
most only a belief, until you begin to test it for validity within your
own ongoing experience during your life as an active Human Mind. As
small beliefs convert to Knowns, perhaps larger Different Overview
beliefs will follow the same path—until you are free.
16
From this point
on, the delivery of a personal narrative seems the most convenient and
definitive method of explanation. What to me are Knowns can produce
only beliefs in you unless you have had or are having similar
experiences that demand verification. Let me therefore attempt to tell
it "like it is" for me, allowing you to form your own beliefs which
experience may in time convert to Knowns. In my personal run,
thirty-plus years of out-of-body activity had brought me to a calm
state of satisfaction. A cycle has been completed, or so it seemed. My
own Different Overview was well in place and eminently rewarding. Or it
should have been. I
knew where I came from, how I got here and became a
human, why I hung around, my final departure schedule, and where I
would go when I left. What else could have had any importance? Anything
else was mere detail. And there was my INSPEC friend. It was one thing
to talk with such mind-
consciousness in sessions in a laboratory, as
simply a voice speaking through someone physical, that you knew well.
It
was something quite different to encounter one face to face. Either in
fun or fact, we had chosen the acronym INSPEC (for Intelligent Species)
to identify this energy form, which implied, that we Human Minds were
something less. But this INSPEC was not the same, as those I had
previously met. Over the years I had experienced many nonphysical
meetings, communication and rapport with those, who were obviously very
human, those who still possessed a physical body, and otherwise.
17
This
INSPEC, however, was different. Our
usual meeting place was just past the H - Band Noise. The H - Band
Noise is the peak of uncontrolled thought, that emanates from all
living
forms on Earth, particularly humans. If you consider it as truly all,
even in a current time frame, you get a better idea of the magnitude of
this disorganized, cacophonous mass of messy energy. The amplitude of
each segment of the band is determined by the emotion, involved in the
thought. Yet our civilization does not even recognize, that the H -
Band exists. My impression is, that it contains not only current time
thought patterns, but all, that ever existed. They are continuous and
simultaneous, and it may be, that the older radiation is layered over,
so all one perceives is the current emission. To study it objectively,
if one is so foolhardy, as to want to do so, all one needs do is: move
to that state of disassociation just beyond the last vestiges of any
direct Earth-related Human Mind activity in the nonphysical There. It
appears much like a reflective layer, beyond which the effects diminish
rapidly. Passing through it quickly is advisable, just as one would try
to work through a screaming, angry mob—for that is what it sounds like,
in a multitude of accents and tongues.
Now back to my INSPEC friend. Here is an excerpt from one of our
earlier meetings, when I had phased out of my body and moved to a point
just beyond the H Band.
18
I wonder, if this being understands how strong his or her light is.
Could it be an E.T. (extraterrestrial) after all?
You will become accustomed to the light. You have the same radiation to
us . . . and we are not the extraterrestrials as you mean it.
You read what I am thinking?
That is true. Just as you can with me.
I can?
You are doing it now in part, but only the surface part.
Yes, you are right. It is certainly not words and sounds . . .no air to
vibrate . . . but simply in the mind . . . yes.
What you call the core self does remember.
You know, I do remember . . . I remember you . . . the feel of you . . .
It is good that you do not express fear. We can do much when that
barrier is removed.
Oh, I have a few fears left . . .
But they do not rule your perception. For example, why are you not
filled with fear at this moment?
I don't know. But I'm not afraid. That's true. Right at this moment I
am here, talking with you in a rational way . . .
with you, someone who is very familiar to me . . . a brightly glowing
figure that some people would interpret as a god, an angel, or at the
very least some extraterrestrial.
19
Yet
we are here talking just like two ordinary people . . . except, that we
are not using words!
The difference is the lack of fear.
There is so much potential . . . Who are you actually? Or maybe I
should say, What are you? Now I do have the courage to ask.
It is beyond your experience to understand at this time. But you will
understand, and very soon.
Can we meet again?
All you need do is ask for our help.
You mean meditating? Saying prayers?
The words and rituals are meaningless. It is the thought . . .
the emotion . . . that is the signal. If the proper signal is given, we
are able to help.
Let me be sure of this. You are not the god . . . a god . . .
but perhaps someone from another planet?
No, not from another planet.
Are you the one, or one of those who may have created us . . . the
Earth?
No. We are sorry to disappoint you. But we can give you what we have in
regard to the creative process. Do you desire it?
20
Why, yes. Yes!
This is what we have . . .
I was filled, almost overcome, with a surge of enormous energy,
an immensely powerful vibration of very high frequency.
This I knew as a ROTE, short for Related Organized Thought Energy, a
sort of ball of condensed thought and ideas.
It is so much! I can't understand it all at once . . .
You will, when you can examine it at leisure.
Thank you.
There was a pause before the INSPEC communicated again.
You are uncertain as to your progress, your growth.
I am uncertain, that's true. I think I know my goal, my purpose.
The uncertainty is what lies in between.
What do you perceive as your goal?
Well . . . I guess . . . service to humankind.
That is indeed a noble goal. It is the ever-present desire of your
human self to attain perfection. When you are no longer human, desire
focuses in another direction. But there are other goals.
A desire more important? No, I don't mean that . . . a desire different
from the human experience?
You are doing very well.
I often wonder about that.
21
You will find an answer . . . Now I perceive you need
to return to your physical body.
You do read my mind! I don't know what it is, but I have to go back.
How do we meet again?
All you need do is hold this moment in your awareness, and I will be
here.
Thank you.
The return to the physical was uneventful. The signal had been
generated not by the usual full bladder but by my favorite cat lying on
the pillow beside my head. I was sure I had checked the room but
somehow she must have sneaked in. In my excitement, I wasn't in the
least irritated. After this particular INSPEC encounter, I began to
take another look at
my goal of service to humankind. This had been my target for many
years, to help humans attain peaks of perfection, as physical beings
not
even contemplated by our contemporary culture. To add a goal beyond
this was indeed exciting stuff. My Different Overview was a major
factor in this stimulation. So I took a very hard look. To help someone
else live better while in
physical form is open to serious possibilities, as to motivation. The
implication surfaces, that any such action cannot help, but be or
become
tainted with drives,
22
from what I think of, as the Animal Sub-Self,
brought about by existence in the Earth Life System. This is the very
essence of the process. The allure for Human Minds is near-inescapable.
I realized that the prime fallacy lay in a simple fact. Whatever I did,
whatever I wrote, whatever I said, would have little, if
any effect upon human destiny. It was good to be of service to those
around me, but this was no more, than passing ego-gratification. Two
generations later it would all be forgotten, footprints in the sand,
washed away by the tides of time. The INSPEC was right. There had to be
other, broader goals. My search
for a broad goal that drives every human brought out one that was all
too obvious. The nostalgia, the yearning to go Home. It could be the
physical place where you were born and raised, the house where you
lived, the town, the city, the countryside. This could be no more, than
the homing instinct, that is present with variations in virtually all
animal species. Or it could be the many forms set forth in assorted
religious beliefs. It might well be that much of our scientific
endeavor is inspired unconsciously by such motivation. The rationale
that billions spent on astronomy, space probes, radio telescopes, and
the like will affect our lives constructively in the predictable future
is a very thin premise. The unconscious desire to find Home fits much
better. Eagerly I took what was a Known to me. My memory was very vivid
as to my source. My new goal became to go and be in what I construed as
Home. Twice I had been there for short visits many years ago.
23
All that
I had learned, while being human, might be of immense value, if I
returned. Such information could indeed effect major changes. It was a
joyous concept and I reveled in it. Immediately I wanted to share
this
discovery with my INSPEC friend. Late at night I phased out of my body
and headed for our usual meeting site beyond the H Band. Just out in
the clear, the shining figure was waiting at our contact point. The
INSPEC knew my thoughts instantly: " Your wish is to return Home. Yes,
that is a different goal."
- After this life, I will stay at Home and return to being human for
one last time, some thousand or more years from now. After that, I will
return Home to stay.
- It is good, that you understand the difference between yourself,
visiting Home, and yourself, returning to being Human, as you put it.
Yes. But I'm not sure. About not being human,
I mean. As you remember
more, it will become clear to you. You are being human, when your
fundamental focus remains fixed within
such concepts of consciousness. If you change this fundamental, you are
no longer human.
- I see . . . Thus I stay being Human, awake or asleep, in or out of
body, physically alive or dead, as long, as my reference point is
Human.
24
- That is correct.
- But I retain all of my human memory and experience in whatever state
of being.
- Yes. You have learned much. This experience is of great value, as a
nonhuman. It is one of the basic purposes for your sojourn. You will
draw upon it in many ways nonhuman, but your attention will be in
another direction. The Graduate from the human experience is very
respected elsewhere.
- Does this mean, that in what I remember as Home, I will no longer be
human?
- You will be, as you were before, but the human experience will be
added.
- It comes down to being in the warm and familiar place, where I truly
belong.
- Your desire is very strong.
- Yes.
- You wish to be there again?
- Sometimes I become emotional about it. But I know I haven't completed
this cycle yet, so it will come in time.
- As you are now, time does not exist.
- Is that an inference I can go Home now? For a short visit? I've done
it before, long ago.
- If that is your wish. You desire to do this?
- Yes. For a visit, yes!
25
- You will learn much as a result. Are you ready?
- Yes!
- Stretch your mind to there, what you know Home to be. Then release
from here and you will be there. I will observe and assist if needed.
I thought of Home as strongly, as I could, and released as the INSPEC
told me. There was sensation of movement . . . a sound like the wind
flowing around me. Before me . . . around me . . . the scene came into
view. . . many-hued cloud towers, just as I remember, only they are not
clouds . . . flowing in shades of glowing color, every color I ever
thought of and some I only remember, but can't express . . . let me
just stop in the cloud and watch, feel . . . not seeing, but feeling .
. .and there is the music . . . a thousand instruments, thousands of
voices . . . melody weaving upon melody . . . perfect counterpoint, the
harmonic patterns I know so well. Just stretch out and let the clouds
enfold me, and the music is all around me, inside me . . . a thousand
years is but an instant . . . but an instant . . . so relaxing and
absorbing, just as I remembered it. How great it will be when I return
to stay forever . . . forever . . . yes. . . a little worm intrudes
upon my ecstasy . . . Is something wrong? No, it's not a signal to
return to my body. But what? What's wrong with the clouds? Watch
carefully . . . there, the large bright blue, followed by two smaller
yellow ones . . . It's familiar! Others, and they are familiar too.
26
What? That's exactly the same cloud frame . . . and the others,
they
are all the same! It keeps repeating, over and over again—the same
patterns in a repeating loop! The worm, my analytical worm, gets
larger. The music, check the music . . . it can't be . . . but yes,
it's repeating . . . the same as I felt an hour or an eternity ago . .
. exactly the same. Let me try another spot, another perspective . . .
move to another part of Home . . .Here is good enough . . . this will
make it different. But no . . . it's just the same as it was . . . it's
not different at all ! I'll move far away . . . far away . . . but
still here in my Home . . .There, that ought to do it. No, it's still
the same . . . nothing new, nothing different. The same pattern over
and over, the same clouds, the same music . . . Let me go in deeper . .
.There they are, a bunch of curls, curls of energy playing games.
That's more like it! I was such a curl once . . . let me join in the
game! Round and round . . . up and down . . . in and out . . . round
and round . . . up and down . . . in and out . . . The game is like an
endless loop . . . round and round . . . up and down . . . No more,
that's enough for me, that's enough. . . How about playing a new game?
How about . . . ? Oh, happy with what you've got? Don't want to change?
All right, keep doing what you're doing . . .Where do I go now? Where .
. . ? That's all there is! There isn't any more. But I don't want to
lie around in the same clouds forever, with the same music over and
over . . .
27
I don't want to play the same game over and over . . . How could I have
dreamed of . . . ? There's nothing here for me now . . . nothing at
all. Now I remember . . . this happened to me before. This is why I
left . . . and I can't come back! I don't want to come back! I had
better leave . . . I know how . . . I know how to do it . . .There was
a feeling of movement, with the wind around me again. Then
silence . . . then fading easily into my physical body. I opened my
eyes and looked through the tears. Nothing in the moonlit bedroom had
changed. But I had. I was unable to get to sleep for several hours, too
stimulated, too depressed.
Chapter
3 - Along the Interstate
29
It took me many weeks to adjust to the idea that I
would no longer be able to go Home. I had thought I would be returning
to a hero's welcome, bringing back valuable information from Here to
change and improve There. But it was not to be. I made no attempt to
try to go Home again. I
recognized finally and sadly that this option no longer existed for me.
It became much on the order of a childhood recollection; something to
hold dear as it was, but not to relive. Clearly much ego and
ego-gratification were involved. But one Known did emerge. I knew why I
had left. A further visit with my new INSPEC friend helped greatly.
He—or was it she—or both—was waiting, a familiar bright spot in endless
blackness. The sense of loss will pass. It is not lost, because you
remember.
30
- I don't belong there now. Everything was the same, just as it was.
But I didn't fit. It was as if I tried to put on a coat or glove I had
outgrown. I can't go there and be— I'm too different.
- And that saddened you.
- Yes. More than that. It is as if a part of me no longer exists. I've
thought of it so many times . . . going Home.
- It is the reality of returning, that does not exist. You need to
release the illusion, that you could do so.
- I have. And I think I know what the actual difference was. It was
exactly as I had remembered it. Nothing had changed. I guess I expected
some kind of progress. But what made me face it was the repetition. If
you watched long enough, if you listened long enough, everything
repeated itself. There's no excitement, nothing new.
- That energy pattern . . . you did not learn that from being human.
- No. That is why I left Home, the limiting factor of repetition. There
was no growth, nothing new to learn or experience.
- You learn all the time in living on Earth—change and new learning go
on constantly. But the fact, that I can't go back Home, will take
getting used to. It is not easy to handle.
- Yet you will adjust. Just as you will when you reach a point where
you recognize that you can no longer return to being human.
31
Perhaps it
is better put, that you not only cannot, but
you do not need to do so, when you have outgrown, what you call the
human
coat and glove.
- That will happen? That I won't want to be human? How will I cope with
that?
- When that point approaches, it will be easier, than you can perceive,
as you are now.
- Well . . . if you say so, I believe it to be so.
- You will know instead of merely believing, as you are fond of saying.
- Thank you for your help . . . which is a weak way to put it . . .
- We understand. You are welcome.
The glowing figure began to fade and then winked out. My return to the
physical was without incident. Things for me changed greatly after this
meeting. I became aware of another, wider goal: to grow and evolve
somehow into the awe-inspiring yet warm Being, that I happily called my
INSPEC. With this desire and decision, I accepted the gentle
encouragement, that was being offered. The result was a strange mixture
of peace and excitement, simple and complex at the same time, a form of
knowing and belonging beyond description. This was heightened
exponentially when I was escorted on a short visit to the fringes of
INSPEC space at my request.
32
Although I was able to perceive very little
other than the massive empathy and love, that radiated through me,
there was also the strong impression of many Beings in happy residence.
There was even a flow of Newcomers joining this community, which I felt
as Layered Intelligence-Forming Energy (LIFE). The strange part was,
that it seemed like a new home to me, as if I already knew the
residents. Yet it was more, than knowing. It was as if I were a part of
them and they of me. The combination of excitement and serenity there
left me bemused. Why could there not be some way, that humans living on
Earth could exist in such harmony? At the next meeting, I brought the
question to my INSPEC friend as we drifted beyond the Outer Edge of the
Rings, that make up what I was later to realize were the Belief System
Territories, parts of the (M) Field spectrum adjacent to the Earth Life
System, where many Human Minds reside after completing physical life
experiences. We could perceive the Earth in the center with
semitransparent radiant globes around it, each larger and thinner as
the distance increased. It took some effort to recognize that we were
"seeing" the nonphysical energies in the structure, rather than
electrons and molecules.
- It is interesting, that your civilization knows nothing of this
aspect of the structure, as you put it.
- I wonder if they ever will.
- Not in the completeness that you would wish.
- If they did know this, it might clean up the mess. So much of it
seems without purpose. The pain, the suffering, the violent emotions.
33
- It is very hard to accept that mess, as a design of some sort.
- Perhaps
you will have, what you call a Different Overview when your opportunity
comes.
- My opportunity? You mean I will have a chance to do something about
it?
- Yes . . . you and your friends. It might be helpful to you to visit
the potential of states of being, that are very different from the one
you are experiencing. For example, to visit an era, where human
organization is different and conforms more to the way you believe it
should be.
- I can do this?
- If that is your wish.
- Can you be with me?
- It will be my pleasure. Are you ready?
- If you move slowly, I might be able to learn the technique.
- You already know it. It is the same as the one you used to move to
what you called Home. It is only the destination, that is not a part of
your knowledge.
- You are right. If you lead, I will follow.
34
The Glowing Figure began to move. I stayed close by until suddenly it
started to dwindle. My response was automatic. The Energy Pattern of
the Earth dissolved into blackness, then out of the blackness a
landscape emerged. Just ahead of me, the Glowing INSPEC waited
motionless. We were some thousand feet over a wide valley, which
appeared to be eight to ten miles long and about five miles wide.
Snowcapped peaks surrounded the valley on three sides. Beyond the open
side were forests and fields extending to the horizon. A bright Sun
hung in a blue sky studded with small cumulus clouds. Directly below us
was what appeared to be a large settlement stretching nearly to the
base of the mountains. There was a mass of trees of a variety of shapes
and sizes with variegated foliage in every possible shade of green.
Among the trees was a complex and extensive network of narrow paths.
But there were no houses or buildings, no smoke or smog. The air was
totally clean and clear.
I turned to the INSPEC: "No houses? No buildings?"
- Sleeping quarters are underground, and the places for artisan
activity.
- Where are all the people?
- They are among the trees. Each is performing an individual function.
- How many are there?
- Just over two million, as we understand it.
35
- Two million!
- That is so.
- How many settlements are there like this? It is Our Planet Earth,
isn't it?
- It is indeed and it is the only such place. These are the only humans
in residence.
- The only ones on all of Earth?
- That is correct.
- I won't ask what happened, that brought the numbers down from
billions . . . So this is what we can expect in the Future?
- You are thinking in the wrong direction, my friend.
- What do you mean?
- This is a place of the past, as you express time.
- The past! There is nothing in our history, that remotely resembles
this! It must be very far back.
- It is. Nearly a million of your years.
- The inhabitants . . . are they human? Such as I am?
- Slightly different but definitely human.
- Can we go down?
- We can indeed. That is our purpose.
36
- Will they be able to see us? Can we communicate with them?
- Yes, with no difficulty.
- They won't resent our intrusion?
- On the contrary. They will welcome us.
We drifted down toward the trees and then into an open area about the
size of a football field. It was a park, or perhaps a huge flower
garden, with neat, irregular beds of flowers and plants, none of which
I recognized. Wide, grass-covered walks wound around among the beds in
sweeping curves. I even thought I could feel the grass under my feet.
- You do feel it. Just as you are able to see, in a physical manner.
But you are not physical.
I turned. The glowing figure of the INSPEC was beside me. Walking
rapidly toward us were four people. They seemed about five feet tall,
each with a different tone color of hair and skin. Their hair was
uniform in length, just below their ears.
Their faces and bodies were those of active, athletic thirty year-olds,
but without bulging muscles. Two were men and two were women. It was
easy to tell, because they wore no clothes.
- They have no need for clothes.
- What about keeping warm? Or protection from the weather?
37
- Each has an individual control system for that purpose.
- I don't see anything.
- It's all in the mind, as you would say.
- I gather you have been here before.
- That is so . . . in a manner of speaking.
The four approached and stood before us, smiling happily. They had
beautiful bodies, in perfect condition. I wondered how we could
communicate—what language they used. Could they even see us? One of the
men took a step forward and nodded.
"Yes, we can see you, Robert. And communication is easy. We will use
your English. OK?"
The OK was what got to me. There was something wrong here. How would he
know American slang from the future ?
"We absorbed it from your mind. No problem."
Then I noted, that his lips had not moved, and saw the twinkle in his
eyes. We both laughed—mentally. I had found a new friend, who could
read minds, probably every last bit of what I thought or felt. From
then on, all of the talk was mental—thought transference, you might
call it.
"This is a beautiful place," I began.
"The weather is very pleasant. We stir up a thunderstorm every
afternoon to clean off the leaves and provide water for the plants."
38
"With lightning?"
"Yes, but we direct the intensity and where it will make contact. The
electrical charge is vital to all carbon-based life."
"And the wind . . . do you control the wind too?"
"The wind? Would you like it stronger?"
"No, it's all right . . . it's fine . . ."
He smiled broadly. "You are wondering what we eat."
"You all look well fed and healthy."
"Healthy?"
"No sickness or injuries, and so on."
"You come from a strange world! Do you really have difficulty
maintaining your physical body?"
"That is our major difficulty."
"How sad. Our history has a record of such problems many thousands of
years past."
"No bugs? No viruses? No one is killed or injured?"
"I understand what you are saying. The bugs and viruses work with us,
Robert. There is no conflict. As for being killed . . . we stopped what
you call dying long ago."
Thoughts and questions flooded my mind. One rose to the surface.
"Then you must control your . . . reproduction?"
"Oh yes. And as for the rest of that thought—we still enjoy the ritual!"
"But no children . . . "
"We have many children. Would you like to meet some of them?"
"Yes, I would."
"I will call them."
39
A series of different whistles sounded in my head, like songs of birds,
almost a form of music. Out of the trees came several kinds of animals,
large and small, all bounding up to the four people, who rubbed and
patted them. Some resembled cats, others were reptilian, like small
alligators and large snakes. Others were monkey-like, and still others
could have been deer, but with long manes and tails. A swarm of huge
bees surged out of a tree and made diving, playful swoops past our
group. Overhead, a pair of large, brilliant green birds soared in
circles, looking down at us. A small blue bird dropped down on my
friend's shoulder and chirped in his ear. He turned to me.
"Our children."
"I would like to call my own animals children so easily."
"You will remember the sound, and with practice you can."
"Is all of the Earth like this? The animals, I mean?"
"Only here in the valley. The rest is much what you would expect, from
reading your books. You know of the Food Chain System?"
"I do. So the animals die."
"Yes, in the Natural Order of Events. So do these, our children. A
Balance is achieved and we do not disturb it."
"Then what do you eat? Vegetables?"
"Eat? I will show you."
My friend turned to one of the females in the group, who stepped over
to a garden plot and scooped up, what appeared to be simple black dirt.
She brought a handful back and stood beside us. Suddenly I knew what
was going to happen.
40
"Would you like some of your favorite corn, silver queen, as you call
it?"
I nodded. The girl stared at me intently, then put her other hand
palm-down over the handful of dirt, still holding me steadily in her
gaze. I knew she was reading my mind. After a moment, she lifted her
hand and uncovered a pale-white and perfect miniature ear of corn. She
held it out to me.
"He can't take it," said my friend. "He doesn't have a physical body
with him."
I sensed the girl's laughter as she turned and tossed it to one of the
little brown fawns, who sniffed at it suspiciously.
They do have laughter, I registered, so they must have emotion.
"We have experienced every emotion you can remember, Robert. We
treasure emotion, but it controls us only when we let it."
I felt an outflow of gratitude.
"We thank you for the warm welcome and letting us visit you. It is very
rewarding.
- No conflicts, no anger, no competition . . . "
"We do have competition. But we never get so involved, that we forget
it is a game."
I did not ask about love. There was no need to. The radiation from the
four of them was evidence enough. But there was a tinge of sadness
mixed with excitement.
My friend smiled again. "Your visit is well timed, for we will be
leaving very shortly. We have to adjust to be without our valley and
our children."
"Leaving? Why?"
41
"We received the Signal nearly a hundred years ago. We had waited
several thousand years for it, and it finally came."
"I don't understand."
"It is rather, that you don't remember. You will, when it is time for
you and yours. We have experienced and known all the patterns of change
in our part of this Physical Universe. We have gone to the stars and
back, moving just the way you are doing. We found nothing, that we did
not have here, nothing truly new."
"I think I have it. You know there is more . . ."
"Perhaps that is one way of saying it. Another is . . . curiosity . . .
yes, curiosity."
"Yes! This has happened to me. But are all of you going?"
"Why would we leave anyone behind? Would you leave your hand, or even a
finger?"
"But where will you go?"
"The Signal will guide us."
"What is this Signal? Can you describe it?"
"It is made by arrangement."
"By arrangement with whom? Or what?"
"With one of us who went ahead. They all agreed to send us the special
Signal when it was time for us to follow. One finally did so after
these many years."
"He was . . . you are . . . like an explorer, looking for new worlds to
conquer."
"Not to conquer, Robert. To be in and to understand."
"How do you know where to go?" The questions kept flooding in.
42
"We simply follow the Signal."
"Are you receiving it now?"
"Oh yes. It has been with us continuously since we first perceived it."
"Why don't I perceive it too?"
"I do not know. Perhaps your attunement is different."
"You have waited so long. Why is that?"
"It was necessary to train our animal children to live without us. Now
that we have completed this, we are in the process of saying goodbye to
all of them. We cannot, nor would we take them with us."
I understood, that it was time now for me to leave.
"I am glad that we came. Somehow, I think we shall meet again."
"We shall. I could tell you more . . . but that would, as you might
say, spoil the fun."
I waved farewell, and all four waved back as I began to lift off the
grass. I could not see my INSPEC fellow traveler, but, at least, I knew
the way back. I phased out gradually and dwindled into blackness. Then
the glowing INSPEC figure was beside me.
- You found them interesting, did you not?
- They were much like humans in the Future, that I have met before.
Except that, those were living just outside of Earth, not in it.
- Because of your love of animals, we felt you would sense a kinship.
43
- I did. Now, is there somewhere else we can visit?
- What is your desire?
- Somewhere where there are nonhumans. But intelligent. And
non-physical.
- There are many choices, if they will permit it.
- Permit it? That doesn't sound comfortable . . .
- Some would look upon you as a . . . a pest. Yes, a pest.
- But you have told me I am indestructible! I cannot be harmed!
- That is so.
- I think I need something less serene, a little more exciting. Does
that sound foolish?
- No, not if that is what you desire.
- And this time will you stay with me?
- I am always with you. Follow me closely.
The bright figure began to dwindle rapidly and I was right behind,
using the method I had learned to keep up, and homing in on his energy
field. It could have been an eternity— or only an instant—that period
in the blackness with just the pinpoint of light ahead of me. Then
there was an explosion of bright colors in tiny dots, which formed what
appeared to be several irregular shapes . . . first bright green . . .
then yellow . . . and then I was pulled into one that was Bright
Orange.
44
I waited motionless as the Orange pressed around me, holding me
in a tight grip. I made no attempt to struggle, nor was I afraid. I had
learned much. Suddenly a series of beats pounded into my awareness,
like a succession of electric shocks. They were not severe, but
irritating, demanding. I could only interpret them as a sort of
computerese, a binary code. But what was communicating was a living
organism, of that I was sure. The beats continued, thudding into my
head. I could not read them, so I tried to send my own weak version of
nonverbal communication. I thought of an inner model of our Solar
System, then mentally pushed an arrow emerging from the third Planet
and ending where I was. This produced in response a long succession of
beats—they reminded me of a primitive form of Morse Code, but did not
translate into letters. But as my mind became accustomed to them, a
picture began to form . . . a flaming Sun, with an arrow pointing not
from it, but into it.
Was that where we were now? The beats stopped. Then a short pattern
began and repeated.Was that affirmative—did it mean yes? The pattern
repeated. It seemed a safe assumption. I created and sent a picture of
myself in a physical body, followed by a rising inflection. This
produced a different pattern in reply—negative, I assumed.
"That means no? You have not met my species? Let me show you." I
transmitted a picture of a group of men and women, as best I could.The
response was negative.
"Are you interested in who and what I am?"
45
Negative again.
"But you understand me?"
Positive this time, if I interpreted correctly.
"But I can't understand you. Only yes and no."
Negative.
"Do you want me to understand you?"
Negative.
"Then let me go and I shall move out of your energy."
The beats increased in speed and volume and then faded away. There was,
what seemed, a quick and violent movement —and I was in deep blackness
with my glowing INSPEC
friend beside me.
- You were in communication with, but a small, part of the Whole.
- You mean like a finger?
- That is a good image.
- There is not much personality in a finger.
- But there are some, who do communicate with such entities. I wonder
if I will ever be able to.
- I believe you may, if you so desire.
- I have this problem—curiosity. Tell me, are there any physical
non-humans I can meet, who will communicate with me?
- You are presuming, that I am not of physical matter, and that I am
human.
46
- Somehow I sense you did have a physical body, but not now. You're too
free. You have never said you were once human, but I suspect you were.
For one thing, you have a Sense of Humour. Sly and satirical, but it's
there. Very human stuff.
There was a pause. The INSPEC Glow seemed to flicker momentarily.
- I perceive you need to return to the physical now.
- Yes, I think I had better. Thank you for the guided tour!
- It is my pleasure.
I returned to the physical to empty a full bladder. The signal—my
signal—was all too familiar! How small it is to be human—but how much
fun!
Chapter
4 - Hail and
Fairwell
47
My curiosity was still not satisfied. I was feeling full of myself,
impatient and ready for more new experiences. However, I discovered
that not everything, I asked for, could be granted. A man, who lived
nearby, died—or exited, as I preferred to regard it, —following a heart
attack and his family asked me, if I could locate and contact him. On
my next visit to my INSPEC friend I asked for help with this, but I was
told such access was not possible at this time. A report in the form of
a ROTE was all that could be obtained and I accepted this as
satisfactory in the circumstances. Then a new question came immediately
to mind, which had much to do with my own physical experience in the
Here. I asked the INSPEC, if I could be shown one non-physical,
non-human intelligence, which I could talk with easily. Somewhat to my
surprise, my friend offered to lead me to one and we set off through
the darkness. In what seemed only a moment we flashed into a Space
filled with Stars.
48
Just below us was, what I recognized as, our Moon
and in the near distance was the Huge blue and white marbelized Globe,
the Earth. I looked around. Where was this Super Non-Human
Intelligence? Reading the question, the INSPEC told me to look behind
and above. I was astonished. Just twenty feet above me and stretching
for what
seemed to be miles was a huge, circular, saucershaped object, a typical
"flying saucer", as so often described, but a thousand times
larger. Much too big to credit,—but, as I had that thought,
it shrank instantly to some two hundred feet in diameter. Then a door
in the bottom slid open and a figure . . . a man . . . a very
human-looking man, emerged and walked—yes, walked, across to where I
floated. As he approached, I recognized him. Short, round, and chubby,
dressed with a sort of
shabby gentility and wearing a gray top hat, his nose red and bulbous,
his mouth a leering grin, he was an exact replica of the star of so
many comic movies I had enjoyed in the physical, when I was young—W. C.
Fields! This replica, projection, Hologram—whatever it was—spoke like
Fields as well, with the same intonations and repetitions. He invited
me aboard, and showed me into what appeared as a large, domed room with
pictures on its walls of every comedian I had ever heard of, and many
more of whom I hadn't, together with thousands of scribbled jokes and
cartoons.
He described all this as his cargo. I framed the question in
my mind.
"Cargo? What do you mean, cargo?
49
And," I continued, "you can
drop the
impersonation. I can take you exactly as you are."
"You really mean it, don't you .
. . But I'll keep it, if you don't
mind. It helps me to think like a human. Or would you prefer someone
else? Groucho Marx, perhaps?"
"No, no. Stay as you are. Tell me, what are you doing, hanging around
Earth?"
"My boy, I'm an exporter."
"I see. What do you have, that we need—apart from this spaceship?"
"I must have used the term wrong. I export from here, not to, my
friend."
"What possible thing could we have, that is valuable to you? You're
obviously way ahead of our technology. You use Thought Communication.
We have nothing you could want or need."
He scratched his nose. "Well, sir, it's not easy to get it, but I do,
yes sir, I do. We don't have any, and you can't imagine how valuable
something is, if you don't have any."
"Don't have any what?"
"I've been gathering it for ages. It used to be very rare, but there's
more of it about now."
"You've lost me."
"Sometimes you need to know the civilization to understand it, that's
one of the problems."
"I still don't see . . ."
"You humans have it, and it's very rare and valuable among the rest of
the intelligent species,
50
in what you call the Physical Universe—and
elsewhere. Very rare and valuable, sir. I'm a specialist in collection.
You don't understand, I see! Let me explain."
"Please do."
"It's a one-in-a-million product and you humans have it. A Sense of
Humour! Jokes! Fun! The best tonic there is for overloaded Mind
Systems. It auto-erases the tension and pressure almost every time it's
used!"
"So . . . you cruise around among us looking for the newest and latest
. . . ?"
"Exactly! You humans catch sight of our collection units (UFO's, LM)
every now and then and get the wrong idea. You even make UFO jokes
about us! All we want to do is look and listen—nothing else. Apart from
the odd practical joke—just to keep in training. And now, if you'll
excuse me, sir, I must be on my way."
Suddenly I found myself outside the Spaceship, which was rapidly
diminishing into the far distance. I homed in on my INSPEC friend, who
was waiting for me in the deep darkness. Now I knew, that at least
humans have one Unique Quality.
- You managed that well. But there is another matter, that occupies
your mind. You have a hidden desire, that you are trying to express.
- Yes . . . there is one that I would like to visit. You know what I
mean.
- The most mature and evolved human in physical Earth, living in your
time reference.
51
- That is so. Can it be done?
- Yes, but the result may not be what you expect.
- I wish to try, all the same.
- I shall lead you.
I followed the dwindling curl of light through the darkness, for I
don't know how long. Suddenly I was in a room, a normal sort of room,
sparsely furnished with a few chairs and easy chairs and a table. Two
large windows allowed in rays of sunlight; outside there appeared to be
a stand of tall trees. It could be anywhere on Earth. At a desk on one
side of the room sat a person. I couldn't tell whether it was male or
female; the face and body structure could be either. The face was
almost unlined, the hair light brown and down just around the ears; the
age somewhere between thirty and fifty, as far as I could tell. The
clothing was simple, a white shirt and dark slacks. But it was the
radiation, that stunned me. It was like standing in bright spring
sunlight, that was filled with every human emotion, that ever existed.
It
was almost overwhelming —and yet familiar. It was equally balanced.
One
moment it was male, then I was sure it was female. A true equal—a
He/She. Heshe! The radiation closed off. Heshe—there had to be a name
—looked up. The eyes were bottomless; I could detect no expression or
emission. The control was perfect, yet I could not understand the
reason for the restraint.
52
The lips didn't move, but I heard. I was expecting this now. There was
a warm chuckle in what I understood.
"Heshe? I've never had that name before."
"I meant no disrespect. I didn't know what to call you."
"One name is as good as another. Now, do you really believe I can be of
help to you?"
"I always hoped that you could."
"In what way?"
"To answer a few questions . . ."
"What good would my answers be to you?"
"I . . . I don't know . . ."
"You insist others obtain their own answers. Why should you be
different?"
This struck home. It was as if my bluff had been called.
"You're right. What I'm really interested in is you, not answers to my
questions."
"I am only one of your statistics. One of the onein-
a-million types. Your friend has done well in locating me."
"I perceive you as occidental, yet no one on Earth really believes you
exist. But . . . we have met before . . . just once . . . haven't we?"
"You see? You are answering your own questions."
"Yet . . . you have lived only one physical lifetime. You have not been
recycled, like the rest of us. But . . . how do I know these things?"
"You are reading my mind."
"Only a part of it, and with your permission, I'm sure.
53
One continuous lifetime, for eighteen hundred years! How do you stay .
. . young?"
"I keep changing jobs. That keeps anyone young. Is that a good answer?"
"A great one. What a pleasure to meet you this way!
What is your job now, if it may be called that?"
"You might call me an organizer, or facilitator, whichever you like."
"With your ability, I would think there is much you can do at this very
moment."
"I keep busy."
"What . . . ? No, I can read it . . . you drive an ambulance, you're a
late-night bartender, a psychiatric counselor . . . and you're just on
your way to teach history at the university. And there's more."
"I like people."
"Wait . . . you flew gliders once, at Harris Hill . . . I think I
remember you. That's where it was!"
"Just having a little fun."
"Where do you eat and sleep?"
"I gave those up years ago."
"You must conduct fascinating lectures in history."
"I try to amuse, and confuse, with contradictions."
"Your next job . . . what kind of job will it be?"
"Organizing, naturally. Introducing a Variable, just as you do. Such as
this book, or the mind-altering programs you disseminate—all add a
Variable into the lives of those, who encounter them.
54
Now, instead of
all the questions, why don't you read, what needs organizing and the
goals to be achieved?
I can give you what you call a ROTE about that, about a plan, that
doesn't involve communism or socialism, capitalism or dictatorship."
"They say it can't be done."
"That is what makes it worth the effort. It needs a unified worldwide
human endeavor. This will happen through recognized necessity, not
through religions, race, or political beliefs, or force of arms."
"Necessity is severe stuff. The world would have to be in rough shape."
"That is the reason for waiting. The time will come."
"But worldwide, humans have never agreed on anything."
There was a sudden surge of energy, similar to what I had felt
previously. As it faded, I knew the ROTE was in place, ready to be
unrolled when the time was right. I had one more question for Heshe.
"When you have time, what about organizing the energy where we work? We
need it."
"You do not really need it, but I will do my best."
"Will you be in physical form?"
"Certainly. But you will not recognize me."
"You know I will try."
"Of course, Ashaneen. And I will be ready for you. You cannot find me
again unless I agree. And now I am due at the university."
"Thank you so very much. Will I see you again soon?"
"No. Not for a while."
55
Heshe, the Organizer, turned and left without a backward look.
Reluctantly I searched for my INSPEC friend, but I could not obtain a
fix on any radiation. I was aware it was time to return to the
physical, which I accomplished with no trouble. Once there, I sat up,
stretched my arms—and suddenly realized I had been given a clue. Heshe
had called me Ashaneen. Or was it a clever misdirection, just for the
fun of it? Now I look carefully at every stranger, who comes to visit
us. Perhaps I should have made a bet! After this experience, I knew,
I
needed good, solid information more, than ever.
Several nights later, I focused again on my INSPEC contact point and
used the customary technique. The brightly glowing figure was
motionless as I approached, but I could feel the radiation, now
familiar and comfortable, that had so overwhelmed me when we first met.
I remembered my feeling of awe, and how I had nearly prostrated myself
in obeisance that first time.
- But you did not. Instead, we shook hands.
- So we did. I did not know what else to do.
- You are doing well now with your tuning process. The vibrational
adjustment is no longer needed. You understand me clearly and your
thoughts are crisp.
56
- And I'm finally able to handle your bright light without shrinking.
That is interesting. To me, you have the same radiation. The mind
reading, your reading my thoughts. That took getting used to.
- You read my thoughts as I read yours.
- Then you perceive my preoccupation with our world changes.
- Certainly. However, it is, as you might put it, not our department.
- But how do I address these events? My own system demands an
explanation, if not understanding.
- You have begun to find your answers. Although it will seem difficult,
the rewards will be great.
- You evidently know more about this, than I can gather from you. And
for some reason you cannot or will not tell me. Why?
- There is indeed a reason. In your terms, what we relate becomes only
a belief to you. Instead, it is crucial, that you know what you seek.
We cannot provide such knowing.
- You mean I have to experience it, whatever it is, and reach my own
knowing.
- That is correct.
57
- But you do have knowledge of all I am encountering—and will encounter?
- Up to a point. Beyond that point, the information is not available to
us. Soon the reason will become clear to you.
- I assumed you knew all of it. I was wrong. Because you are seeking
other knowledge, your path is changing. You will be moving in a new
direction. We will no longer be able to meet you as we are doing now.
- What . . . what do you mean?
- That which you desire can only be reached in another form. You are
well prepared for it.
- But . . . I don't understand . . . Have I done something wrong . . .
incorrectly?
- It is the opposite. This coat and this glove, as you put it, will no
longer fit that, which you need.
- Do you mean I have outgrown you? That is impossible!
- We shall always be with you. That will not change. But you will alter
your polarities. Such communication as this will no longer be needed.
- Alter my polarities? But I don't know how to do that!
- You have done it already. Your return from what you identified as
Home was performed solely by you.
58
You learned as you repolarized to
achieve the change. You did remember. You have been using it.
- You mean . . . that method of moving out of and back to the physical?
As if in slow motion? What I call a quick switch?
- That is correct. And there is more. There is also a Basic, an
essential knowledge, as you would describe it, that you have yet to
discover and explore. We wish you well on your journey.
- But . . . we will meet again?
- Yes. But not as we are at this point.
- I . . . I don't know what to say . . . to think . . .
- Nothing need be said or thought.
The glowing light winked out. I waited alone in the deep blackness for
an eternity before, sad and confused, deciding to return. The feeling
of loss was overwhelming. And . . . a missing Basic? A new direction?
But in my loneliness, there was no place to look.
Chapter
5 - Recoup
and Regroup
59
At first, I found it impossible to get over the loss of my INSPEC
friend. I tried many times, in desperation, to meet again at our
contact point, but it was empty. There was simply nothing, not even a
whisper of energy radiation. The feeling of abandonment and lack of
direction was overwhelming. It was difficult to keep the resultant
depression from permeating my daily life, but eventually I managed more
or less to succeed. With the INSPEC connection seemingly dissolved,
my goal of becoming a member of that species dimmed. But it was
certainly not forgotten. Gradually I restored balance as everyday
questions demanded answers. And, as I knew of no one, who could help
me, I kept the problem to myself. I was supposed to be taking a "new
direction," but I had no idea or clue as to what that meant. Linked to
this was the question: what was the Basic I had missed? However, there
was one item I was sure of: whatever the direction, it was an integral
part of a learning process whether I liked it or not. I turned again to
the Basic. What could it be?
60
Something, I realized, was missing from my
own Different Overview. The only approach I could think of was to go
back to Basics in an attempt to discover what the missing one was. I
had no choice. What was needed was a solid baseline of well-tested
"knowing" before I could venture into the unknown areas, where I hoped
to uncover the missing Basic. To begin with, I needed to establish a
first priority—a clear understanding of the here and now, of physical
life just as it is without philosophical and emotional discoloration.
This would make a firm foundation. So with all this in mind, I settled
down to put my thoughts in order.
The
Earth Life System
When carbon-based life began to appear and expand into various forms,
every form had a prime directive: survive. In detail, this meant
physical survival in a highly organized and balanced system of
reciprocity and symbiosis. Survival of the individual unit guaranteed
survival of the species. At another level, the Earth itself received a
similar instruction, which throws a new light on phenomena such as wind
and ocean currents, earthquakes and volcanoes. Thus mother Earth meets
many of the criteria for an existent lifeform. This implies a
mind-consciousness far different from that of the dominant carbon-based
species, which had not—and still has not—become aware of this facet of
the system. Survival was and is the first law of the system. In order
to survive, each life-form needed to absorb its own daily quota of
nutrients.
61
Those, that for whatever reason were unable to do this, either mutated
or became extinct. As the elementary life-forms expanded into various
species, a pattern emerged. The bigger, faster forms found the slower,
smaller, or stationary forms good eating. In response, the smaller
forms learned to move faster, to reproduce more frequently and
copiously, or become discarded in the scheme of things. Conversely, the
slower big forms found smaller, but faster forms emerging with sharp
teeth and the ability to act in concert. In reality, no life-form was
absolutely safe from others. Danger, crisis, stress, and death became
the general pattern. Fear of individual non-survival, as danger
manifested itself minute by minute, triggered action—fight or flight—in
the typical Earth Life System participant. And, as the whole pattern
and process expanded, a balance emerged, a Balance, which we now know
as the Food Chain. The Earth Life System was and still is an
exquisitely self-adjusting, autotuning, self-regenerating organization
of Energy. The more we investigate the interactive symbiotic
relationships contained therein, the more fascinating and complex they
become. The entire structure is one of polarities, yet each part is
interconnected. Looking again at the Earth Life System, we see, that
the underlying competition theme seems to be a product of the command
to survive. Each and every living unit competes for the basics of
physical survival: food, water, oxygen, warmth, and sunlight. Often
this translates into living space, on and in the ground, in the water,
in the air. We have various names for this: territorial imperative,
room, home, lair, den, hunting preserve, personal property, real
estate, cities, nations.
62
Lifeforms fight for these, and die for them.
Set against this is the delicate assignment of living space on the
basis of capability. Each species can survive only in its appropriate
environment. In water and air, the system remained in fair balance with
the food chain operating efficiently, often to the point where changes
became no more than a small shift or tune-up. On land, however, the
balance was harder to sustain. Hence the variety of life-forms evolved
more rapidly, with impressive ingenuity being used to solve the
problems of replication and survival. Now my baseline, where I am
operating from at this time, included the following points.
1. On entry into the Earth Life System, each life-form is imprinted,
probably through DNA, with a prime directive: survive! This is the
underlying drive behind every action, taken by the participants. The
goal is survival of the species, expressed first as survival of the
individual unit. This directive is geared specifically and limited to
physical existence, with no other implications. Success equals physical
survival. Failure equals nonsurvival or physical nonexistence—death.
Fear equals the possibility of nonsurvival.
2. The Earth Life System is impersonal in that each life-form competes
with all others for life-maintaining nutrients. This competition takes
place both between species and within the species itself. Cooperation
among and within species is standard operating procedure;
63
the system
often forces cooperation, as a necessity for survival. The whole is a
system of predation (food
chain, LM).
3. Any awareness, not related to physical survival, is denigrated. Any
emotion expressed is an aberration (deviation from expected course), as
it does not relate to the prime survival directive. Fear is not treated
as an emotion.
4. The basic pattern of the system is change. Stasis is entropy.
Entropy is death. Thus imbalance is constant, which creates a steady
adaptive response at all levels. Polarization or differential is an
integral force at work throughout the system.
For our Different Overview, the Earth Life System is seen as a Food
Chain predator system, although it is rarely accepted as such. It may
appear chaotic and complex, but it is organized and operates under a
few simple rules:
Grow and exist as long, as you can.
Get what you need to exist.
Maintain your species by reproducing.
There are no limitations or conditions in applying these rules.
Strength, speed, deception, sharp sensory awareness and response, all
are great assets. Symbiosis and parasitic patterns are highly
acceptable. Honor, ethics, empathy, and the like are nonexistent. Every
participant is a predator and the process cannot be altered or changed
as long, as the Earth Life System exists.
64
Survival is difficult if not impossible without predatory action.
The
Aliens
Amid the smooth-running, efficient process of the Earth Life System, an
unusual spark appeared in one life-form. It could have happened to any
one of thousands of other species, but why it happened to this one, no
one as yet knows. It resulted not in a new design, but in a
modification of the old. Thus all of the original Earth Life System
patterns remained strong and only partly under control in this new
unit. To make this mutation endure, it would have had to occur in more
than a single instance, and in various locations. Evidence uncovered by
archaeologists and anthropologists reveal that, in the context of time
since the system came into being, it occurred nearly simultaneously in
different areas. This newly modified species found it difficult to
survive in the early stages. Its design forced it to develop its own
unique methods. It was comparatively hairless, except on its head,
which meant it had to take special action to get protection from cold,
heat, and the bites and claws of others. It had neither fangs nor
claws, which was a major disadvantage in self-protection and aggressive
food gathering. It had no tail, which meant it could not climb trees to
escape attack and,more important, it lacked this means of expressing
emotion. Two legs instead of four brought unbalance, ungainliness, and
a vertical spinal column, that was originally designed to be horizontal.
65
Finally, it possessed an addition to its animal brain, somewhat
resembling a tumor, that really made the difference. Other animals were
bigger, faster, and stronger, could climb better, swim naturally, and
withstand the elements much more comfortably. It took many generations
for the newcomers to figure out why and how, with this awkward and
inefficient physical body, they managed to survive. Gradually the
realization came that they were different from all other animals.
Hundreds of thousands more years passed before they became aware—or
some of them did—that they were indeed more, than just another animal.
But some still regard their species as no more, than intelligent
animals. This new factor in the Earth Life System proved disruptive and
disturbing. It had the same drives, motives, and limitations of other
life-forms, plus restrictions in body size and capability.
Yet in a
relatively short time it came to dominate all others. The only area
that stayed resistant was Earth energy itself. The basic patterns of
land, air, water, and fire remained, for the most part, uncontrolled
and unchanged. The conquest had a significant and vital price. By
devoting virtually all of its energies into the Earth Life System, the
new species disregarded or discounted any direct knowledge of what
might lie beyond. So it became heavily locked into the reality of the
Earth Life System concept. But in direct conflict with this massive
accumulation of and preoccupation with earthly knowledge, was the most
essential characteristic of the species—a mind-consciousness foreign to
the system itself.
66
It was this developing mind, that provided the means to overwhelm all
other species, that continued to take the original "survival command"
to extremities and absurdities totally inconsistent with and beyond
what could even remotely be construed as need. At some stage the new
species gave itself the label of Human: Human "Beings." Homo sapians.
From early days, the Human Mind
learned much from its heritage. It
found the animal herd instinct for cooperation highly workable. It
adopted the mating concept, pulled from animals, who protect their
young until they can take care of themselves. It took over the team
action in hunting. Organized cooperation enabled it to compete
successfully with other animals. So the species developed into the
greatest predators the Earth had ever known and made the process an art
and a science, and even a sport. The animal concept of leadership was
recognized early. At first the strongest took charge; then the
qualities of cunning, intelligence, mental ability were added. The
leader had the first choice of the females, the caves, the best part of
the kill; so competition turned inward for who got the job.
Intraspecies predation became the norm, as in the animal pack or herd.
Throughout history, whenever humans organized into groups of any
significant size, the concept of a god-being emerged to become a
prominent factor. One simple explanation as to why this occurred is
that when the Human Mind moves into adulthood, it no longer has
parental
figures to lean upon, blame, provide help, or set the rules.
67
So it conjures up suitable replacements. The need for a god or gods,
therefore, may have simple, rational origins. As children, we grow up
under the authority of a local father and mother, the immediate
representation of the power and the glory that created us. When we
ourselves become adults and parents, we look for or fantasize a bigger
Father or Mother to assume this role. The god-being concept is a
convenient way to explain the unknown and to relieve the human being
from various unwanted responsibilities. The price, however, is to give
up large areas of authority. Some developing human egos that maintain
that no one or nothing is greater than I am find this difficult to
accept. To clear up and put Unknowns into the Known category, the Human
Mind also moved in another direction. It took direct, repeatable
experiences and, using the rule of cause and effect, turned them into
Knowns which it passed down from father to son, mother to daughter,
then from the spoken to the written word, and eventually into what
became known as schools. Only relatively recently were crude and
simplistic Known-seeking processes established and given a label:
science. With the passing of time, the new dominant
species
developed the predator-driven process far beyond the simple
kill-for-food fundamental. It set up its own rules and laws, which were
often in conflict with the Earth Life System, lear was still the major
tool of the trade, with greed, ego, sexuality, and other such being
important components.
68
Yet despite the distortion and discoloration, the alien thinking seeped
through. Again and again, the alien Human Mind began to express and
demonstrate elements completely incompatible with the Earth Life
System. These were: first, concern and empathy as to other members of
the species; second, concern and empathy as to members of other
species; third, a growing curiosity and uncomfortable suspicion as to
the limitations apparently imposed on all participants in the system.
History and philosophy are full of curiosity seekers and suspicious
Human Minds. There has always been, as there is today, a very thin
layer of Human Minds who have the time and the energy to sit back and
think. They have moved past the immediate need for survival effort.
How many are there? One in a thousand? One in ten thousand? In one
hundred thousand? Instead of planning and plotting how to exploit their
fellow species or to pull riches from the earth, these curious and
suspicious Human Minds sought for patterns beyond the Earth Life System
in themselves and in others. They found enough to strike responsive
chords in their own being, and they passed along what they found. The
message was that human beings are more than mere animals living and
dying in the Earth Life System. Yet, to date, little has been achieved
as a result, beyond such conceptions as hope, faith, guilt, simple
belief, and a poorly defined collection of hints and suggestions under
the general heading of love. So the species as a whole remains
unfulfilled and restless. This, then, is the Earth Life System where we
are now, and the state of Human Minds.
69
These are the Knowns, and this is where we begin, according to our
current scientific overview. But . . . the missing Basic? Even as the
light increased, I still did not recognize it !
Chapter
6 - Inside
and Outside
71
So . . . Where is the missing Basic? And what is the new direction?
Both seem well hidden. Perhaps it would help in the search if we first
find out and pin down what we really are. As Human Minds, we are what
we think. We also are what others think. Most of this has little to do
with our physical bodies when we go below the surface. To deal with
this more closely, let us create a model of the Human Mind as it is and
operates in practice—a pragmatic model, if you like. Imagine it as
structured in layers, something like an Onion, and let us work from
"in" to "out."
Core
Self
This is the intrinsic, original Human Mind. Starting from this Inner
Core, We are the Essence of the Sum of our experiences, without
limitation. The Inner Core is composed of the following:
72
what we have lived and consciously thought to date;
the emotions we have experienced;
the love we have expressed and experienced;
the dreams we have experienced, whether we remember them or not;
the pains and pleasures;
the daydreams, wishes, and hopes;
all of the above during our nonphysical activity (sleep, etc.);
all the above during any and all previous life activity;
unidentified elements.
Animal
Sub-Self
This is the layer or element, that is most difficult to control. All of
the expressions of the Human Mind route through here and receive data
in the Earth Life System through here as well. This is where the
filtering, discoloration, and contamination take place. The problem is,
that we think we need to rely on it or we cannot remain physically
human. Physiologically, it comprises a cluster consisting of the
mammalian brain, the reptilian brain, the limbic system. Its signals
taint
almost every facet of human life; almost, but not all.
Conscious
Mind
The next layer can be identified as what you think you are, which is
entirely different from knowing, what you are. The reason is, that only
a part of the Inner Core is available to the conscious you;
73
hence there
is much distortion, as expression has to pass through the Animal
Sub-Self. The conscious mind may be wholly accurate; but in some areas
local concepts and customs give an opposite interpretation from that of
your Core Self. Although much of this layer is deliberately hidden from
others, a considerable part is expressed in our Outer Self. Because it
is so strong, we have no choice in this. This layer is further
complicated by belief systems; for many of us the complexity becomes a
maze. It is no surprise, that most don't find a clear way out.
Human
Mind External
The next outward layer is what we think others think of us. This is a
Grand Mixture, because part of it is intuitive—nonverbal
communication—which gets confused with what our sensory and analytical
perceptions tell us. This layer is in a constant state of flux,
changing constantly with new experience and new perception. In this
section, which is controlled heavily by cultural context, we develop
artificial and synthetic drives and motivations which probably lead to
most mental and physical dysfunction. Attempting to keep up, or leading
a totally reactive existence—which is what many people do—can, if you
allow this lifestyle to take over, lead to a veritable Hell on Earth.
Human
Mind Role
74
Moving outward, you have the skin: what you want others to think of
you. This is usually fairly simple. Mostly it is set by the
acceptability and needs of the World around you, superimposed,
hopefully, with Waves and Pulses, thrusting out from Your Inner Core.
The presentation of Self is careful and usually covered with a sheen of
deception. In hard cases, no sign of the inner layers ever appears,
even under great stress. Such cases die with their false faces on,
grimly and stoically.
Human
Mind Radiation
The Outermost Layer, much larger, than you might expect, is composed of
Others' thoughts of you (in forms of connecting white threads/fibers!
LM). Consider yourself as existing wherever and whenever any other
person or Being thinks of you, even only occasionally. You may get some
idea of the magnitude by recalling all of those you think of, even only
occasionally. Add (as just a belief at this point) all of those, who
still think of you, but who no longer inhabit a physical body—who are
now "somewhere else"—plus those, who know you from any other existence,
whatever and wherever it may be or have been. You would be astounded at
how big and how much you are. Very little of this Radiation of You, as
perceived by others, is aware of the content of your Inner Core Self.
The disguise and filtration are in the way. But a problem does lie in
our deep concern as to what others think of us.
75
So much for this model
of the Human Mind. Now it might seem, that we
can sharpen our Different Overview greatly, if we focus solely on the
signs of the Core Self as they make their way through the many layers
of what we are. But we have to beware of imitations; there are those
dedicated to the Earth Life System, who can produce a mass of simulated
Core Self so cleverly done, that it conceals the real Earth Life System
action and motivation. It is easy to be deceived. It may help to
accept, as a belief to be converted into a Known, that we, as Human
Mind-Consciousness, have both an individual and a species purpose, or
purposes, for being in the Earth Life System, which is not usually an
understood part of our physical waking Awareness. Conflict arises when
the Human Mind demands an action and the Earth Life System self has
trouble handling it. There is a growing suspicion, that much of our
mental and physical dysfunction is the result of this conflict. The
least of the conflict is external; most lies in the habituation and
motivation struggle within the Human Mind. Now here are a few of the
common signs of the Core Self, that may emerge through the Layers.
These are strictly non-Earth Life System and non-animal, and are not
listed in order of importance.
Emotion
76
Any expression of emotion: sadness, joy, anger, grief, ecstasy, hate,
exaltation, depression, and so on, all subjective and spontaneous. The
key is to experience and subsequently to learn to control and direct
them, as desired. In the Earth Life System there is no emotion beyond
survival responses, such as protection of young—responses, which are
purely aggressive or defensive in motivation. The nearest simulations
include possessiveness, dominance, jealousy, pride, etc. Empathy
Appreciation and even understanding without necessarily having any
related personal memory or experience to draw upon. Empathy is a
recognition of oneness beyond physical species. It is also a reflection
of the knowledge, that such experience is essential to the individual's
learning process; therefore nothing can or should be done to attempt to
change the problems, others must face. Sympathy and compassion are
specific versions, that are colored by emotion to varying degrees. The
Earth Life System has no knowledge or understanding of this area. The
closest approximation may be herd or pack instinct, which is strictly
survival-based. It is possible, that current dolphin investigations may
have some relevance here.
Soft
Smile
77
A direct information flow from
the Core Self level. It is a form of
what can be called nonverbal communication—multiple and total
simultaneous transmission/reception that cannot be expressed in words.
The facial expression is an autonomic response: "Got it, loud and
clear!" The Earth Life System has nothing comparable. The closest may
be
relationships developed between Human Minds and pet animals—a hand lick
or a purr. But simulations are all over the place!
Big Grin
Another thrust direct from the
Core Self. This radiation
cannot be translated into words or graphics. "Joy" and "fun" are too
mundane. There are many imitations and because it is so disarming the
indicator is widely used to manipulate. Go past the indicator to the
radiation itself. Again, there is nothing comparable in the Earth Life
System. In this framework, anything similar is a warning or prelude to
predation.
Beauty
Beholding
This is clean Core Self. It is
pure appreciation of the inspiration and
creativity of not only Earth Life System constructs but also of Human
Mind patterns, from soaring bridges and buildings to a cappella choirs
and Human Mind performance.
78
It is an information/experience-gathering
process that your Human Mind cannot resist. The Earth Life System has
no comprehension of this and nothing comparable, so there can be no
imitations.
Nostalgia
This is a welling up from your
Core Self of origin memory, which is
best rationalized as emotional values from previous experience in your
present lifetime. In this way it is possible to divert away from the
underlying and implied plea: show me the way to go Home. The Earth Life
System has no comprehension or comparable pattern that is not
system-based.
The closest are migrating birds and salmon, but their
motivations are practical systern patterns.
A
Gentle Touch
A very simple Core Self
expression. A touch instead of a grasp, a pat
instead of a punch, a stroke instead of a shove. Even animals
understand and know the difference. In the Earth Life System animals do
learn a crude version. But all they can do is lick or rub, which may be
enough.
Anonymous
Giving
79
A true demonstration of the Core
Self in action. Altruism and agape are
working illustrations; service to others with absolutely no recompense
or recognition, except to your Human Mind core. In the Earth Life
System this is totally beyond comprehension. If it
happens, it's by accident, not design.
Thinking
Human Minds are thinkers to a
degree not found elsewhere in the Earth
Life System. Once we get past the lures of the system, we discover a
flow of ideas, inspiration, intuition, invention, innovation, all
sorted through for us by our magnificent processor, the
mind. These are products of Core Self directives and are often sparked
by curiosity, a great catalyst for change.There is nothing remotely
close in the Earth Life System. All we find
is some rudimentary toolmaking, some instinctive processes that are
usually attributed to keen physical sensory perception. Some animals do
have curiosity, which often proves fatal.
The
Big Nugget
Because this item of universal
interest is so misunderstood and
misconstrued, it took a special extended investigation to reduce it to
anywhere near a rational level. The following ROTE, passed to me by a
friend, is at least a beginning. Once it is absorbed, it will expand as
it is contemplated. "Love can't be taught, can't be bought. Love can't
be learned. It is
generated within the individual in response to an external stimulus.
The individual has no control over this generation.
80
Once initiated, it
may be layered over or sublimated but never destroyed. Physical death
has no effect upon the reality of its existence, as such energy is
neither dependent upon nor a part of time-space. "It is a (Sun)
radiation, that cannot be grasped and held on
to. Instead, it is perceived, experienced as it passes through the
individual, who adds to it, that additional portion, which has been
generated by this passing. The energy is thereby enhanced and the
individual becomes a constant contributor and recipient thereof." With
the heavy emphasis on sexual arousal and the myth of romance, it
is no surprise that so many claim to experience what we may call the
Big L in their relationships. Not so. The only way you can obtain it is
through shared life experience, and even then there is no guarantee. On
the other hand it will grow on you. You don't have to work at it,
despite what the books say. Time is not a vital factor. The deeper,
more intense the shared experience, the less time it takes. Other
attractions are not necessarily destructive or valueless, but they do
fall into another category. The difference is that the Big L is
indestructible and eternal, and never dependent on local habits and
customs. Friendship, for example, might be construed as a shadow of the
Big L, or at least a kissing cousin. The greatest problem lies in
misidentification. We become entrapped into believing we have found the
Big L, often with disastrous results, when the ideal is not adhered to
by the "loved" one. The most consistent and visible facet of the Big L
is probably mother love.
81
It meets the tests admirably, although it
often gets heavily layered with protocol. Men find the Big L in other
men and women in other women usually as a
result of profound experience over some time, although extended
experience does not automatically evoke the Big L. Yet when
it does happen, sometimes effortlessly and without conscious awareness,
it is permanent in the full meaning of the word. If you work together,
play together, live together, fight, suffer, laugh, and team together,
the probability is increased.
The main characteristic of the Big L is,
that it does not diminish with physical death and you cannot extinguish
it during physical life. Out of necessity, propriety, or for reasons
beyond your control, you may sublimate it, yet it will always be there,
glowing quietly within you. Why the expression "till death do us part"
became part of our culture is a mystery. Perhaps it was inserted, so
that the physical survivor would feel emotionally free to remarry and
beget more offspring to further ensure the continuation of the species.
Otherwise
it makes no sense. The Big L is the Core Self at its finest
distillation. Reflecting on all this, I think that the source of the
missing Basic is now clear—the Core Self. But how do you really get to
know you?
Chapter
7 - Tour Guide
83
As the search for the missing Basic continues, we, as visitors and
participants in the Earth Life System, might now assess and summarize
what we have learned, so that we may be in better condition to survey
and then travel the road, that lies ahead. Our Different Overview is
beginning to firm up, but all the same the question still arises: why
do we bother? Why continue with this hard journey, when we could simply
relax into the comfort of an appropriate belief system? We shall see
later, if the journey brings its own reward. In the
meantime, let's have a look at where we are, and at what our new and
Different Overview reveals. The Earth Life System, for all its
shortcomings, is an exquisite
teaching machine. It brings into focus for each of us in our own way a
wide understanding of energy, and the control and manipulation thereof,
that is generally unavailable except through a structured environment
such as timespace. The Earth Life System is a set of tools, and we
learn to use them.
84
In the Earth Life System we learn measurement. It is a polarized
environment where comparatives are possible. We learn what are hot or
cold, strong or weak, hungry or full, fast or slow, sad or glad, male
or female, friend or foe, love or hate—the list goes on. We learn
energy applications in a useful manner in many different
forms. We operate physical energy both inside and; outside our bodies.
We experience and direct mental energy without ever
truly knowing the details of how because it comes so naturally to us.
Through application of our Human Mind we learn to create in ways and
methods we didn't know existed because they are unique to time-space,
and some are peculiar to and available only in this system and are not
available elsewhere. These provide avenues of expression beyond
description. Similarly we learn appreciation of beauty. We find it in a
lowly rock,
a stately fir tree, a thunderstorm, ocean surf, a cloud-tinted sunset,
a soft-spoken word, a sweeping skyscraper tower, a musical chord, the
leap of a leopard—again, the list is endless. Most of all, we find it,
in what other humans think
and do, in their and our emotions. And we learn to laugh and have fun.
Every single thing we learn, no matter how small or seemingly
inconsequential, is of immense value There—beyond time-space. This is
fully understood only, when one encounters a graduate of the Earth Life
System process of being human, who "resides" in the There. You
then
know, not just believe, that it is worth any price to be human, and to
learn.
85
Now to effect the greatest change in your overview and to provide a
simple and understandable purpose for being here in the Earth Life
System, we need to be specific. This involves looking closely at
something unique to the Human Mind—our thinking process. Current
concepts have it that, aside from our animaldriven activity, our
thinking is divided into two basic categories which we identify as left
brain and right brain. Bear in mind that this identification is only
symbolic and the separation is nowhere near as distinct as left-right
would seem to indicate. Our left brain process is the part of us that
gets things done. It is
the intellectual, analytical area of function. Here lie our
mathematical and speech centers, our logical reasoning, our scientific
method, our organizational talents and teaching skills, and much more.
It is our left brain activity that makes us different from animals. It
is the source of our "can do" optimism. Our right brain is opposite.
From this come our perception of form and
space, beauty, intuition, emotions, plus everything else the left brain
cannot understand or categorize, including love, friendship,
inspiration, etc. The right brain is
horrified at the idea that a left brain formula can be produced to
quantify and qualify love and friendship. That is right brain sacred
territory. Paradoxically, our right brain is the generator of our
feelings of negativity. More recent concepts hold that our human
consciousness flickers back
and forth between left and right brain as situations arise during our
daily physical life. When we perform calculations, our left brain is
dominant.
86
When we listen to music, our right brain takes over. Peak
performance comes when both left and right brain thinking are
integrated, unified, synchronous. A kind of cultural subwar has been
going on for centuries and has come
to the surface only in recent years. The dominant-left-brainers
consider the dominant-right-brainers to be basically
unfit for existence in the Earth Life System and tend to regard them
with contempt or disbelief. The dominantright-brainers look on the
others as unimaginative, dull, overmaterialistic, unfeeling, and
lacking in "spiritual values." It is time now to declare peace in this
battle and to set right this
dangerous misunderstanding. Our prime and fundamental purpose, aside
from learning through
experience in being human, is to acquire and develop what we label
intellect: left brain consciousness. We do not need to act similarly
with our right brain abilities, because we already have them. We
brought
them with us; somehow they were inherent. It is the left brain
capability, that is of exquisite value when we
visit or return to the There, beyond time-space. It is the left brain
that removes the limitations on our growth that were present prior to
our sojourn here. Only left brain function can make Unknowns into
Knowns, dissolve fears, enhance experience, open new vistas, clean out
the false beliefsystem refuse. It is the left brain that takes any
idea, information, or inspiration emanating from or via the right brain
and puts it into
action. By any standards, something of value cannot become real unless
and until the left brain takes over. For millennia the human right
brain has not changed.
87
It has not grown or evolved. It is the same as it always was. In
contrast, left brain consciousness has been steadily evolving, either
by design or necessity. In the past century, this growth has
become an exponential curve, not simply in one or two individuals but
in literally millions of humans throughout the period. Today the left
brain has probed so deeply into the rime-space phenomenon that there
seem few areas left to explore without recycling and repetition. The
energy fields in the There are ripe for exploration. By its very
nature, the left brain cannot help becoming involved in constructive
evaluation and application. The right brain is forcing it to do so—and
the right brain is in charge. What has happened is that our left brain
has become so thoroughly
entrenched—and justifiably so—in providing means of survival in the
Earth Life System that it resists anything and everything that may
interfere with or interrupt the process. What occurs beyond time-space,
in the There, does not calculate by ordinary Earth Life System
standards. More important, information from There appears to have no
value for Earth Life System inhabitants. Only when our left brain
recognizes that such knowledge is a most vital tool for growth in the
There will specific interest be generated. Our Different Overview
includes most emphatically the maturing talents
of our left brain. As we have said, that's what we came here to
acquire. Dominant-right-brainers find this difficult, or impossible, to
accept. As it is the boss, the right brain often forces the left brain
to
perform in a way that tends to destroy thousands of years of evolution.
88
Meanwhile, our left brain continues to pick up the usable ideas and
inspirations of the right brain and make them into something of value.
It tolerates the nonproductive right brain patterns as long as they
don't get in the way. It also heavily distorts some right brain
patterns to convert them into the Earth Life System survivor-predator
organization.
For our Different Overview, here are two definitions: Left Brain =
Human Mind modified by the Earth Life System.
Right Brain = Expression of the Core Self, the timeless, nonphysical
part of us, untouched and unaffected by the Earth Life System. The
trick is to get both left and right brain into simultaneous and
synchronous action, nudging the left brain more and more into taking
part in the There activity. You should never abandon one for the other.
Once all this is in place, you may find that the following points will
help:
1. Always know and remember that you are "more than your physical
body." This will provide instant perspective on any Earth Life System
activity. The agony becomes tolerable, the ecstasy more profound.
Locally induced fears evaporate.
89
2. Recognize and control your survival drive. Use it instead of
allowing it to use you. Here are some suggestions:
a. One part of the formula (Physical Life = Good) is needed for the
Earth Life System and is acceptable during your stay. The other part
(Physical Death = Bad) you can discard because you will know better.
b. Remember that your ultimate goal is not physical survival. Thus,
while it is valid that you are here to do certain things and
there are functions you must perform to be here to do them, you don't
need to be desperate about it. Accidents may happen, but you cannot
lose; you have had the experience of being human.
c. The sexual reproductive drive is the most powerful animal instinct
of the Earth Life System. Designed specifically for physical survival
of the species, it controls and is manipulated to control most aspects
of human behavior. Enjoy it, but there's no need to live or die for it.
And enjoy the
manipulations for what they are; succumb only knowingly.
d. Physical assets (material, food, tools, toys) are great for local
use, but ownership is only a matter of temporary convenience. You not
only cannot but you would not want to take them with you—not even your
physical body.
3. Maintain your transient status. You are being human at your own
option in the strictest sense. That option remains in force throughout
your visit.
90
You may pack up your experience and leave whenever and for
wherever you desire, with no censure or penalties from any source that
matters. If your Human Mind is satisfied, you will do this in spite of
local custom or effort. Earth Life System addicts may not understand,
but that is their problem.
4. Enjoy your life in the System, maximize your highs and lows—but
don't become addicted. Get through being angry at how the system works,
the seeming inequities, the unfair advantages, the brutalities, the
callousness, the deceit. It's a predator world by
design—and it's a superb teaching machine.
5. Exercise your Human Mind as fully as possible, knowing it is only an
exercise. Build beautiful artifacts, solve "problems," smell the
flowers and watch the sunsets, compose music, explore the "secrets" of
the physical universe, savor the input from all of your five senses,
absorb the nuances of close relationships and situations, feel the joy
and sorrow, the laughter, the empathy, compassion—and tuck all of the
emotional memory in your travel bag.
6. Most important, let the Human Mind of you seek out, experience, and
add to your flow of consciousness where and when you encounter it.
Drink it in, but watch out for the tendency to wallow in it due to the
reminders of Home contained therein.
91
Beware of illusions and collusion
which make it sometimes difficult to sort out the real in the
Earth Life System environment.
7. Your Human Mind has a natural and normal proclivity to try to make
things in the Earth Life System much the way it is accustomed to in the
There. History is full of such attempts, but in the end the system
always wins. An edge may have been frayed, but the predator animalism
simply comes back, sometimes a bit smarter than before, and takes over.
That does not mean you don't try in your Human Mind expression, and it
is possible that you might change a part of it, but you will never
change it all. If you did manage a complete overhaul, the system
wouldn't and couldn't exist. Yet who knows how much longer it will
exist anyway? All the above points are Knowns to others and are easy to
verify for
your own knowing through direct logical working of your left brain on
each question or belief. Solidify your Different Overview by proving
these for yourself—and for yourself only. At this point, the Earth Life
System theme seemed complete— but it was not. Another part of me, who
knows deeply the Earth Life System from another overview demanded to be
heard: "It was a long walk through the forest to reach the ocean.
92-93
Along
the way, the path was quiet, except for the hum of insects and the
occasional call of a crow high in the tall trees. In the lush
undergrowth, a slight crackling of dry leaves told of small residents,
if one listened carefully. Under the fresh smell of growing green lay
the deep aroma of moist earth and decaying vegetation, both silent
signals of the life cycle in progress. There was little wind as the
soft rumble of surf grew steadily in strength. Then the forest ended
and the gray-green sea spread out to the horizon, stately cumulus cloud
towers drifting overhead through a clear, clean azure sky. The grassy
bank where the white beach began gave an irresistible invitation to
ease down, lie back, and relax. The waves were gentle, placid; the
breeze cool and soft; the sun warm and fresh. All comes to this, the
beginning and the end of an aeonslong period of time. This living mass
of air, water, and land—what it gives and what it takes—what it
produces. It is more than awareness; more than consciousness; more than
experience. It is more than intelligence, knowledge, truth, and
understanding. The whole is so much greater than the sum of the parts.
It is such a wonderful learning process; learning to separate this from
that, and the differences and comparisons: heat from cold, light from
dark, noise from silence, strength from weakness, pain from comfort,
thick from thin, rough from smooth, hard from soft, balance from
instability. There is the learning of cause and effect, action and
reaction, price and paying, authority and responsibility. And the
options you learn to recognize: stop or start, hold or release, sink or
swim, laugh or cry, friend or enemy, reward or retribution, success or
failure, love or hate, win or lose, organization or chaos. There is the
learning to think: to coordinate, count, calculate, and
communicate; to remember, connect, plan, and have ideas; to daydream,
create, hope, believe, and know. And the ability to experience and
express emotion: joy and ecstasy, sadness, compassion, loneliness,
communion; righteous and irrational anger—and the appreciation of the
beauty of form and movement. And there is the learning to learn: words
and numbers, writing, passing
experience, knowledge, and wisdom from parent to child, generation to
generation, without the trauma of reenactment. Learning to establish
systems, laws, and rules that insure this learning will continue and
expand. It is all there beyond the forest. It is in the ripening
carpets of grain, the neat, multimillion rows of nourishing plants, and
the mills that reshape matter into more usable form. It is in the many
different shelters that are labeled home, the tall and slender towers
that reach for the sky, the motor vehicles that become a substitute
body, the ships sailing around the world atop and beneath the oceans,
the winged carriers that draw white lines in the sky, and the metallic
birds that hover and circle the globe hundreds, thousands of miles
above its surface, each delivering innumerable items of information
every second, day and night. And it is in the invisible yet measurable
network of controlled radiation that serves for communication and local
direction-finding. And there is more, such as the amplification of
perception through lens and mirror and
electronic ears to search
the
94-95
universe for a signal, just one signal, to assuage the loneliness,
searching through stars, constellations, galaxies, novas, and black
holes. There is the illogical thrust away from our blue planet to the
nearby moon, where an indelible footprint was left in the dust. There
is the ranging and reporting of surrogate explorers to view and land on
other planets, and thence moving on into the blackness of deep space.
Learn too of the steady unfolding of the patterns that once seemed
inviolate in land, water, and air; of alloys, compounds, elements,
atoms, molecules, nuclear particles, radiation, and waveforms; of
gravity, inertia, momentum, centrifugal force, polarity; of the organic
and inorganic, the living physical structures and their processes.
Learn of the search for mind and creator; of belief systems, sleep and
dreams, visions and visionaries, philosophies and religions. Learn also
of Love. This then is the wondrous package of achievement through
millennia of
evolutionary effort that we may carry lightly and easily but with
triumph into the far reaches beyond; a heritage of inestimable quality,
to be evaluated and applied in the
There. Yet . . . and yet . . . among the clouds and the clamor there is
an uncomfortable sense of a missing factor, vital and important. Turn
your attention, and a small face appears amid the mass of other
knowing. It is shaped less than human and more than monkey. The eyes
are luminous with emotion. It is there, all of it, in the eyes. From
across the span of timelessness, the carrier of that first spark of
intelligent consciousness, the original ancestor, looks out and
observes with quiet pride and joy, with appreciation but not total
comprehension, and with awe at the growth of the spark. It is the
parent of a prodigal child. Here, seen clearly and cleanly, is one
missing factor—the animal base.
None of this could have happened but for its presence and provision. It
was the living demonstration from which to learn, providing the flesh
to be consumed, the milk to drink, the hides and furs to give warmth,
the stronger back to share the burden, oil for light, and trinkets and
amulets from tusk and horn. There was loyalty too and a form of
friendship, while there were some who found that fur and bare skin do
mix and bring forth patterns of understanding far beyond anything
envisioned. This animal energy was the driving force behind the spark.
It provided not the catalyst but the needs, motivations, and raw
physical power. It is not to be hidden or demeaned but included warmly
and surely as the underlying essential without which nothing would have
taken place. We must hold it up with pride for all to know. And with
the knowing, the little face smiles slightly, softly, even wistfully,
then fades. It is time to move on. The walk back along the path through
the forest is filled with greetings. A squirrel on a low branch looks
down and chatters. A bottle-green fly lands on a hand and enjoys gentle
back-stroking with a finger. Three turkeys stand aside and watch the
passage curiously but without wariness. A gray fox wanders onto the
path and sits down, undecided as to whether to pay his respects.
96
A
thrush glides down, settles on a shoulder, and chirps softly
into an ear, until the edge of the forest is reached. With a final peck
on the
cheek, it pulses its wings and returns to the middle branches. Goodbye,
my friends. But I do take you with me.
Chapter
8 - Recall and Review
97
At this stage, it seemed sensible, before going any further, to search
for the new direction and missing Basic in the area where I spent most
of my effort. After all, I had been involved with this left and right
brain stuff for many years. Was there something that I had
missed—something that, even if it did not answer the questions, might
point the. way? Perhaps a review of what we had been—and still
are—doing would be in order. I mentioned earlier my first out-of-body
experiences in 1958, which turned my life around. At that time, the
Research and Development Division of the corporation which I headed,
whose speciality was the sound production of network radio programs,
had developed an efficient means by which sound could be used to induce
sleep easily and comfortably. In the same year, a discovery was made
that changed the entire direction of investigation and eventually of
the corporation itself: that certain patterns of sound will induce
different states of
consciousness not ordinarily available to the human mind.
98-99
In the
following decades, a continuing program of research brought additional
verification of the effects produced by these states and of the
specific sound combinations and frequencies needed to produce them.
Methods and techniques were found to enable the individual to maintain
and control various mind patterns.
In
1971, The Monroe Institute was
created out of the Research and Development Division to supplement the
research effort. Later the Institute became an independent educational
and research organization. Thanks to the cooperation and input of
hundreds of specialists and volunteers, including scientists, doctors,
psychologists, educators, computer programmers, corporate executives,
artists, and many others, the Institute is now internationally known
for its work in this field. It should be made clear that the early
research effort and expenditure were not aimed at the betterment of
mankind, nor intended to prove any point to the scientific community or
the world at large. It was simply an attempt to control learning
patterns during sleep, and later to understand the relationships
between mind, brain-body, and consciousness phenomena. Thus, until
recently, no academic papers were published and orthodox scientific
methods, though followed wherever feasible, were often ignored when
they proved unworkable. The methods developed contain no dogma or
rituals, nor do they espouse any particular belief systems, religions,
political or social stance. No drugs or chemicals are involved, nor are
hypnosis, subliminal suggestions, or anything remotely resembling
brainwashing. They are noninvasive, and the individual is always in
charge, exercising his or her own will and not under the
command of another. Using the results of many thousands of hours of
research, subjects are
able to learn conscious control of many different and productive states
of consciousness, and the fall-out from this exploration of
consciousness has produced valuable contributions in a host of other
areas. These include physical and mental health, learning and memory,
physical coordination, creativity, problem-solving, and stress
management. The process, known as Hemispheric Synchronization, or
Hemi-Sync for short, provides its users with a self-controlled tool to
accomplish their own goals by facilitating and sustaining a
purposefully focused, highly productive, coherent mind-brain state.
Over the years, new approaches to ways of thinking have emerged at the
Institute. Together they form, as we might say, a Different Overview.
Consciousness
Is a Continuum
In our focused wakefulness, we as Human
Minds employ that part of the consciousness spectrum limited to
time-space. This is made possible by the device we identify as a
physical body, with its five physical senses. This physical body
permits us to express externally our mind-consciousness through
physical activity and communication.
(An account of the methods and
techniques of the Institute, and of the practical applications of its
technology, will be found in the Addenda.)
100-101
When this focusing is
affected for any reason, our mind begins to drift along the
consciousness spectrum away from time-space perception, becoming less
aware of the immediate physical world. When this happens, we become
conscious in another form. The fact that we often have difficulty in
remembering correctly our participation in that other part of the
consciousness spectrum does not negate its reality. The problem lies in
perception and translation, diffused and distorted as they are by the
use of current time-space systems of analysis and measurement. The
spectrum of consciousness ranges, seemingly endlessly, beyond
time-space into other energy systems. It also continues "downward"
through animal and plant life, possibly into the subatomic level.
Everyday human consciousness is active commonly in only a small segment
of the consciousness continuum.
The
Phasing Concept
The methods and
techniques of the Institute can be identified as means to establish and
control phases of consciousness. In the waking physical state, the
untrained mind makes these phase shifts frequently each day with little
or no control. Primary Phasing is the state where the mind is fully
focused on physical sensory input or activity. Any deviation from this
condition can be regarded as a phase shift, where some part or
percentile of consciousness is, to a certain degree, aware in another
form. One example is inattention, where physical sensory input remains
strong but part of the mind has "wandered." What we call daydreaming is
another. Introspection, where attention is
turned away from physical awareness, is a more deliberate phase shift,
as are certain meditative states. Sleep is a shift in phasing to
another state of consciousness where very little awareness of physical
sensory input is taking place. Ingestion of alcohol and certain drugs
evokes split phase shifts, where part of consciousness is "here" and
part in another area of the continuum. In these cases, when the
stimulus is removed, the phasing fades. Psychoses and dementia are
inadvertent instances, and in these conditions drugs or chemicals may
be employed to dim or eliminate the nonphysical area. To understand the
process clearly, we may consider the physical body as a tuning
mechanism through which the human mind can operate in physical
consciousness. As such, it contains circuitry that converts physical
sensory patterns into forms that can be perceived by the mind, much as
a radio or television receiver is tuned to a particular frequency band
in the electromagnetic spectrum. In these receivers, there is a
discriminator section, that filters out for the most part any
distracting or distorting signals or harmonics from other parts of the
spectrum. As we tune a radio receiver gradually from one station—or
frequency—to another, one signal fades and another is faintly heard.
The receiver is shifting out of phase with the original station to the
point where another station can be heard simultaneously. As we continue
retuning, the original station is no longer heard and the other signal
takes over.
102-103
The
human mind, which also has access to a "discriminator," acts in a
similar way. The mind untrained in the tuning process drifts slowly out
of control from one phase of consciousness to another. As it does so,
signals are received partly from the physical mechanism and partly from
a different segment of the consciousness continuum. The signal input
from the physical state diminishes until no such signals reach the
mind, which moves into the state generally known as sleep or
unconsciousness. The learning systems devised at the Institute offer a
means to place these phase shifts under willful control of the
individual. In the early stages of this learning, the mind becomes
completely at ease and feels little fear or anxiety in the resulting
changes. The reason for this is that these states of consciousness are
familiar territory. It is the presentation in a new and organized form
that makes the difference, where any changes are made deliberately by
the mind itself. Left Brain/Right Brain Symbols The Institute's
investigations led to a path being taken which ran in the opposite
direction to that followed by some others involved in mind research.
Almost the whole effort has been and is directed to the utilization of
left brain methodology, of the intellectual, analytical portion of the
mind, to explore the right brain, the intuitive, abstract side. In
exploration of consciousness, most of the research has been conducted
by placing the subject in a booth that insures an isolated
environment. Through methods and techniques employing varying
patterns of
sound, the subject is given the means to enter into different states of
consciousness. Outside the booth, a technician operates the audio and
various items of electronic measuring equipment and records the
subject's brain waves and other physical responses, while a monitor is
in voice communication with the subject in the booth. The stereo
headphones worn by the subject give the effect of the monitor being
inside the subject's head. As such, the monitor becomes a surrogate
left brain of the subject, encouraging the subject to utilize more of
his or her own intellect to know and understand what he or she is
doing. By this method the subject learns to become objective in his or
her
experience, and it becomes possible to gather information and details
not ordinarily available in purely subjective states of awareness. The
result is whole brain thinking of extreme value; cohesive, integrated,
without dominance by either part. All of our training systems, whether
live or on tape, are nothing less than surrogate left brain devices
that enable the user-participant to hold on to his analytical
capability during unusual and even exotic states of consciousness. They
permit growth through familiarity and understanding, and enable the
penetration of the greatest barrier of all—fear. We have discovered
that right brain territory without limitations is a rich and fertile
ground for mining operations by the left brain. It is the coherent
whole brain consciousness, that produces the precious nuggets. The work
is by no means finished. The Institute is still evolving ways to
produce replicable physiological data that identify forms of human
consciousness generally unknown or unrecognized by contemporary
cultural standards.
104-105
To take one specific example: we are looking for
ways and means to bring to accessible levels the various extraordinary
human capabilities that have appeared, seemingly at random, throughout
our history. By investigation of individuals who possess these
abilities, inherent or acquired, such as composers of music, top-flight
mathematicians, outstanding athletes, especially talented therapists,
and so on, we seek to discover techniques by the application of which
such abilities may be learned. Continuing investigation along these and
similar lines offers the prospect of bringing into understandable and
acceptable form the true nature of unorthodox mind phenomena. The
inclusion of these into the contemporary cultural context could become
a significant event in human history. But as I look at my work and the
work of the Institute, I hear a small
voice, a voice, that insists on being heard. "Well now," it says—and I
cannot say I feel comfortable to hear it — "if that's all there is to
your life's work at this point, then there's certainly something
missing. Here you are, showing people how to use the whole of their
brains and have a socalled Different Overview, but you don't seem to be
doing anything to prepare them for what really matters. This Earth Life
System stuff is all very well, but they don't stay here forever. They
expect more and, I have to tell you, they expect it from you. So—what
about it?" What about it indeed.
Chapter
9 - The Hard Way
Both the work of The Monroe Institute and the Earth Life System itself
were strong Knowns to me. Yet there was an uncomfortable feeling, that
clues and traces of my missing Basic were there. I simply wasn't able
to perceive them. I turned again to my own personal activities. One of
the Knowns emerging through repeated examination was that moving into
out-of-body no longer had for me what could be called "movement."
Experienced subjects in the Institute laboratory had reported this many
times, but it was not a part of my personal pattern until I began what
I called the "quickswitch"method. Thereafter what happened was a fading
out of one consciousness state into another. To describe it as "going
out-of-phase" seemed more accurate and satisfied better my left brain
classification system. So this became a repeating pattern. However, I
had begun to notice that whenever things were going so smoothly a major
change was gathering energy. The forewarning was usually so obscure
that only in retrospect could it be verified.
106-107
This time, what
shook me out of my complacency was a series of incidents that began to
occur more and more frequently when I phased out-of-body during the
sleep state. They were remarkably similar to the "tests" I had
encountered years before. These tests were learning procedures whereby,
when I was in an out-of-body state, a given experience was repeated
several times until a particular response was evoked in me. The
experience was not repeated thereafter. These tests were nonverbal and
were apparently conducted by a nonphysical, presumably my INSPEC
friend. We would meet shortly after I left the physical state, and I
would be asked if I were ready. With complete trust, I would agree.
Immediately there would be a loud click, and I would find myself fully
immersed in the experience. Gone and forgotten was the fact that it was
not "real," and I would live it totally. At a crucial point where a
significant decision had to be made, I would make it. Then there would
come another loud click and I was back with the INSPEC. If I had
performed satisfactorily, that particular test would not be repeated.
If I had not done so, I would have to go back and try again until I
did. It never occurred to me to question why I was being tested and who
judged what the correct decision had to be. Most if not all of the
tests seemed completely unrelated to this physical life, although many
of them were couched in human-Earth settings and situations. I assumed
that "someone" smarter, than I needed my kind of answers and I,
sometimes shakily, was glad to oblige. This new version seemed much the
same, except that there was no
supervising INSPEC that I could determine. The episodes occurred months
after our last meeting and there had been no sign of the INSPEC's
presence despite my continuing hopes. As before, the identical
situation would be presented in various forms, all with the need for a
decision. It would have been easy to dismiss them as simply vivid
dreams if they had not been preceded by INSPEC-structured modality.
Moreover, I had not had ordinary dreams or nightmares for years. These
incidents became so strong that they could not be ignored. The
direction change that was coming had been in place long before. The
blow that got my attention was the discovery that various physiological
and mental states were beginning to reflect in my physical waking
consciousness as a result of these activities. In all my previous
out-of-body adventures, there had been no aftereffects such as these.
There had been excitement and exhilaration, or sadness and joy—and
these would be expressed in my placid and relaxed physical body upon
return. But there had never been stomach nausea,aching arms and legs,
rapid heartbeat, the entire nervous system pulled tight. These effects
would often last as long as fifteen or twenty minutes after returning.
Thus it wasn't curiosity but necessity that again pushed me to find
answers—the same motivation that years before had led me to explore the
out-of-body experience. But this time there was a difference. I was not
overloaded with fear and I had tools and friends to work with. And I
had at least the beginnings of a map of the territory.
108-109
The
first step was to review events and actions in the past to try to
determine what had caused this change in direction. In doing so,
perhaps I would get a clue as to the missing Basic. I have described
earlier that, contrary to my own expectations, my whole history of OB
experience was left brain dominant. This neatly verified earlier
findings as to the value of acquired left brain abilities during Human
Mind sojourn in the Earth Life System. One automatically assumed that
OB was all right brain stuff because it was not of time-space and
therefore was totally unrelated to the logical, analytical thinking
process. But this assumption was wrong. In every one of my OB
activities, the reasoning part of me was present to some degree.
Moreover, the greater such participation, the greater the growth that
took place. Growth in this instance can be construed as "understanding
leading to familiarity resulting in application." Without this acquired
ability, it is likely that I still would be wallowing in the air above
the bed or existing only via a prescribed daily dose of tranquilizers.
A typical illustration: In the very early days, I was returning
confidently to my physical body from a "local" out-of-body trip, with
everything under control, everything working as I was sure it would.
Suddenly I slammed against a barrier and came to a stop. I tried to
push through it, but it was as hard as plates of steel. I was positive
that my physical body was on the other side of the barrier, and thus it
was vital, that I go through to it. I went up a vast distance but could
find no break in the wall. I went down, with the same result, and to
the right and the left. There was no way through. I was thoroughly
frightened, envisioning spending all eternity plasterred against this
impenetrable wall. I tried every prayer I could think of, screamed for
help, and finally
draped myself aigainst the barrier sobbing much like a lost child—which
I was. After what seemed an eternity, when my sobbing had worn itself
out,
I leaned back and began to reason. If I couldn't go through the
barrier, if I couldn't go over it, under it, or around it, that left
only one option—to go back in the direction whence I had come. No
matter what I had believed, it could be the only answer. I did so . . .
and moments later I was back in my physical body with ridiculous
ease—thanks to left brain logic. Every succeeding barrier I encountered
eventually gave way to the
information-gathering, probing, syllogistic analysis of that,
learned-on-Earth, part of me. Vast differences in situation and setting
had to be taken into account, but the investigative and learning
processes were exactly the same. Nevertheless, once the situation was
in place answers and solutions did not appear magically. The analytical
tool we call the left brain neatly provided them. I may not have liked
them as they evolved but I could not deny their accuracy. What we need
to do, whether in- or out-of-body, is to ignore or tear
down the No Trespassing signs, the taboos, the notice that says Holy of
Holies, the distortions of time and translation, the soft black holes
of euphoria, the mysticisms, the myths, the fantasies of an eternal
father or mother image, and then take a good look with our acquired and
growing left brain. Nothing is sacred to the point where it should not
be investigated or put under inquiry.
110-111
We
must grant that this requires
a quantum leap for our Different Overview. It can be compared to
getting out of local traffic with its confusion, snarls, and stoplights
and taking the Interstate—a major highway into the Unknown. The map
that we are developing will cover the route as far as our active
consciousness patterns can extend it. But mapping the Interstate is one
matter; traveling it is something
else. It cannot become an absolute Known until it is actually traversed
by the individual with the left brain in full and active mode. Unless,
that is, you begin to remember what it is like. All the same, the map
and a Different Overview may help you to construct a more accurate
belief that may eventually be easier to convert into a Known. Now to
return to my new development, the penetration of my physical
self by out-of-body responses. My left brain insisted that the
physically distracting new signals were caused by some important detail
that I had missed. Was this, I wondered, the clue or cue to the missing
Basic?
I had two options. The first was, now that I understood better, to go
back to the beginning to pick up what I had missed. The second was to
lie around in a beautiful cloud of love and keep on wondering: what if
. . . ? The first seemed more constructive. Having made my choice, I
began to move out of phase at about three the
following morning. Then I used the quickswitch method to the earliest
point in my conscious memory. At once I felt a signal vibrating within
me. I followed it—and came
upon a scene I remembered well. There was someone beside me—it
felt like a brother. He seemed nervous. I
was pointing at the figure of a man lying facedown in the middle of a
dusty road. He was a youngster, no more than eighteen. A battle was
going on all around him. Some fifty or sixty men in short
brown togas with wide leather belts around their waists were fighting
an approximately equal number of dark, bearded men, small in stature,
but who seemed to have incredible
strength. Both sides were armed with short swords, spears, and
round shields. There was shouting, moaning, and screaming,
the clanging of metal against metal, clouds of dust, blood spurting,
confusion. The wide belts, it seemed, were losing. The
eighteen-year-old, who wore a wide belt, was struggling to pull
himself up. The problem was the spear which was holding him down. The
spear had penetrated his back, gone all the way through his body and
deep into the dirt of the road.
His efforts became slower and weaker,, until they ceased. Suddenly, I
remembered that years ago I had felt the pain of the spear
in my back, but this time it was different. I turned to the man beside
me. He was in obvious pain. I asked him, if he understood. He nodded,
then turned and moved away, and disappeared. There was nothing for me
to do but to try to help. I bent over the
youngster and shouted for him to get up. I saw his head—no, not his
physical head—lift out of his body, and I reached over, grabbed it, and
pulled. He slid out easily. I told him to stand up. He did so, and
looked around at the
fighting.
112-113
Then he noticed a sword lying at his feet. He reached down
and tried to pick it up, but his hand went through it. Puzzled, he
tried again. I told him to take it easy.
He
looked at me angrily:"I must get back into the fight. My friends are
dying." I told him, that was impossible, as he himself was dead.
"What are you saying? I am strong—I can think!"
I pointed behind him, where his physical body lay in the dust, blood
congealing around it. He turned and stared at it, dumbfounded. He bent
over and peered intently at the dead face. Then he
looked up at me: "But . . . I'm alive! I'm not dead!"
I asked him exactly, what had happened. He answered vaguely; his
interest was still focused on the raging battle.
"We were marching quickly along the road, looking for the enemy, eager
to join battle. There was shouting—then something hit me in the back. I
was down in the dust, and I couldn't get up—something was holding me
down."
"What happened next?"
"I gave up trying, because I was so weak. I heard you calling—and there
was a click. And I stood up."
I pointed to his body in the dust. He glanced at it, then turned back
to me.
"But I'm not dead! How can I stand and talk to you, if I'm dead?"
I suggested he try to rejoin the battle, but that was a mistake. He
rushed away into the thick of the swords and spears, into the tumult
and confusion. When a sword swing he couldn't dodge went through
him with no effect, he
watched in fascination. A moment later a short, bearded man attacked
him from behind and the
two fell to the ground punching and gouging one another. It took me a
second or two to realize, that the bearded man also had dropped his
physical attachment in the battle. They might still be rolling on the
ground centuries later, trying to kill each other! I went over to the
struggling duo and shouted, that they were wasting
their energy. They were both physically dead, I insisted, and there was
no way they could hurt each other. I repeated this, until they finally
got the message. They rolled apart and looked at me. The bearded man
got on his knees, bent forward, and touched his head to the ground,
moaning an
unintelligible chant. The youngster looked at him bewildered, then at
me.
"He thinks, you're a god. Are you?"
"No," I replied. "Just a friend."
He felt the place, where the spear had penetrated: "There's no hole, no
blood . . . Are you sure you're not a god?"
I laughed, shook my head, and told him, I had to be leaving. Around us,
the battle was less intense. More forms were moving out of destroyed
and dismembered bodies. Soon the place would be crowded with
ex-physical humans, all with bewildered expressions on their faces. The
youngster touched my hand.
"Can I go with you?"
114-115
I hesitated, but a deep inner surge immediately
gave me the answer. I grasped his hand and started to move upward. He
looked uncertain:"I'm not a bird—I can't fly!"
I gently pulled on his hand and slowly we rose above the battlefield.
It took but a moment for his anxiety to drop away, and we both shouted
in joy, as we sped up and out. In my mind I hit the
return code on the quick-switch system. There was a flare of light and
we hung motionless in the lighter grays of the intermediate rings. I
felt the youngster's hand in mine. The question was, where do I drop
him off? Just as I was about to ask
him, I became aware that the pressure of his hand had gone. I
whirled
around. Nothing. No youngster. Nobody. What was going on? This event
was similar to a previous happening in an out-of-body experience many
years earlier, but with some basic differences. Then I was the person,
who was being shown the dying
youngster, because I myself had experienced an inexplicable physical
abdominal pain. Now I was the one, who was showing the "old me" the
reason. I had, it seemed, answered an earlier call for help—from
myself! And the youngster?
Where did he go?
I was about to return to the physical to think it over when another
signal came in strongly. This time I understood it more clearly. It was
much like hearing someone call for help, or a telephone ringing when
you know it's your phone. It was not difficult to home in on it. Below
me appeared a small building, with a hole in the side of it and wide
steps leading down inside. I walked carefully down the steps because
the signal was coming from inside. There lying on a cot was a man
thrashing around wildly. Hanging on to
his back were two children, about four or five years old, riding out
the bucking and pitching. The man was sobbing in fear and desperately
trying to pull the two little ones off his shoulders. I reached over
and gently pulled the children away from him. He lay back in the cot
whimpering in relief. I looked down at the children lying quietly, one
cradled in each of my arms. They were not children, but cats—pets I
remembered well. Cats in an OB state! I put my two old friends on the
roof, walked back up the stairs, and once at the top, pulled the
quick-switch phasing just slightly. I returned to the physical, feeling
that this would have to be thought through logically. It was easy for
me to remember the two experiences I had, as it were, revisited, but
the perspective in both was different. What was the change common to
both?
Logic had an answer, although I did not know how I could accept it. In
the first incident many years ago I was taken by someone and shown the
primitive battle to explain a pain in my physical body that I was
suffering at the time. I knew then that I was the young warrior impaled
in the dust by a spear. Upon realizing this, I had returned to the
physical in relief and understanding. This time, however, I was the one
who was doing the showing. I was the one, who took, the then worried,
me to the old battle scene hundreds or even thousands of years ago to
explain the pain.
116-117
So,
I was the one, who was helping me. Also I was the
young warrior dying in the dust—that was the only way it made sense.
That meant, therefore, there were three versions of me at the same
place at the same time! In the second event from years back, I had been
the one screaming for help, trying to dislodge the little demons, who
wanted to ride me like a horse, who seemed to own me. And then a
serious-looking man came down the steps and took them off me, held them
in his arms, and suddenly disappeared. I remembered, that he had looked
familiar, like a cousin I had known. But this time I was the one, who
came down the steps and helped, by taking the little cat friends away.
I had come to help when I screamed for it! This, I thought, was a
little less complicated—there were only two of me present! Were all of
such current nonphysical events simply calls or screams for help from
other I's in different times and places? Who was this I that had the
audacity to answer these calls? Have I been helping me through all
these years?
The apparent multiplicity and interchangeability of self had yet to fit
a pattern I could accept or understand. Nor did it provide an answer to
the uncontrolled events that were so disturbing to my physical life.
Were they all cries for help? From an earlier me? The prospect was
overwhelming. What my left brain told me was happening was that If from
the future had been going back in time to help the I of the past when
needed. The signals for help were coming from earlier versions of me,
not only in this life but in previous ones. I wondered if this was the
same for everybody. I wondered what had happened to the young warrior I
who had followed me out of the battlefield. Why did he disappear?
Somewhere in the maze was the answer. If I began with the Knowns, the
whole thing would fit somewhere along the way. What I needed to do was
to move into that area in the There that was familiar, and look around.
For the time being, however, I sought and managed to keep things under
control. Then one night several weeks later, I came to a decision. At
the start of a sleep cycle, I rolled out-of-body, moving less
out-of-phase than usual, and taking care about what I was doing. I
found myself exactly where I expected to be if I really needed to take
up the threads again—in the gray area just beyond the entry point from
time-space. Immediately I received a signal. I was attracted to a house
in the suburbs of a large city. The house seemed vaguely familiar, wide
and spacious but empty of furnishings. I slipped in through the front
wall and in the foyer encountered a woman about fifty years old,
gray-haired, small and thin. She was wandering through the house from
room to room and when I put out my hand to intercept her she seemed
surprised that I was there and was paying attention to her.
"Are you here to hang the pictures again?" she asked. I said I was not
and that I was interested in her.
"They took all the pictures down, out of my house. My house! Now no one
even speaks to me."
I asked her why she stayed there. Why didn't she leave?
"This is my house. This is where I belong. I don't care if no one
notices me anymore."
118-119
Didn't she feel anything different? I asked. "Only that nobody will do,
what I ask them to do. They ignore me, as if I
wasn't here." I asked her, if she remembered dying.
"Dying? Of course not! I was sick, but I got well. One minute I was
sick and the next thing I knew, I was up and walking around!" I
remarked, that nobody saw her and, that she was all alone. She tossed
her head. "No one ever sees me. They never paid me much attention, when
William
was around. Now he's gone, they ignore me completely."
"I bet you can't pick up that dining room chair," I said. "Your hand
will go right through it. You'll see!"
"That's ridiculous!" she exclaimed. "Of course I can: pick it up. I'll
show you." She tried several times, and each time her hand went through
the chair
back. She looked at me in confusion. "I . . . I don't know what's the
matter. I thought, it was some sort of
hallucination you get, when you're old. But . . .you can see it too."
I showed her, that my hand went through the chair back, just as hers
had
done. She looked amazed. "You have the same problem!"
People have this problem, I explained, when their physical body dies.
"But . . . but I'm alive!" It is the body, that dies, I told her. The
body. Not you. She was quiet for a time, but she didn't seem to be in
shock. Then she
looked at me anxiously:"I was waiting for William to come back, but he
hasn't. And I love my house so much.
He built it just for me. I don't want to
leave it, I love it so." I suggested, that we go and look for William.
"Oh no, we can't do that! He passed away five years ago."
I repeated the suggestion, adding, that I thought, we ought to try. She
looked at me steadily: "I really am . . . dead?" I nodded. "And you are
. . . an angel? You don't look like one. You're real normal." I was, I
assured her, just a friend. She shrank back: "I've never met you before
in my life! You're not a friend! You must be
one of Satan's devils." I didn't try to convince her otherwise. I said,
I was sorry to have
bothered her and started to leave. "Wait! Please wait!" I turned and
stood quietly.
She regarded me speculatively: "If you really were a devil's helper, I
couldn't possibly chase you
away, could I?" I told her, I didn't know, because I had never met one.
"It's been so lonely. Can we really find William?" We could try, I
said. I reached for her hand and started to lift out
toward the ceiling.
120-121
"I
can't do that! I don't know how! Your
hand is real—I can feel it—but I can't just float up in the air!" I
pulled her hand gently and she began to rise easily. Excitement glowed
in her. "Oh, what fun! Is this being dead? My, my! Let's go find
William! Won't
he be surprised?"
We cruised slowly more and more out-of-phase. I remembered the previous
point, where we had met, many years before. It was in a rented house in
Westchester County, New York, where I lived temporarily. She was still
hanging around the house months after her physical death. At the time,
I had gently backed away from the contact. Now I knew better. I kept us
moving slowly outward because I figured that, somewhere along the way,
William would be attracted by the bait and would take over from me. But
she held on firmly, making excited comments as we passed through the
inner rings of the Belief System Territories. I was becoming impressed.
William had more to him than I had estimated, based upon her perceived
radiation of him. He should be here. But now the only place he could be
was in the outer phases. He had kept his progress well hidden from his
wife, that was certain. I was about to ask her more about William when
I no longer felt her hand in mine. I turned instantly, but she was
gone, completely disappeared. There was no sign at all of her
radiation. The only answer I could come up with was that William was
very good indeed if he was this far out in the rings. I phased back
into the physical to think it over. A few weeks later I tried again.
The process was becoming so smooth that it was hard to define when I
actually left the body. It was more the fading out of one state of
being and into another, similar to falling asleep and staying conscious
while doing so. I was still hesitant to use the quick-switch method for
"short hops." It would be like taking a Concorde to fly from Newark to
Kennedy!
In the deeper gray area another signal was waiting. It seemed too easy;
perhaps, I wondered, I was reading it wrong. I was about to home in on
the signal when somebody called. I turned and saw an odd kind of glow.
It resolved into a man, small, sharp-featured, somewhere in middle age,
with a squinty frown and curled lips.
"Hey, you—where are you going?" I approached cautiously. "Where you
going?"
"Hello."
"Out looking for the Secrets of the Universe, is that it?"
"I guess, that's what I'm doing."
"Good luck! I'm having a hard enough time without looking for anything
more."
"Why, what's the matter?"
"The matter? I went and died, that's, what's the matter!"
"What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing wrong, except I sure wasn't ready for it."
"Maybe we never are ready."
"Well, I could have been but nobody told me! Nobody told me it was
going to be like this! Those bastards yelling and screaming about gates
of heaven, hellfire and damnation—they didn't know, what they were
talking about!
122-123
Anyway, I wish you luck, because they could have told me
like it is, instead of giving me a bunch of hogwash!"
"Well, what's the problem?"
"The problem? Look around you—that's the problem!"
"There's nothing there, that I can see. Just the usual deep blackness."
"That's, what I mean! Nothing, absolutely nothing! Hey, you know you're
the first person I've met? Nothing—but nothing—and then
you come along!"
"I'm sorry you're disappointed."
"You're like me, eh?"
"Like you? What do you mean?"
"You died—you just died—and you don't know, what the hell to do!"
"It isn't quite like that . . ."
"Come on, come on! You're either dead or you're not!"
"I'm pretty sure, I'm not."
"You're not dead?"
"No."
"Then what the hell are you doing here?"
"That's a long story."
He looked at me in disgust: "I bet it is! You wouldn't be here, if you
weren't dead!"
"It's a little more complicated, than that."
"Tell me about it! Hey, I know! Somebody sent you!"
"No, noone sent me. I was just passing by. Tell me, how did you happen
to die?"
"They made me do it, that's how! Lying around in a hospital for weeks
and weeks. I wanted to go home—but no, they kept me there with all the
tubes and
needles, stuck in me. So one night I just yanked them all out. On the
night shift —nobody ever came around to see me on the night shift,
nobody. You know?"
"Then what happened?"
"I started coughing and then I stopped. I thought, well, I'd better
slide the hell out of bed and get going. I must have jumped
a bit, because I went right out through the ceiling and kept on going,
until I found myself here. When I went through the ceiling, that's,
when
I knew, I'd gone and died. Pretty smart, hunh?"
"That's right. Maybe you ought to come along with me."
"You would help me? You? Why?"
"It ought to be better, than staying here forever."
"I'm so damned mixed up! No heaven . . . no hell. Nothing!"
"Here, take my hand."
"No you don't! Every time somebody tried to help me, it just meant
trouble! You get out of here!"
"I'm not forcing you. I'm only trying to be helpful."
"You keep your hands off me! You keep away!"
"All right, all right. Whatever you say."
"Go on, get out of here! And you get somebody to tell you straight!
Don't you get taken in with the fancy talk. Nobody told me . . . and
they could have! I would have listened—but no! Now I've got to find out
all by myself and I sure, as hell, don't know how to do that! Don't
even
know, where to start . . ." I backed away and the strange glow faded.
124-125
When I returned later it was gone. I have wondered since, how he did
get
help. Enough was enough sometimes. Perhaps recounting these events will
bring a little better understanding, as to the idea of a bridge or
bypass over these areas—with Caution signs posted along the way. It
takes experience and finely honed reason to operate in such conditions,
and mine were marginal at best. Any help comes from the top down, I
thought—not from the bottom up. And I had discovered another facet. Not
all of the signals, I received, came from an earlier me. William's wife
was not a part of me, nor was the angry little man, as far, as I could
determine. So I came to a conclusion. Helping others goes with the job.
While you're helping yourself, you automatically lend a hand to others,
if you can do so. But I was missing an important element. Why did this
sequence of events suddenly pop up in my activity pattern? Was this
another key to the missing Basic? What about my new Different Overview?
Something was definitely left out!
10
- Detached Retinue
It was beginning to seem a never-ending task, this answering of signals
for help each time I went out-of-body, and it was certainly an
inefficient way to do whatever was needed. I could spend the rest of my
available physical life period doing this
and nothing else and still make no perceptible dent in the mass of such
signals.
The question was: why had I suddenly become exposed to these signals
after so many years? And another question: why were they causing
distress in my physical body?
It seemed, that most if not all of these signals were originating in
areas off the Interstate (as I was now accustomed to regard it)
immediately adjoining the termination of physical existence, or death,
as we humans call it. I knew something of these areas, but was not
familiar with them. Further exploration was needed. I began the next
morning, about three o'clock, by taking a methodical,
slow-motion approach. Feeling rested and relaxed, I started the phasing
out of the physical and into the blackness of the
out-of-body state, with left brain mode on full alert.
126-127
I was now at the
beginning of the Interstate, or rather on my entry ramp into it. Then,
as I was about to bridge over the close-in areas with their obvious
exit ramps, as
I
usually did, one of the strange signals pulled hard at me. Reluctantly,
I followed it. The signal flashed me to a city, then to an apartment
building, and
tightened in to a bedroom in one of the mid-rise apartments. There was
a large and fancy king-size bed with three naked people in it, two men
and a woman. One of the men was having very active sex with the woman,
while the other was attempting to get in between them, with no success.
Each time he tried, he fell through the bed to the floor beneath. I
knew, he was the one, who caused the signal, and wondered, why he
didn't
keep falling right through the floor. I caught his attention on his
next cycle from under the bed to the top
of the copulating couple. He stared at me in surprise, his glistening
erect penis waving up and down, as he shook with excitement: "Who the
hell are you?" I told him, it wouldn't work. He might as well come with
me. "What do you mean it won't work? I've been waiting ten years to get
this piece of ass, and now I'm going to get it!" Again I indicated,
that it was no use. Things were different with him
now. "You better believe, they're different! I'm free now! I don't know
what
happened, but I'm free! And as soon, as I found out, I came here.
Now if she would just stop
having it with Sammy, I could get it on with her!"
I asked him, what made things different.
"Oh, that! I'd just come up out of the subway at Fifty-third and
Madison
and suddenly I felt a pain in my chest. I fell down. I wasn't down on
the sidewalk long, just a minute maybe, and I got up. Man, did I feel
different! What business is it of yours, anyway?" I told him as
clearly, as I could, what had really happened.
"I'm dead? The hell you say! Do I act like I'm dead?" I reminded him
about his falling through the bed, unable to touch
either the man or the woman. He looked at his hands, then down at his
replicated body. "But I'm still me! I still feel like me! I guess, I
still act like me!" He laughed and I joined in. I remarked, that we
don't change that much,
when we die, at least not right away. He looked at the couple on the
bed, who now had relaxed and were lying back apparently contented, and
then at his own deflated penis. "Buster here won't like being dead!" I
told him: there were compensations and he brightened up. "I must have
had a heart attack then. But I never had trouble with
my heart." I was about to reply, when I noticed the woman in the bed.
Her eyes were
open and she was staring straight at me. She was actually seeing me!
128-129
Her eyes widened with astonishment, but she didn't seem
afraid. She looked straight into my eyes, and there was knowledge in
her stare. I turned to the man, standing beside me, and told him, I had
to
leave. He was shocked: "What do you mean, leave? What about me? What do
I do?" I suggested, he come along, if he wished.
He laughed again :"You can't get rid of me! There's no action here—I
should have known
that. Besides, I want to find out about those compensations."
We laughed some more. I took his hand and started to lift out, and he
followed easily. Just as we went through the ceiling, I looked back at
the girl in the bed. She was still watching, and our eyes met. I knew,
I
wouldn't have to come after her. She already knew. A few moments more
we went slightly out-of-phase. I felt the man tugging at my hand: "Let
go of me! Will you let go!"
I looked below. There was the Pile, the huge mass of ex-physical
humans,
writhing and struggling in an endless attempt to have sex with one
another. The man's heavy radiation had diverted our path. Suddenly he
wrenched his hand loose and dived into the mass. I should have been
alert to the diversion. Well, win a few, lose a few, I said to myself.
I moved away, thinking, that I would get him out of there tomorrow, if
I
could. But before I could return to my body, there was another signal.
I
turned and followed. This one was easy to identify; it came from a
hospital room, complete with life support systems and electronic
gauges.
There was a small figure, a woman, in the bed with all the gadgetry
attached to her. She was folded up in a near-fetal position. Her hair
was gray and stringy, her face wrinkled. She looked very old. As I
approached, I could perceive her moaning and
gasping. Yet the sheet was over her head. I moved close to her and
asked her, what the matter was.
"Can't you see I'm hurting?" I asked her why. "I'm dying, that's why.
I've been dying for years, but nobody would
believe me." I believe you, I told her.
"That's
all you doctors say, but you don't mean it." I told her I wasn't a
doctor, and that I did believe her. "If you're not a doctor, it doesn't
count. It's the doctor, who has to
believe me." Why is that so important, I asked. "So that they'll let me
die. Then I won't have any more pain." I suggested, that she didn't
need a doctor to believe her.
Did she really want to die? I asked. "Of course I do! Why else would I
be going through all this pain?" There was no need to wish for death, I
told her. It was all over. She
was dead.
130-131
For the first time she turned her head and
looked at
me: "No, I'm not! I still hurt!" The pain will be fading away quickly,
I said gently. All she need do
was: to move away from her body. She stared at me. "But . . . I'm still
alive! I'm just the same!" I told her, that being physically dead,
doesn't change you much at first.
You just don't have a physical body anymore—you're only remembering the
pain now, but you don't have the pain
itself. Look around, I said; see for yourself. She did look around,
very slowly. Then she turned back to me: "It's all black . . . just
deep black . . ." Except for me, I reminded her. She opened her eyes
wider, and her body
slowly began to straighten out. "Ernie . . . ? Is that you, Ernie?" I
reached for her hand and suggested we go, where friends were waiting.
She held back. "Why didn't you come before? I've been calling for you
night and day to
come and get me." I said, that she had to die first. Now, that she had
died, it was all
right. I held out my hand again and she took it firmly. "Ernie . . .
Ernie!" We started to move up and out slowly. I asked her about the
pain. She
looked puzzled. "The pain? Oh, the pain. It isn't important now, is
it?" No, it isn't, I said. We went more out-of-phase and out of
blackness
into the light. I took it slowly, as we moved further out-of-phase and
into the area of the Belief System Territories, because I wanted
to see, what was happening. I was
trying to determine exactly, where we were—somewhere above the
midpoint—when I could no longer feel her hand in mine. I refocused as
fast, as I could, but it was too late. She was gone. Picking up pieces
and dropping them along the way was surely not how it
was supposed to be. It was certainly not productive. I had better try
again. The problem was, that I didn't know precisely,
what I was looking for, but I was not going to give up.
Several
days
later I made an afternoon run. I lay down on the cot, relaxed, and
phased out slightly—and, sure enough, there was another signal. This
was a frantic one. I focused on it and used my quick-switch method.
There was a flash and I was over an alley in a small town. I looked for
the reason—and there it was, just below me. He was hiding
behind a cluster of trash cans in the alley. On the street nearby a
pair of police cars, red and blue lights flashing, had angled up to the
curb. On the sidewalk in front of a store entrance
lay a crumpled form in a pool of blood. A crowd of morbid spectators
was gathering, held back by a yellow band of plastic. I went directly
to the trash cans. The skinny boy, crouched behind them,
couldn't have been more, than seventeen, and he would never get any
older. Not this time anyway.
I asked him to stand up. He did slowly, uncertain, alert, ready to run,
if he got the chance: "How d'you know, I was here, man?" I told him, I
wanted to help him.
"I don't need no help, not from no fuckin' cop."
132-133
I asked him, why he was
hiding, if he didn't need any help. "What do you mean, why? That
shithead in the store had a piece and he
started shootin'!"
I suggested, that he didn't need to worry about that anymore. He looked
at me warily: "Gonna take me in, are you?" Not exactly, I said. He
didn't have to pull any more heists, I told
him, and nobody was ever going to shoot him again. He didn't have to
worry about going to jail either. He stared at me: "You're crazy, man!"
I told him, the bullet had caught a corner of his heart, which let him
live just long enough to stagger out of the store and fall dead on the
sidewalk. His face portrayed a mixture of emotions: "What kind of shit
is that? If I'm dead, what the hell am I doin'
standin' here and talkin' to you?" I pointed to the street behind me
and suggested, he take a look for
himself. Still keeping one eye on me, he sidled to the corner of the
alley and peered down the street. He forgot me completely, fixed on
what he saw. Eventually he turned and slumped down to a sitting
position and buried his face in his knees. I could feel his sobbing. I
moved over to him, looked down, and gently touched his shoulder. It was
time to go, I said. He gazed up at me: "They still got cops after
you're dead?" I smiled and shook my head. But there were better places
to be, than
hanging around in a back alley, I said. He looked at his hands: "I
remember puttin' out my hands, to break the fall, when I hit the
concrete. And before that,
I remember lettin' go of my piece,
when the
cashier shot at me from behind the counter. So I couldn't shoot back.
It was like somebody hittin' me with a tire iron in my chest. Then I
got out the door and I remember hittin' the sidewalk. It was like,
there
was a big click in my head—and I got up and ran into the alley. But . .
. but who the fuck are you, man?" I told him his Uncle Ben sent me. He
laughed. "Ben? Ben the boozer? Come on, he didn't even know, I was
around! He
died, when I was a kid!
I know! It's all a new shtick you cops put up, to
get me to roll over! You come on—take me in and stop all this shit
about bein' dead!" If he wanted proof, I suggested,
we should take a close look at the
body on the sidewalk. He resisted at first, so I told him to hide
behind me and nobody would see him. I turned and walked out into the
street and strode through the crowd. I knew, he was right behind me. We
got there just as the ambulance was arriving. We stood directly over
the body—there was blood all over the place—and watched, as they rolled
the body over, checked for any vital signs, and put it on a gurney.
They threw a cloth over the face, but not before the kid beside me had
got a good look. Anyway, I knew, he could still see the face, cloth or
no cloth. As they rolled the gurney into the ambulance and
closed the door, the kid started sobbing again.
134-135
I gently took
his hand and began to lead him up over the street. Now he didn't
resist;
he simply wept uncontrollably, as we moved up, away from the street and
more out-of-phase. This time, as we approached the middle and upper
rings, I kept him under constant observation. Whatever was happening, I
reckoned, I would be ready for it. I wasn't. At a given point, the kid
disappeared. One moment he was there, and then he was gone. Not even a
wisp of radiation remained. Wherever I searched:
nothing. Whatever I was
doing, it wasn't coming out, as I expected. I was getting some action,
but it was incomplete. I returned slowly, until I was back in phase
with
the physical, still looking for answers. There was just one clue. That
night there were fewer penetrating signals. My sleep periods were less
hectic. Was it cause and effect? Perhaps I was taking the right
path—but even if I was, my left brain was screaming out for more data.
I certainly wasn't cut out for this job. I kept losing them!
Then, several weeks later, another change surfaced. I was lying down
and relaxing easily, when I was suddenly hit by a strong help signal,
on
what I understood to be my own frequency, even before I was
out-of-body. My physical body responded with a strong
sense of heat. Quickly I rolled out and followed the signal. Somewhere
over the Belief System Territories the signal led off down an exit
ramp,
that I could only just perceive. It did not take me long to find the
source. The
belief system radiation gave me a picture of a steep rocky cliff
with a heavy, humid jungle below. I wondered, why it was so clear and
real to me. This was unusually rare; the belief system activity is
generally dim and hazy to me at best. A small mature female stood at
the edge of the cliff. Behind her were some fifty or sixty assorted
males and females of all ages. They were humanoid, partly dressed in
animal skins, with heavy, Neanderthal-like heads and facial structures.
Reason immediately wanted to know, why I was buying into this
particular
belief system. The only answer was the obvious one: at some time it was
part of me. The scene brought back, what I called "the lure of tropical
Pacifica", that I had half-suppressed throughout my life. The call of
the ocean was reflected in my sailboat adventures and scuba diving.
Then there was my going to Hawaii for a weekend and staying for three
weeks; going to Ecuador for three weeks and staying for three
months—and almost taking up a career in the tropical lowlands. I always
felt immense nostalgia in tropical settings. As I positioned myself on
the ledge beside the female, the group behind her shrank back and
covered their eyes. I turned to the female, who was staring at me with
calm appraisal. Could we communicate, I wondered. At my thought, she
smiled.
"You
came."
"Yes,
I did. But
why did you call me?"
"I
called a
picture."
136-137
"Why
did you do
that?"
"Are
you Megus?"
She looked at me carefully. "No, you are not."
"You
called for
Megus. Why?"
"Because
Megus
does not know, something is wrong here."
"Where
are you?
Where is here?"
"I am
here. In
the Sky Land of Megus."
"Do
you know, how
you got here?"
"Oh,
yes. I came
out of my mouth with the bubbles, when my body sank to
the bottom of the great water."
"Why
were you in
the great water?"
"It
is the rule
for a female, when she does not make as child."
"And
after that
you came here."
"Yes.
But there
is something wrong."
"Wrong?
With you
or with the others?"
She
shook her
head. "With me. When we jump off this hill into the
valley, we must fall onto the rocks below and die, again and again.
That is the rule of Megus."
"Who
is Megus?"
"Megus
is Sky
God. He came to us many suns past and told us of his Sky
Land. This is what he promised . . . but something is wrong."
"Tell
me just,
what is wrong."
"When
I jump off
the hill, I don't fall and I don't die. The others do,
but I don't. I just float."
I lifted up slowly, until I was just above
her head. "Like this?"
"Yes!
Yes! You
are Megus, you are! Help me keep your rule! Help me
fall, so I can die and live again!"
I
reached out
with my hand: "I am not Megus, but I can help. It can be
good to float. This is a new rule. Come, try it!"
She
grasped my
hand with both of hers and we lifted slowly up and out.
The structure of the belief systems began to fade rapidly, as we
approached the Interstate, and was gone completely, when we went up the
entry ramp. I moved us more out-of-phase, when the change was
indicated,
observing and reassuring my Neanderthal friend. She was calm, relaxed,
but expectant. I was pondering, why I seemed to be so compulsive in my
rescue pattern, when the expected unexpected happened again. She
dissolved, faded into nothing, as I watched. This time I accepted the
phenomenon without question, but I wondered, why I had received her
signal among all the others. Alone, I moved slowly past other exit
ramps, that were dimly familiar. I knew, that at some point in distant
time, I had visited and turned off each of these ramps and was a part
of each of the belief systems, they led to. But there seemed no reason
to go through again, what I had already experienced and presumably
outgrown. Although I felt, I needed help, I did not consult any
of my
philosophic or psychiatric physical friends. Instead, several weeks
later, I did, what they would have prescribed. After three cycles of
sleep, some four and a half hours, I awakened rested, relaxed, and
fully alert at three in the morning.
138-139
To use the quick-switch technique, roll out-of-phase with the
physical, and head for one of my pre-INSPEC friends seemed absurdly
easy. A smooth vibration and I would be there. But it was not as easy,
as that. Somewhere deep in the Belief System Territories a strong and
demanding signal hit me. I resisted, but to my great surprise a part of
me overrode my resistance. When I
stabilized, I
found, I was lying on a
cot in the corner of a small room. I pulled myself up to a sitting
position and stood up. I was in a physical body, it seemed, or a good
facsimile of one. It felt quite normal. On the far side of the room was
a closed door. Beyond it I could hear a
strong humming sound. I opened the door and stepped through. Close by
it was dark; beyond was a brightly lighted area and the humming came
from somewhere beyond that. It was made by many human voices, not
chanting, just humming in harmony. A hand touched my arm and I turned.
A woman stood by me, beautiful, ageless, very familiar. Her face and
eyes were radiant with joy: "I've been waiting for you. I knew, you
would be here, if all of us met
together as One. Come."
She
led me out of
the darkness and into the light. Then she stepped
back. The humming gradually faded away. On the edge of the range of the
light were faces looking up at me, many hundreds, as far back, as I
could perceive. They were expectant. The radiation, I know as Love, was
overwhelming. I stood still, altogether unsure of the situation, of
what was expected of me. Then, as I stood there, another part of me
took control and I relaxed. That other part began to speak:
"I
had no idea:
there are so many of us. This is one of the
few points, where we have gathered as One. As all of us have
discovered,
it took a belief system to get us here—and therefore we are somewhere
on the outer edge of the Belief System Territories. Thus we have
several Knowns. That we are, and can be, here. That we do not need a
physical body to exist and be. This alone has freed us from the
constraints and restrictions, that all of us encountered in our
sojourns on Earth. Even though each of us has a few beliefs left, we
can release them at will. Now we are awakening from the Dream. The
important Known is the one, that brought us together. That not
only were we more, than our physical bodies, but we can be free of any
and all Earth-life-generated beliefs, without exception. This freedom
is the exciting
part, because we now have no limits. This Known, without fear, gives us
a full range of choice. My role is another Known. It is not that of
leader. Leadership is not
necessary in the old sense of the term. Perhaps my part has been, and
still is, as a recruiter. But to me the role of scout, information
gatherer, trailblazer, seems to fit much better. This has been my
pattern . . . for thousands of Earth years and lifetimes. Now it seems,
we are finally at the point of fruition. When we meet again, the move
into various options will begin. The love, we share, is the greatest
Known of all."
The
I-There of
me—the IT, that each of us has, containing all previous
and present lifetimes—reached upward.
140-141
I moved
off the floor
and
passed slowly over the sea of upturned faces. Somewhere from deep in
the multitude an arm reached up and a hand grasped mine. A man moved up
and joined me. Side by side we rose in a slow spiral, higher and
higher. I looked over to see a big grin, as he winked at me. Was it
Agnew? Lew? Rodius? Cheng? It was none of these.
It was my old friend
from my early days of OB exploration—the friend, whom I knew as BB! I
should have known; I should have remembered. BB, who followed me from
Home, from the cruise an Eternity past . . . It could have been no
other. The phasing was complete and the eager faces disappeared. With
them went the feel of BB's hand in mine. I looked and he was gone.The
return to the physical was without incident.
11
- Turning Inward
If an impasse (dead end) is reached, it seems likely, that somewhere on
the way a
distortion or misconception has taken place. A sign along the road was
missed or misunderstood, the wrong turn was taken—there are many
possibilities. Perhaps some small detail was left unnoticed. This is
how it happened. I still had the help signals, the learn-by-being
lessons, but all without satisfactory explanation. The retrieval of
those who had just died and my susceptibility to their signals—and
especially to my own in the past—insisted on my attention. Was this to
be my "new direction"? I felt that I had lost control. Some part of me
that I wasn't aware of had taken over, and I certainly didn't
understand it. I decided that the far reaches of infinity would have to
wait. The prime need was to know myself without equivocation. The more
I came to know myself, the more I would know, what I am in nonphysical
expression.
142-143
And the closer I would come to the reason for the
path I seemed to be taking. Experience is definitely the greatest of
teachers. Now my experience came into constructive use again, with my
left brain abilities in the foreground. The route or access to the
nonphysical I, what I now thought of as the I-There, surfaced almost
immediately. It had started over twenty years ago. Frustrated over my
seeming lack of any ability to explore more than just the timespace
continuum, I had turned inward and asked for help. From that moment, an
entirely new spectrum of being and doing emerged. I was free. Through
all the succeeding years I went happily on my way. I had not realized
that, in spite of my apparent ego, the I-There of me had been doing the
driving and navigating since that point. Never once had I taken the
trouble to look under the hood, as normal curiosity should have led me
to do. Now, in pursuit of the missing Basic, instead of following the
usual steps after phasing into out-of-body I put a hold on all of the
urgent signals and began a probe around me, inward instead of out. Many
such sessions spaced over a year were involved to get the information
into workable form. This is what I found. The move out of physical
phase and into my I-There was slow and careful. I formed the impression
of an all-powerful, all-knowing giant who watched bemused as one of his
fingers began an independent, self-willed exploration of the rest of
his body. I felt no fear, because of the Known: I was I-There, I-There
was I. Can
one be afraid of oneself?
The
Memory Layer
Turning inward and penetrating the I-There of me, I
immediately encountered the expected: a layer—or file, library, or
mainframe—containing every moment of my life to date, with more pouring
in that matched exactly my thoughts and actions as I conducted the
investigation. Other signals were still coming in from my physical
body. This was far more than memory, as we consciously think of it.
This was the reception point of the uplink from the present I-Here—the
I that functions in the physical world—now only an operating physical
body without consciousness. I tested the storage system several times
with great fascination. Upon selection of a given point in the past, I
relived the event in every detail, down to each minute sensory input,
thought, and emotion. I soon realized such Supermemory was not
altogether pleasurable. With such intense hindsight, one becomes all
too painfully and sadly aware of the many irrational decisions made,
the stupid mistakes, the missed opportunities. The exciting incidents
were no longer exciting because I knew the outcome. The joyous moments
often seemed infantile, and the infantile sad and amusing.
As an example, I had a very young memory of hiding under a big bush
just outside my grandmother's front porch. Afterward, I could never
understand why I had been hiding there. I wasn't afraid, but
something kept me there. Now I knew. I had feces in my pants, and I
didn't want Mommie to find out. A big moment for a four-year-old! More
relevant and revealing items were easy to find, among them incidents
that in their ways were early precursors easily overlooked. One such
occurred in 1934, when I flunked out of Ohio State University in my
sophomore year with a less than 2.5 grade average. This was partly due
to a severe facial burn which meant spending some time in the hospital.
After I recovered, feeling restless, I hit the road looking for work. I
began hitchhiking, but after about a week I discovered that people
wouldn't pick up a dirty-looking kid so I became a hobo riding freight
trains from place to place. In St. Louis during mid-December the cook
in a small hash joint saw me staring through the steamy window at the
food frying on the grill. He waved me in and fed me without charge. As
I hadn't eaten for two days, it seemed a miracle. Then, later that
night, in a Salvation Army-type flophouse, an old man died quietly on
the cot next to mine. I had never been that close to someone dying. I
felt no fear, but curiosity. After nearly a year, I returned to Ohio
State in Columbus, pleaded and was granted conditional reinstatement.
During my junior year, Strollers, the campus dramatic society, offered
a prize for the best original one-act play. The one I wrote received
second prize. The first three were produced and presented to a campus
audience. Perhaps the peak moment in my college career came as I stood
offstage in the wings as some five hundred people sat in a
you-could-have-heard-a-pin-drop state during the climax of my one-act
drama.
144
The reviewers said it should have placed first! The play was based on
exactly what happened in the flophouse, except for the addition of the
climactic moment. What was it? In dying, the old man passed to the boy
a Special Purpose, a Goal, a Plan far beyond ordinary human thought.
The boy was transformed into something or someone else. This came from
an eighteen-year-old who had never taken a course in philosophy, and
was not religious—as were none of his friends at the time. So where did
he get the idea, and why? This incident had evidently been long hidden
as not important. It took place at least twenty years before there was
any such occurrence as an OBE in my life. Likewise relegated into the
same category of nonimportance was another long-hidden memory that
perhaps I had earlier regarded as some sort of hallucination. The
location of this was an old farmhouse we owned in Dutchess County, New
York, during the late forties. The well had run dry. It was not the new
type of drilled well, but one that had been hand-dug a hundred years
ago or more. It was about three feet wide, seventy feet deep, and lined
with rounded fieldstones wedged together without mortar. Listening, one
could hear water running far below, but the pump couldn't bring it up
through the pipe. Usually one doesn't hear running water in a well. My
curiosity was caught, so I got a rope out of the barn, tied it to a
nearby tree, and skittered down inside the well like a mountain climber
rappelling down a cliff When I reached the bottom, I
immediately found the problem. The water table had lowered and the end
of the pipe was above the new water level. The interesting part was
that there at the bottom was not still water but a running underground
stream. If a few rocks were put in the right place the water level
would rise again. Then I looked up and panic set in. Far, far above me
was a tiny circle of light. Between me and that point of safety were
seventy feet of loose rock, any chunk of which I might have disturbed
in climbing down. At any moment that chunk could drop away and trigger
the entire wall to collapse on top of me. There was evidence of the
possibility on the rocky bottom on which I stood. Several large,
basketball-size rocks lay there, having fallen from the wall sometime
previous. A feeling of intense claustrophobia came over me, with some
justification. If I could not get out quickly, I might well be buried
in a seventy-foot grave—and no one would know. With an effort, I sought
to control my panic. I knew I would have to be ultracareful in climbing
up to avoid dislodging any of the rock wall. I sat down on a large
fallen rock to think about it. Reaching down with my cupped hand, I
took some mouthfuls of the running water. It was cool and fresh. As I
sat at the bottom of the well, listening to the gentle tumbling of the
water, my eyes adapting to the dim light, I began to relax. There was
something very calm and serene and comfortable about being where I was.
I even looked up at the circle of light far above me and the sense of
peace was not disturbed. I felt no more panic. I closed my eyes and
leaned comfortably back against the rocky wall of the well.
146
There was no need to hurry now. I relaxed even more, and for a moment I
thought I was asleep, but I could hear the water and feel the stone
against my back. My physical awareness was still complete. Then the
pattern changed. Slowly, the feeling of a warm intelligence seemed to
surround me, flowing very gently into my body. It seemed to blend into
every part of me, body and mind. I became a part of that intelligence,
or the intelligence became a part of me. There didn't seem to be any
difference.
And there was a message. I could translate it into words only crudely.
My son of sons of sons, you have found joy in my winds and sky. We have
shared the excitement and peace both on my waters and deep within them.
You have reveled in the beauty and ingenuity of my other children
spread across my surface.
Yet it is only now that you have taken a moment in my bosom to be still
and listen. In that stillness, hold this song forevermore. You were
born of me, yet it is your destiny to become more than I can ever be.
In this growth, I revel with you. My strength is your strength; thus
you take with you the glory of me to express in ways that I will not
understand.
Not understanding, I nonetheless support and share happily that which
you become. Go with this truth within you, my son of sons of sons.
That was it. The warmth continued for a while, then slowly faded.
I stood up, took the dangling rope, and climbed effort-
lessly to the top of the well, scrambling out into the sunlight,
was astounded when I discovered I had been in the well fo over two
hours.
Now I remember that special Basic. Mother Earth, I love you! How could
I have forgotten?
Further investigation into the memory layer revealed a near-identical
dream that had recurred monthly at least for a number of years. I was
at that time an active airplane and glider pilot, and in this dream I
would find myself turning my aircraft onto the end of the runway,
applying power, and beginning the takeoff run. As soon as I was
airborne, the runway turned into a street with buildings lining it on
both sides. Crossing from one side to the other overhead was a network
of cables and wires, much like those still found in older downtown
business areas. Try as I might, I couldn't find a hole or gap in the
network through which the aircraft could fly. After a period of anxiety
and frustration, I would wake up. This dream did not recur once my OBEs
began.
Some psychologists with whom I discussed this dream suggested that the
downtown street setting was a symbol of my commitment to the business
world. Others speculated that the network of restrictive wires
represented my cultural belief systems. All agreed that it was a
well-assembled logical metaphor tailored neatly to meet what I was at
the time.
Searching again, I found a clue as to what might have been the evoking
mechanism or trigger for what happened afterward. My company, seeking a
new area for diversification,
was investigating whether sound might be used for learn-
148
Ultimate Journey ing during sleep. As professionals in sound, having
produced several hundred network radio programs, we tried a number of
different audio patterns with various subjects to study the effect of
these patterns upon sleep. Beginning in 1956, I had been the chief
subject in this testing and underwent at least a hundred sessions lying
in a darkened booth and listening through headphones. But my two
children, and many others,
had also spent many such sessions, yet with no comparable effect. Was
this my OBE trigger?
Thus I passed through the memory layer, knowing that total recall would
be available if and when needed. All the same, reliving the past
without the rose-colored glasses of nostalgia is not my idea of a fun
afternoon!
The Fear Layer Moving inward to the next section of my I-There, I found
an area I had definitely not expected. I discovered that I was indeed
far from fearless. I may not have been consciously aware of these
fears, but there they were, large, ugly blasts of raw energy,
embarrassing to me, and to no one else, in their intensity. There were
old fears and a constant inflow of new ones. They ranged from little
items, such as anxiety over the effect of a rainy day on our
construction project, to big worries about the world changes
developing. Even the fear of physical death was there; not of the
process and what lay beyond, but of what might be left undone here in
time-space. I realized action would have to be taken to clear up this
mess. The I-There of me already had a better system at work;
The tests I had been undergoing during the past five years,
where I nonphysically experienced an intense event that engendered a
familiar fear time and time again until the fear dissipated, were still
in place and operating. Moreover, the battle was almost won. Many more
fears were being dissolved than the number of new ones which were being
generated by my current activity.
With this awareness came a major revelation: I-There had instituted
this process and kept the fear-dissolving operation flowing as needed.
No outside source was providing any assistance, as I had wrongly
assumed. I was helping myself!
Thus the finger became a hand. I preferred the feel of the hand.
How this was taking place aroused my curiosity. Recognizing that
I-There provided me (I-Here) with more than a casual connection, I
began to search in my present mind-self for other evidence of ongoing
participation by my I-There. It was very easy to move deeper, but
initially the effect was neardisastrous.
I learned what I am! And much adjustment was required to become used to
the reality of "what I am."
The Emotional Layer This was the next inward cloud of energy that I
met. I knew all of these emotions, not those that had been repressed,
but those past and present that I had lived and treasured, both joyous
and sad, and the irrational angers that were now so amusing to me. As
with the fears, there was a constant incoming pattern, mimicking what I
felt at each moment.
The interesting part was that this layer seemed so neatly organized.
The Broken Barrier
151
This was much like a ragged hole in a gray wall. As I attempted to go
through this enticing gap, there was a slight resistance and then I was
through. As I penetrated the gap, the texture of the original
restraining energy of the wall was absolutely clear to me. I also
understood what had happened in my own pattern, what had made that
hole. The answer was simple erosion through repeated experience. The
amusing part was, that in my eagerness I had never paused to notice the
very real existence of the barrier. What was the barrier made of? Earth
Life System addiction and the multitude of belief systems generated
therein. Evidently I had once slipped through a crack, either by
accident or otherwise, and kept widening the opening by usage—probably
through gathering information and increasing experience—until that part
of the barrier crumbled.
The Repertory
So . . . What am I? Beyond the barrier there were hundreds and hundreds
of what appeared to be waving beams of multicolored light. Uncertainly,
I reached out and touched the nearest one. A rich male voice rang in my
mind.
152
Well, well! Curiosity pays off again, Robert! I pulled back quickly,
but the chuckling stayed with me. Immediately another brightly glowing
beam, mauve in color, came close. This voice was female:"Of course!
You're not all male, Bobby!"
That was only the beginning. The process was repeated again and again.
Each time it became easier. Now I realized that every beam of "light"
was one of me, one of my I-There personalities complete with a
different life experience. Lodged within my I-There was a corresponding
life pattern of each personality in great detail. This, I realize, is
an inadequate description, because each is a conscious, sentient being
with an individual awareness, mind, and memory. Communication was easy
because I was holding forth with myself! However, there was so much
that I could only skim the surface. The emotional elements were too
strong to go deeper. When I phased over into the I-There of me, finding
each one required merely the thought of that pattern in my present life
activity. Some of them were familiar, as I knew of them as driving
forces in my present life experience. Here are the most salient:
The Architect/Builder
This was in the era of cathedral and castle building during the twelfth
century in England and the continent of Europe.
153
I was dismissed in disgrace when I objected to the appalling cost in
lives of worker-friends, when huge stones fell from crude scaffolds and
crushed those on the ground beneath.
I refused to comply with the irrational whims of those in power. I
emigrated to France, where the same sequence took place, but with a
different ending. Someone in angry authority had me beheaded. This part
of me was reflected early in life, before I was ten, in the building of
wooden shacks two and three stories high. Later came the design and
construction of theatrical stage sets, and then the design,
engineering, and construction supervision of various buildings in
Westchester County, New York, and then in Virginia, which gave me such
deep satisfaction.
This also explained the deep sadness, amounting to physical illness,
during a recent trip to England and France when we visited various
cathedrals and other ancient buildings. The effect was so marked, that
we cut short our stay in both London and Paris. In my I-There the
details were completely available, but the emotion was much too great
for me to go very deep. I tried to learn what my name was at that
point, but received only an amused, repeated response.
"You were you! You!"
For a time I could make no sense of this, but an interesting
verification came in 1990. During a summer vacation in Europe, my
younger brother Emmett and his wife went to Scotland to visit
what is known as the Munro Fields just north of Inverness. They took
photographs of Foulis Castle there,
returning home without comment to me about the trip as they didn't
think I would be interested.
In November, Emmett received a notice from our Institute regarding
activities for the coming year. In it was a photograph of the tower in
the new East Wing of the Center.
Astonished at what he saw, he made copies of his Munro Fields pictures
and sent them to us. In his Scotland pictures,
the distinctive feature of Foulis Castle is a tower that matches ours
beyond coincidence. Both have four stories, are octagonal and embedded
into the side of the main building, have the same general dimensions,
the same roof pitch, and both even have similar iron fencing at the
top, tied into the building roof, although this is not visible in these
photographs.
I didn't know of the existence of Foulis Castle and its tower, nor had
I ever been to Scotland. My brother had never seen or known of the
Institute tower because it had been built since his last visit to
Virginia.
Who built the Foulis Tower? According to Munro clan history, Donald
Munro and his son Robert, in the mid-twelfth century. So there was some
hard data. I was I after all!
154
Reincarnated Tower Note that both towers are octagonal, with similar
roof pitch, both are halfway in the wall of the building, both have
similar dimensions, and are four stories high with access to the roof
and wrought iron fencing at that point.
Foulis Castle Tower Munro Fields Near Inverness, Scotland Constructed
1151 A.D.
by Robert Munro & father The Monroe Institute Central Tower
Nelson County, Va., U.S.A.
Constructed 1989 A.D.
by Robert Monroe & friends
The Rebellious Priest
This I-Then was an initiate, at some indeterminate time, about to
participate in a secret confirmation ritual in the deeprecesses of an
old stone temple or church. He—or rather I—had eagerly looked forward
to this moment without knowing the procedure as it meant wide
acceptance and advancement within the culture. The ritual began with
the priests forming a circle around a flat stone altar, chanting in
droning tones.
A frightened young girl was brought in, stripped of her clothing, and
tied spread-eagled on top of the altar. Although shocked, I-Then could
not help becoming sexually aroused.The high priest motioned I-Then to
move in and possess the girl. I stepped dutifully forward, stood beside
the girl, and staring down at her fear-stricken face was caught by
something in the depth of her eyes. After a long moment, I turned away,
looked at the high priest, and shook my head in refusal. Immediately
there was a bright flash of white light and the life of this I-Then
ended. In my present lifetime, this fits neatly into my repugnance for
any man who forcibly performs the sexual act with any but a totally
willing female. I had always presumed from previous intimations that
this particular I-Then was executed for refusing to follow orders. But
the I-There inventory had a different approach. The "temptation" was a
test. If I-Then had tried to rape the girl, he would have been stopped
and thrown out of the priesthood. But in refusing he passed the test
and was welcomed into the elect. The bright light was a symbol of his
conversion into a new life.
Who was the girl? My wife, Nancy. Prior to this disclosure, she had
remembered a past where, as members of a religious sect, she had been a
nun and I, a priest, where all we had was intense eye contact.
156
Aircraft Pilot
The time, location, and species are unknown. This I-Then was a member
of a very close-knit family or tribe numbering several thousand whose
base of operations or home was in the side of a huge cliff. There was a
landing/takeoff pad just inside a large cavelike entrance, and small
one-person aircraft were the only means of transportation. The aircraft
had short wings and were powered by means not translatable.
The pilot lay in a prone position, with head slightly raised, forehead
resting on a swiveling pad. Control was effected through a learned
mental process. I-Then was totally and willingly dedicated to the
purpose of the group and spent most of his—my—life flying such aircraft
on reconnaissance or observation sweeps over a rugged landscape. There
was a deep sense of friendship and love in the memory of that home in
the cliff. There were also moments of much amusement when on these
missions rocks and spears from "natives" below struck the underside of
the aircraft with the shock resonating up into the I-Then body. The
aircraft was near-indestructible.
Years ago, when I was a teenager in this present lifetime, I attempted
to build such a prone-position aircraft. During World War II, I tried
without success to sell a prone-pilot fighter design to the aircraft
industry as an answer to G-load- ing and other performance
problems. This was before I had the slightest interest in or awareness
of the extent of what I now know I am, and I gave no thought then as to
the source of the idea. The Vibrationist I had assumed this facet of me
to have sprung from the energy system that was my origin, which I had
loosely labeled KT-95. My most recent visit there—to Home—neither
confirmed nor denied that assumption. What we construe as music was
indeed in full force throughout the system, although not in the
creative forms, that we understand. The I-There inventory unveiled a
personality, about which I had perceived only vague shadows. Both time
and location were indeterminate, and the species were probably
nonhuman.
This I-Then is a major, but evidently frustrated part of me, which is
constantly attempting to replicate, what was commonplace during that
particular life activity. I have usually tried to express this in
music. The present culture/civilization lacks the knowledge and the
tools to do so in another form. In that life, full and complete working
application of vibration in any form is as natural as breathing is to
us. It is a part of their DNA package. They have and use the ability to
manipulate matter to suit whatever need through mental vibrational
energy. The "music" they create is the utilization of nonphysical
energy, but not the electromagnetic field. Not only does it induce
moods and emotions of every sort, but it instills or inhibits a variety
of sensory patterns somewhat resembling our physical input, yet not
nearly so limited.
158
Most of this I-Then is beyond my I-Here comprehension. I now simply
recognize the presence of such a personality and let this self do and
express what is possible and feasible. My major curiosity is how the
I-There of me ever got involved in such an unusual lifestyle. The
inventory does not reveal this—or at least I could not find the answer.
The Seafarer
This vivid memory was that of a first mate on sailing ships in the era
of square-riggers. Only the more unusual events are clear to I-Here.
One in particular was passage through a narrow strait, possibly
Magellan, close-hauled during a very severe storm. We spent many hours
stationary relative to the shore, battling currents and wind.
I had
taken the wheel because we had drifted to within fifty feet of a
boulder - littered shore. Inch by inch we finally made it through the
strait, losing three crewmen in the process. Although we had several
lines paid out astern, none reached them. To slack off in trying to
save them would have meant disaster for the entire ship. One of those
lost was my best friend. In this present life, though I was born and
raised in the Midwest, the coast and ocean drew me like a magnet. In
New York, one of the first items I bought, when money came in, was a
small sailboat. Within an hour I was proficient in sailing it without
instruction.
160
Many adventures followed, including a single-handed all-night run
twelve miles offshore during a storm. I was never afraid at sea and
eventually ended up with a forty-two-foot ketch. I always loved sailing
and I often still long for the ocean.
The Newcomer
This was only a flickering ray of light. When I reached out to touch
it, the image of the teenage warrior from earliest times came into
being, the one I had retrieved. I was not surprised but wondered if he
had merged with me on the return trip. I was embarrassed at the wave of
adoration emanating from him and cooled it down with a grin and a
handshake.
The Original I
This one I had become familiar with through my final visit to KT-95 and
was definitely not a physical being as we understand the label. My
understanding still is, that I became curious about human existence
while a "tourist" visiting other realities, including time-space. After
one dip in the Earth Life System waters, I became addicted. The
repetition of life in KT-95 had become boring. But how that original I
came into being was not known either to him or to me. We never gave it
much thought. But now I see the light behind it and the thought of that
part of my I-There brings pounding thunder. For one who had never been
particularly interested in "previous lives"?
161
Instantly this thought triggered noisy laughter. From where? From whom?
It was all around me, and in me. There was no form I could perceive,
but there was radiance, in me and of me. Then within me I heard a
voice. All right, young friend. Now you know. Take this ROTE with you
and come back when you have unraveled it. The shock of the voice and
the laughter brought me fully phased back into Earth Life System
time-space and my physical body. Wonders had been done for my Different
Overview.
12 - Inside the Inside
163
I did not find it easy to adjust to finding myself confronted by a part
of me I didn't know existed. However, communication was absurdly
simple. This was not surprising, as when you talk to yourself there is
no barrier of any kind! "Talk" is not the right word; communication was
far speedier, than the spoken word would allow and to call the exchange
"conversation" is extreme understatement. What follows is a compendium
or abstract of many sessions with the I-There of me, beginning with the
second meeting. All I had to do was phase in gently, pass through the
broken barrier, and I was inside, in the dome of light beams, in the
heart of my I-There. We wouldn't use the term "heart." It is too
physical. In the center then. We are what is meant by "the total is
greater, than the sum of the parts."
164
Then you are the total of what I have been, whatever or however that
was. The focal point, the tip of the pyramid of you and more, including
you as you are now. It must be rather a mess!
Not at all. We are highly organized. You know the memory layer when you
moved in?
I do.
It's neatly set up in serial form, and also by category. So are all the
other existence patterns we've been through. You can look up what you
want immediately.
That's good.
Consider all that fear stuff that bothers you. That's easily taken care
of. We convert it faster than you bring it in. You should recall what
you were like some thirty-five years ago.
Or look at some of the people around you. Talk about mess!
I can imagine!
Can you? It's easy to forget when it's not in front of you.
I passed through a mass of emotion coming in. I must be repressing a
lot of stuff I wasn't aware of. I suppose I—we—have a system to manage
that also.
We certainly have. There is less than there used to be but the quality
has improved tremendously.
165
Anyway, these days you usually let emotion control your actions only
when you want it to. You're doing well.
Tell me, is there some name, some identification I can use for you? I
gather you have more than one.
We have whatever is needed at a given point. We're the brain trust, the
think tank, the older brothers, whatever. Why don't you use one of
those acronyms you're so fond of? How about Board of Advisors—BOA? Or
an abbreviation of Executive Committee—that's close to what we are.
I'll settle for that—EXCOM!
Fine! Look, now that you've taken the trouble to come in and clean up
your act, as you might say, we can really begin to move.
Come in and clean up my act? What do you mean?
You finally worked your way in here after all those years.
There were so many times when we helped you along and you never looked
back—we were sure you would come and investigate.
But you didn't. So we had to use more direct methods, like the physical
body pain echoes and the pulls you called help signals.
Did you generate those?
Ordinarily they are items we take care of when you are busy being
you—being awake and human. We decided that if you had to take care of a
few of them yourself, you might become curious. And you did.
166
Let me get this straight. You've been helping me all my life?
Certainly we have. Sometimes you appreciated it, sometimes you didn't.
How far back does this go?
Before you were born.
You had better tell me. I don't remember.
You wouldn't. You didn't exist. We made the decision to become human
again. We selected the time and place and organized the DNA
mix—elements from the physical and elements from us. We took those
parts of us that seemed most appropriate,
rolled them up into one, and sent them in. There you— and we—were!
What exactly did you send in?
Personalities, memories. What else?
Yes . . . I've tracked some of them down. Does this happen with
everyone—with all humans?
As far as we know. Some don't have as much experience as we do, or as
much to choose from.
Are there any with no experience at all? Any who come in . . . pure?
A lot have no previous human experience, though they have plenty of
some other type—both physical and nonphysical. Some work up from being
animals.
167
Do any come in and go out with just one human lifetime?
We have heard so, but we haven't met one. Or we couldn't identify any.
Why are there all these repeats and recycles—these multiple lifetimes?
Up to now human lives have been and are used in such a random way, that
it's not possible to get wide enough experience in any one life. So we
keep on returning, until we have what we need. Does that make sense?
There ought to be a better way. It doesn't seem organized or efficient.
You ought to know.
What do you mean, I ought to know?
Remember your guided visit far into the future? As we saw it,
the whole thing there was certainly organized and efficient.
You go in, select the experience you want—and off you go!
That's a long time to have to wait.
You're free of time, remember? Only one more return after this, into
that life you visited up ahead, and then we're free.
So my Executive Committee has it all mapped out . . .
We certainly have.
A committee is made up of parts. Which part are you?
168
I was a court jester in France, in the ninth century. I was a good
talker. That's why I was chosen to meet with you. It would keep down
any tension that might arise in you.
I don't have any tension . . . well, not much. Now, let's get back to
what we were discussing. Did you help me in childhood?
We were in close touch in the first few years. This happens with most
little ones. The influence is quite strong until parents and others
bring about a gradual shutdown. Children learn not to talk about
something that's unacceptable. Later the physical contact fades away
rapidly.
Was there anything more?
Not much. Most of the time we just watched you. We did keep you from
drowning a couple of times. And there was a time when you were very
ill. You even turned up here and we bad to escort you back.
That must have been when I had scarlet fever. But what about later on?
And other things—the two dollars under the board,
when I was a teenager—did you do that?
That was one of Talo's tricks.
Who's Talo?
One of us—one of you—who lived in another energy system.
Was there anything else?
169
There was the time when you were seventeen, driving at night on the
back road along the river. You were going too fast over the top of the
hill—and there was an old truck in the road.
You never knew how you got round it without killing yourself,
did you?
I remember! I remember wondering what happened. So you did that?
Not me. But one of us did.
I think I'm beginning to understand. You are sort of my guardian
angels—or that's what some people would call you.
Oh no. We aren't your anything. We and you are the same.
You've been helping yourself all the time. We are just the part that
helps you remember. You and Talo both put the two dollars under the
board. You and Cass both, that time in Hawaii, made the surfboard drift
onto the right heading so that the fishing boat would pick you up. You
and we have continually been going back and fixing things up. Do you
want more examples?
I'll be damned!
No you won't. We won't let you. This life experience you're putting
together—it's far too valuable.
Why? What do you mean?
It leads to freedom. And it's your ride—you're in charge.
We're not much more than a cabin of screaming passengers hoping we'll
find it and shouting advice.
170
Find what?
The way out. Escape velocity. Not just eternity, but infinity.
I . . . I think I see. What am I supposed to do?
You are the best chance we have ever had. We shall support and help you
all the way. We can't do everything, but there's a great deal we can
do. Encouraging you to think what you call "out-of-body" finally worked.
Did you do that?
You remember those dreams beforehand? How you were trying to fly an
airplane off the ground but there were always wires overhead?
I do—very clearly.
Those were practice sessions we had when you came here during sleep.
Yes . . . it's beginning to come back . . .
You were so frightened you didn't notice our pulling on you—not then.
And the rest of the help along the way . . . I had the impression
recently that I actually did some of that . . . not you.
You can interpret it like that. You did have a little help. Remember,
we're not confined to time—nor are you as you are now. We can go back
ten years or a thousand years—it's all the same. We are generally
up-to-date in giving help.
171
Then . . . I'm no more than a surrogate of you . . .
When you began this lifetime, yes, you were. As you grew in experience,
you became a brand-new personality. The mix
you started with has been gradually melding into a whole.
This is something I shall have to get used to. "I" helping "me"! I used
to think the help was all external . . . Tell me, is there anything
you—we—can't do?
We shall let Asha deal with that. He's a good technician. He will
communicate with you now.
Asha . . . ?
There was a slight change in the frequency.
I am Asha. Can I help you?
I . . . I was asking about the limits . . . what we can and cannot do .
. .
I do not know what we cannot do, but I am aware of what we may achieve.
Well . . . I have often wondered why I can't seem to perform certain
actions, that apparently others can.
What actions are they?
Seeing radiation from people, reading minds, having what we call
psychic ability. All I can do is phase out-of-body.
Do you wish to perform these other acts?
172
Now that you ask . . . no, not necessarily.
We did not believe those were needed. But if you do want one of us to
use your body and talk while you go somewhere else, just relax and go
to sleep.
No, I don't want to be a channel. That's not a route to freedom, as I
see it. But . . . I wish I knew the answer to what I should be doing
now.
We cannot give you that answer. We can give you the support you need,
and the information. But you yourself know what to do. All of us are
behind you. You don't know your own strength. Go find out—that's what
you should do. If you succeed, and we are sure you will, we shall be
free.
This drive I have . . . to help humankind. Where does this fit in?
We can tell you something about that, though you may not like it.
I need to know.
Service to humankind might be classified as self-serving, but in your
case, because the effect spreads so widely, this does not apply. The
more we improve humankind, the more our prospects improve. One major
improvement is equal to one hundred minor ones.
You mean one tall mountain is equal to a low range of hills.
173
Except that the mountain reaches higher.
So this service—this improvement—is worth doing?
Most definitely.
What of the bonding we identify as love? Where does this energy fit in?
My friend, we have so much of this bonding built up to take us to
infinity and through it. We take it with us as we go. It is the major
energy base for our intellect. What you now perceive as love clarifies,
not stultifies. It incorporates both pain and pleasure; it is the union
of opposites to create a whole.
And you found plenty of love this lifetime, once you dispensed with
your illusions.
There must be a tremendous amount of experience stored here, in you . .
. in us. How many lifetimes are there?
A thousand perhaps, or more. We stopped counting long ago. Every
possible situation is here, every emotion. There is nothing you can
encounter in an Earth life that isn't stored here . . . in fifty
different ways.
Then what am I doing, going through it all over again?
To find one final piece. And you are very close. When you have it, we
lift off. We shall be gone.
Gone where? How?
174
We don't know. You will have to tell us.
I see . . . But—are you certain you have the right one? I have an idea
that there's another one being human here at this time —another one out
of this I-There of ours.
That is so. That is your reserve or substitute, you might say. A
backup. But you are first in line.
This other . . . is it—she—female?
She is.
Should I arrange to meet her?
Later perhaps. She would seem like a long-lost sister.
So . . . Now, let me be sure I have understood this retrieving business
correctly.
It is nothing unusual. Many of us are working with it most of the time.
Why don't they just come back here of their own accord?
Would you have done so fifty years ago?
I don't know . . . probably not.
What happens is, that some become so locked up in a belief system, that
they never come back here, not even during sleep. We lose about nine
out of every ten that way. They forget about us here completely.
175
We keep helping anyway, hoping they will eventually remember—and
sometimes they do. We are there to catch them when they fall through
the cracks.
That's not a good success record! But not all of those I picked up were
part of us, were they? I hope not.
Only one or two. The others you retrieved—they disappeared when their
belief systems took over, didn't they?
So that's what happened!
Their belief system is all they have to hold on to. So they go where
they think there is some kind of security. But they never forget our
attempts to help them, even though it doesn't fit with what they
expect. In time a doubt arises, perhaps ten lifetimes later, and a
representative from their own I-There retrieves them and brings them
back where they belong.
Have I ever been lost in the belief systems?
Yes, you have.
Why did I finally respond to your help?
It was a combination of things: more curiosity, less fear, no heavy
indoctrination.
I don't like asking this, but there is something more I need to know.
How many lifetimes have I—I mean, we—been locked in belief systems?
Who can say? A large number, certainly.
176
What a waste! And how many times have I—this I—strayed or disappeared
on the way here?
Enough. It was not a waste, not at all. We gained much learning from
what happened. We learned so much from those other lives, that this
time we believe it can be made to work.
Made to work? What can be made to work?
The building of what you call escape velocity. So that we—all of us—may
be free.
Yes . . . I see. Can I reach you again as the need arises?
From this point on, we are - as close to you - as your own skin.
Now, my friend, you must do what you have to do. And above all, do it
in love.
It is impossible to describe the sum of the love energy distilled from
more, than a thousand lifetimes, which, as I have learned, each I-There
of each human has in store. Moreover, the discovery and working
knowledge of the existence of my "Executive Committee" within the
I-There of me, as well as the structure of my I-There, radically
altered my own Different Overview. This discovery filled in many holes
in my Known file, that had existed for so many years. So I am now sure,
that every human has his or her own individual I-There, complete with a
particular self-grown Executive Committee. With your new Different
Overview in place and operating, finding your own should not be nearly
so difficult now that—perhaps—you can accept that it may exist.
177
You need to look for your own answers and, when you have
found them, put them in your personal Known file. Maybe you will be
able to understand why our personalities are so complex.
More than this physical body? How much more!
13
- Fine Tuning
179
There is a great advantage in knowing your vehicle well, especially if
you plan to travel where there may be few service areas.
My newfound knowledge of my I-There vehicle raised my confidence factor
several levels. The extraordinary thing was that I had traveled so far
without taking the trouble to find out what made it run. For some
undiscoverable reason,
my left brain curiosity had for once let me down. This knowledge
created a profound change in my Overview. There were so many potentials
that I'd been unaware of, and so many responsibilities and limitations,
that it made me
uncomfortable to dwell on them. The greatest of these responsibilities
was that this I among the many that composed my I-There was expected to
deliver an important answer or solution. Although I'd been told that I
knew the question and was on the track of
the answer, the concept still made no sense to me.
The knowledge also caused many changes. I no longer was concerned with
my sleep activities, whether I remembered
them or not.
180
Now when I relaxed and drifted out-of-phase into sleep, my
EXCOM took over and we worked together. Many of our tasks involved
helping through, or retrieving, after the physical death process. In
most of these instances, we became
what we were perceived to be: father, mother, departed friend, even
some "heavenly being." Those who were not part of our I-There cluster
slipped away and disappeared into the Belief System Territories. In
these cases we were assisting as a kind of courtesy those who for
whatever reason were not met by a representative of their own I-There,
or who had missed the entry points to their particular belief system. I
soon became accustomed to their disappearance when I had them in tow.
Like the sex addict, each phased out when we encountered the radiation
of a belief system with which they resonated. The major task of my
I-There was to pick up previous life personalities
who had been overwhelmed by Earth Life System addictions or various
belief systems so that the essence of the personality was unreachable.
When the individual Human Mind finally broke the grip of the belief, or
found a crack in the system, one of our I-There members went on a
retrieval mission. Time was not a factor in this, except that all such
"rescues" took place in what we would label the past. The helping mode
is another constant within the individual I-There
member. This involves the insertion of ideas,
thoughts, even physical stimuli, into the physical life of others
resident in the Earth Life System. I became aware how much help each of
us receives that we do not perceive or that we simply accept without
question.
180
Again, such help is not limited by our concept of time. It is
never forced on anyone, but is
provided as a response to a cry for help, a signal which might be
translated into a prayer in various belief systems. I began to
participate with my I-Here consciousness in the above tasks.
The learning simulations continued also, often at my request in order
to understand a given condition. Whether I actually remembered these
processes that took place during
"sleep" was irrelevant and it mattered not how long the process took.
It took some effort to accustom myself to the idea that my I-There was
not a sports car but rather a bus or spaceship, filled with a small
universe all of its own. I came to see myself as no
more than a shuttle craft or a scout probe operator for the mother ship
or orbiter. In waking hours, contact with my I-There is immediate. I
need only
think of my EXCOM and indicate the performance desired. Instantly,
memory echoes of similar events or situations from previous existences
flash through my awareness. Some are very profound, others are stupid
enough to illustrate
perfectly the infallibility of hindsight. If I need the response to be
clear-cut, moving slightly out-of-phase is all I need to do. I still
wonder how many humans are hospitalized and drugged because they "hear
voices." From I-There?
It seemed to me that I had reached a very significant stage in my
progress. With this knowledge of the existence of my I-There—and of the
I-There of every physical human mind consciousness— and with the
immediate availability of my EXCOM, a new perspective was
added to what previously was considered ordinary and accepted. But if
something as important as the I-There structure had
hitherto been ignored, what other item of major significance might have
slipped through?
Deciding to consult with my I-There, I lay back and phased over. Is it
right that there are no influences in my life other than you in
my I-There?
We have not said that.
What are they, then?
One of the greatest influences is the interaction with other units.
You mean humans? Structured much as we are?
Correct.
So they do influence us, even in the nonphysical cycle.
You know this. There is also the total of all the human thought
processes that ever were, ours included. You call it the H Band Noise.
That can smother you if you let it.
I realize that and I have shielded myself from it. But there's
something else. I still respond with a host of emotions of all kinds. I
can't help myself. What is it?
Earth life consciousness in its various forms. For instance, you are
experiencing a love relationship. Another: all we have to do is think
of little kittens or trees and you respond.
182
I can't argue with that. What more?
Even the Earth
itself. There are so many influences. And there are also
the nonhuman intelligences. We have tried to steer you away from them,
as much as we can.
Why?
Some early
encounters with some of us did not work out well. They do not regard
humans in the way, we thought, they might. They have a
sense of superiority, because they have evolved in a different way.
So there are no big
brothers in the sky?
Not in the way we,
humans, dream, that there are. The difficulty is that
these intelligences have abilities in the manipulation of energy, that
we cannot yet conceive of. And they use them without the restraints, we
put on ourselves. You may ask Talo. He is the only working nonhuman, we
have with us.
That's amazing! How
did Talo . . . join us?
We think, it was an
accident. Accidents do happen, you know. Sometimes what we think of as
accidents or miracles are no more, than
some nonhuman intelligence interfering,
we don't know why.
I've had several
out-of-body events, that seemed like contacts with
these intelligences.
That's what they
were. But they lost interest, when they realized, you
were too conscious to forget the incident. I see . . . Are there a lot
of these intelligences?
Too many in the
physical universe. Trillions perhaps. And there's the
other one.
The other one? The
other nonhuman intelligence?
Would you believe,
that in all of our history, ours and yours, we have encountered only
one nonhuman intelligence with an origin not
in time-space? There are others, that seem to fit the category, but
they
are very rare—or hard to perceive. In any event, we have met only the
one.
No wonder we're
lonely.
That may be. Now we
cannot give you an answer to your next question. It
lies with you.
You are sure? You
mean about finding our options?
That is so.
I still don't
understand, why it should be me. I'm not a philosopher, or
even a super-researcher. You are the best opportunity, we have had. You
don't know your own strength.
But we do. And much
can change now, that
you have taken this step inside.
Much has changed
already. Can you help me with one more thing? Can you
tell me about the influences I have to watch out for—to be aware of?
14
- The Sum and the Parts
191
With the accumulating load of influences as real, as they seemed to be,
I began to wonder, if it were possible ever to have a Different
Overview
strong enough to control their input.
It seemed extraordinary, that I had managed to move in any direction
with such restraints to hold me back. But I had, and in that fact was
hope. Because I know, I am not all that unique, there is hope not only
for me, but for anyone else with a good, solid Different Overview. I
felt, that other discrepancies might exist, that I had ignored, so
before
taking the next and vital step, I returned to my I-There for a final
question session. As I lay down and relaxed, it took only the blink of
an eye for the contact to be made. This question of influences is
troubling me.
You need not be troubled. You have learned control of enough of your
receptors to manage. If your receptors were not in phase, the
influences would not be received.
Thinking positively helps, does it?
Partly. Deliberately ignoring the (negative) input helps more. Every
lifetime we have is full of such influences.
Every lifetime? How far back . . . ?
How far back do we go? We can't relate it to your time measurement
system. May I show you something?
Please do . . .
. . . And there
they were, thousands upon thousands of lines, each
glowing with energy, extending outward in many dimensions, from where I
was . . . the I-There of me! Some lines were bright, some dim, but each
ended in, what seemed, a cluster of radiation . . . another I-There.
How
could I have missed such a connection . . . ?
You did not miss
it. You merely perceived them in another way. These
are the sum of all the personalities we have ever been, connecting with
those we think of and those, who think of us. The bright ones are those
associated with you in this lifetime.
My God!
No, friend. No god
here as you think it. Sorry.
So many of them . .
. so many of mine, my connections in this lifetime
. . .
You understand,
that these are not all restraining influences, by no
means. When we go, all the love connections will either go with us or
will help us on our way.
192
Your own love, that
you have now—she goes with us. You may be sure of
that.
Are all of us here?
There are some
still locked into one of the belief systems and others,
who will be in and out of being human during the next thousand years or
so, but when you give the word we shall all be assembled. So will all
the others, that you saw bonded to us.
When I give the
word . . . for what?
To go.
Where?
Wherever you say.
There is no need to worry. You will know.
How will I know?
You will know after
you have made your exploration—your run along what
you call the Interstate.
When will I be
doing that?
As soon, as you are
clear of this concern about influences. Let us turn
to something else. You were considering the number of physically living
humans, and how many of them have as much or more ability, as you have
to move around without the physical body.
Yes, I was. There
were about six thousand of them.
Now look at the
influence you could have if there were six thousand of
you! You could change the world very quickly.
Then why hasn't it
happened? What haven't we heard about them?
They keep
themselves quiet and hidden, as you said. We did not expect,
that you would come out into the open, but one in your personality
pattern insisted, that you did. You thought at one time, that you would
really change the world, but that was not our intention. The others,
who go without the body, simply keep quiet—and exert influence.
But why? What
purpose is served by keeping quiet?
That is your
emotional personality speaking again, always wanting to do
good. The others know, that they cannot change the system and they
don't wish to. They are content to enjoy themselves in the Earth Life
System and the only influence they exert is to maximize their
experience. They do not want their abilities to be known by anyone.
Will they make the
same Interstate run, as you expect of me?
They probably
already have. You were slowed down, because of the
influence of those, who knew about you, and what they demanded of you
as a result. You lost some of your freedom and it took time to get it
back. Now there is one more area left to cover. The Nonhuman
Intelligences.
What do I need to
know about them?
You should remember
only one thing. They may seem more intelligent,
than you, but all they have is more experience. They know more about
(M) Field resonances, than you do.
194
Those, who used to
be human, are the ones you need to watch for. They
know more about being human, than the others, so they can influence
you, if you're not careful. But we are confident you can manage.
And the
others—those, who were not human?
They are
unpredictable. There are two kinds. There are those, who had
the same origin, as we did, but lived physically elsewhere in the
universe. They know how to work in time much better, than we
do, but for the most part they have only a curiosity about humans.
What about the
second kind?
That is for you to
discover. When you have done so, when you have found
the right one, we shall have a new home. You will search among the
Nonhuman Intelligences, and you will not be deluded or led astray.
The search. Can you
tell me exactly, what I am looking for?
Where we go next.
We have been storing up knowledge and experience and
now we have learned enough here. There is no reason for us to stay.
I see. And that is
why I shall make this run?
It is. There is one
thing you should know. Whatever you encounter,
nothing, absolutely nothing, can destroy you. You are (M) Field energy,
regardless of a physical body.
That's comforting.
Perhaps we shall enjoy the journey.
No, friend. Not we.
You do this alone. We are your guiding beacon to
help you return. We shall be waiting for you, to show us, where to go.
But . . . what
happens, if I don't come back? Or if I cannot find
anything . . . ?
There will be
another one of us, at some time.
And what about me?
You will join us
and wait. But you need not think of that. We have
confidence in you.
I wish, I was as
certain, as you are.
We can help you
with that. We can show you a sample of the support, you
have here, in our own cluster. Do you wish to see this?
Please . . .
. . . Thousands of
hands reaching out to touch me . . . eyes staring at
me with joy and hope . . . overwhelming radiance I know as love,
sweeping over me and into every part of my being . . . all of these I
am . . . we are . . . and emotion, from the bittersweet smell of
success to the pain of parting, mixed with fun and laughter, the anger
of ignorance, the blindness of belief without foundation, the beauty,
the sound of singing voices...
Does that help you?
It does . . . Is
there more?
196
More, than ten
thousand times more. All the other clusters you saw,
that are bonded to us.
Now I think I
understand . . . I wish I had not lost contact with my
INSPEC friend. He might have come . . . Why are you laughing?
I thought you would
need a demonstration. Do you recognize this?
. . . The feeling
is familiar . . . I have been here before—but when?
There are people moving inward, flowing inward . . . there is a
tremendous surge of love and brotherhood, and sisterhood . . . my own
excitement builds . . . It is our retrieval flow, retrieving our own
from outside the Belief System Territories and from the Inner Rings.
But this was the feed to the INSPEC area! I remember! And I was
escorted by my friend . . . My friend? One of you! INSPEC—that was a
poor label.
Tell me, who was
it, that I talked with, who was so patient with me and
knew the answers? Why are you laughing!
Who knows you best
of all?
I . . . me? I was
talking with myself? But what about the time factor?
You were talking
with yourself—who else knew you better?
So that's why the
meetings ended! I ran out of information.
And as the INSPEC,
I knew better!
That was so. The
process served a valuable and necessary function at
that stage in your growth.
It did indeed. But
I don't remember playing the INSPEC role.
No. You have not
done it yet.
Oh . . . Then I
will do it when . . .
When you return.
Does that make you feel more confident?
It puts an end to
any fears, I might develop.
Good. Now, do you
have the sequence clear? Do you remember the visit,
you made in the period ahead?
I do. Past the year
3000, I called it.
Do you realize,
what was to happen after your visit?
I'm not sure . . .
That is when all of
us will leave. All of us, together with many other
I-There clusters, who will go with us.
So that is it. I am
to find out where and why.
Correct.
And then what will
happen to me?
198
As you do not want
to go Home (to KT-95) anymore, you will wait here with us,
after you finish the physical sojourn, you are now involved with. Then
with us you will make the final journey.
So I do complete my
present life?
Of course.
Remember, when you return, you will have to take on all
those INSPEC meetings with yourself. Now, do you need anything else?
I will contact you
if I do.
No, this is the
last meeting, until you return. We have work to do and
so do you. You have our love. What else do you need?
I need nothing more.
I accepted what I
had been told. I was assured of my return, although
the question of success was another matter. I had good evidence too,
that I was indestructible, my I-There floating in the (M) Field for
thousands of years. We are made of the same stuff. As for my
assignment, I understood now, that it was beyond mere curiosity. It had
all been carefully planned, even if I did not know, how to identify,
what
I was looking for. I wished, that I could take a friend with me to make
it less lonely. Then I realized, that I wouldn't be alone, that the (M)
Field love radiation would be with me all the time. So here was the new
direction, where the Basic would be found!
15
- Long Trail A-Winding
201
The most bemusing aspect when mapping out the route of the Interstate
has been the vast number of areas, that I had left unexplored.
Evidently when I had enough information for a specific purpose I had
ignored or glossed over any additional data. This, however, did have
some advantages; if I had been aware of the potentials, I might have
given way to caution and called off any further exploration. I like to
think of myself as adventurous, but not foolhardy, in my
curiosity-seeking. But now it was far more, than curiosity. With a
Purpose, a true, emerging Basic, and with all apparent influences in
their respective proportions, I was ready for a full-scale approach to
what earlier I had taken so casually. One line ended and another was
about to begin. Here, allowing for the usual problems of translation,
is what happened.
3:00 A.M. November 27, 1987...It is easy to start, lying down,
focused attention...
202
resist the tendency to speed up the
process, keep it slow, don't miss anything this time . . . relax,
breathe evenly . . . now the beginning of differential phasing . . .
the fading of physical input as phase separation deepens and
nonphysical sensory mechanisms begin to take over . . . wonder why
there was ever fear . . . this is much the same, as going to sleep, but
without loss of consciousness . . . moving, moving . . . and now above
the Earth, high enough to see the curvature . . . and higher . . . a
huge globe, much as the astronauts saw it, beautiful . . . filled with
so much action . . . the memories flood in . . . gently close them
down, except for one . . . yes, as a son of sons of sons you go with me
. . . the essence, that helped me be what I am, always with me,
joyfully. Shift the phasing more . . . only blackness, deep blackness .
. .
blackness with texture . . . a slight shift more and there they are . .
. millions of tiny flashes of light moving in rite of passage in two
directions . . . flowing inward toward and outward from where I have
just emerged, each a human mind-consciousness in transit, inward for a
fresh start of a new experience in physical life . . . outward to a
predetermined sanctuary or a belief-driven illusion . . .Slowly
changing phase . . . deep sadness for those, whose flight slows to a
halt in bewilderment and confusion . . . the brighter lights of those,
who enter from outside, the retrievers, the helpers, who calm the
distraction of death panic. . . you know about this, when you've been
both screamer and consoler . . .
203
Then the Belief System Territories, with their exit ramps leading off
the Interstate...move by them slowly, one after the other...too
dim to see what lies beyond...next the more familiar, more
discernible, leading to the great religions...accessible for those,
who need them...much inflow of light into these, and a sprinkle of
outflow back to the Earth Life System...open the phase shift more,
slowly...yes, the Last Timer Ring, there it is...do I stop? no, pass it
by, move on out, farther, farther...clusters of light,
human energy lights, a multidimensional carpet of them, endless . . .
I-There clusters . . . how did I miss them before? Now I understand the
inflow and outflow . . . mine is there, but I must stay on track . . .
the outflow of helpers, finding lost parts of their cluster...the
inflow bringing them back. And that other steady outflow . . .
thousands and thousands . . . the insertions of groups of personality
units into single fresh humans in the Earth Life System . . .open the
phase shift slowly, steadily...distinct separation...nothing,
but (M) Field . . . I know this point so well...the meeting place
with my INSPEC...with myself - so many times and I learned so much...no
more now...just blackness...move on, on...a figure
approaches, human, human-shaped...greets me with a wave...fades
out, as I shift my phasing slightly...now I am past human thought
influence...I have been here before, but never like this...it
was lonely then, but no more loneliness...
204
Sudden pressure all around me, encasing me . . .relax, don't
struggle, don't resist . . . no fear . . . wonder . . . feeling of
soft, gentle energy penetrating every part of me . . . inquisitive,
asking, intelligent . . . let me ask . Who? . . . energy ceases its
movement . . . use nonverbal . . . make a mental line outward, flexible
. . . the line straightens, becomes taut (tense) . . . there is a
picture—twin suns, a Planet orbiting, glowing sparks moving in and out
of the Planet . . . one travels down the line to here . . . the
pressure holding me shuts off . . . another picture of two arms
extended in welcome . . .send question . . . trying to read the
response . . .restless and bored, I learned all there was to learn on
the Planet and began to explore outward. I have a physical form on my
home Planet—like a fish—no, more like a dolphin . . . a dolphin . . .a
flash of warm friendliness, and then nothing. He read my love of
dolphins, and like attracts like . . . but where was he from . . . he.
. .
Rotate phase shift slowly . . . ought to be coming to KT-95 soon, but
not to stop . . . my first childhood . . . a sudden bright light, blue
. . . and a voice in my head . . .Turn back! Is it a command or a
warning?
It is both. Turn back! Return!
I can't read it . . . but if it reads me, I must be able to . . . no,
it doesn't have a mind . . . automatic . . . not physical, energy only
. . . a device . . . may be dangerous . . . let me send . . . I cannot
turn back, I belong past here . . .Identify!. . . a picture, remember
KT-95 . . . the colored clouds, the music, the games . . . The blue
light blinks out. It is gone. A watchdog? Who put it on duty? Now, this
is familiar . . . a flash of my original home. KT-95 I called it, but
that is not its real name . . . only a memory . . . move past without a
backward look . . . flashes of light far off on either side . . . am I
going too far? Blackness ahead . . . should I stop and consider? This
may be pointless . . . more lights . . . one straight ahead . . .
careful . . . slow down . . .
Well ! So you have come to join me! I did not have to come back to meet
you. . . this radiation is unmistakable! It is Miranon! Miranon—how
many times did he visit us with his serenity and his clarity . . . via
OBEs in this lifetime. Miranon! Are you still on your forty-ninth level?
I am, but I am ready to move. You come at the right moment: I was not
intentionally trying to find you.
I know. I perceive what you are doing. You have learned much.
Yes, I have. And I understand now your purpose in returning.
The task of gathering in your parts, as you called them, is not easy,
is it?
That is true. As with you, others are performing that function, other
parts of me. Now you too are searching.
But I do not know what I am searching for. Is what I seek the same as
your goal? We are gathering together the parts of us, up and down in
time, from belief system to belief system. I cannot—we cannot—leave,
until we gather all in.
That is so.
Then, my friend, what do we do when we have completed our task?
That is what keeps me moving onward to higher levels. I think I see the
end, but then I see greater vistas beyond.
Perhaps we should search together.
No, my friend. We move at different rates. I cannot change, nor can
you. And I perceive you have found the way and I have yet to find mine.
I don't understand. Found the way?
The way to obtain your answer.
206
I have? Where?
You passed it by and did not consider the opportunity.
Passed it by? I missed something again? Where?
At the point of your first origin. That is what I am seeking. I have
yet to find my original source. I am sure the answer is there for me.
It may be the same for you.
My origin—KT-95? But I know it very well. There is nothing new there.
Not new. Old—no, that is not the term. First. The first and the Source.
Look at the Source.
Back to the beginning. I shall try.
I wish you well, dear friend. Do not be concerned. We shall meet again.
Of that I am sure.
Go with love.
Warm radiance washes through me and fades, as the glowing figure moves
away. Was the meeting accidental? It came just when needed, when the
distance ahead seemed endless, bringing me added strength to give
increased impetus. But I must turn back—let me explore a little
farther, before I do so . . . What? Blinding energy—I cannot move!
A voice in my head—a cold, admonitory voice . . .
I am the Lord thy God, whom you serve.
. . . A feeling of intense pressure, as if I am dissolving . . . now I
am in water . . . my lungs are full of water . . .I must have air . . .
get rid of the water . . . no, it can't be, it isn't so . . . there is
no water . . . I have no lungs. I am being made to think, that is where
I am . . . it is an influence . . . I know it is not so. The pressure
releases . . . I can feel fingers of energy probing for the core of me
. . . I can stop this . . . close the receptors . . . close tight . . .
I remember how . . .
You do not remember! You do not remember!
But I do . . . I remember the tests, the training experience from my
I-There . . . they were so real . . . I am ready, ready for this
demanding energy . . . it cannot harm me. But what is this? What god
can this be? It cannot harm me or affect me . . . be calm, warm,
friendly . . .
Do you not accept me as your god?
. . . the idea of a god, that threatens, amuses me . . . I let this
idea flow out . . .
208
Do you not fear me?
. . . I release a picture of me blowing apart again and again into
millions of fragments, and reconstituting after every explosion . . .
You are damned! You are no more, than wasted energy of me, who is your
Lord!
. . . the energy fades to a tiny point and vanishes. How many more like
this may I encounter? . . . a waste of my effort . . . What did Miranon
say? I should go back . . .back to KT-95. Let me do this. . . close
phase shift . . .move in slowly . . . it looks the same . . . just the
same . . . rainbow clouds . . . I'll stretch out and rest for a while,
lie in the clouds and listen to the music . . . yes, that's better . .
. the origin . . . but it's just the same . . . always the same. It's a
blind alley . . . there's nothing more here . . .can't phase in
anymore. I might as well try something else, when I've rested . . .
What shall I do next? Here it is the way it always was . . . even the
curls of energy below . . . I remember when I was a curl, playing skip,
as they are now . . .wait . . . wait . . . skip . . . roll inward . . .
I remember . . . but what if? what if? . . . reverse it, reverse skip .
. .what happens?. . . careful, careful . . . it feels much stronger
now, than it did then . . . the movement . . . the music is fading . .
. clouds dissolving . . . the curls are gone . . .
210
nothing now, nothing, but a spiraling mass of energy moving outward . .
. moving inward bit by bit . . . like swimming upstream . . .the spiral
becomes tighter, tighter . . . narrowing, very narrow . . . the current
is stronger . . . hard to move against . . . but still moving . . .
hard, hard . . . takes too much strength . . . ahead of me the vortex
point . . . a little more, little more . . . too small, can't get
through it . . . concentrate energy . . . skip . . . skip . . .a surge
deep inside me . . . another, larger . . .taking me over . . . another
wave . . . it hurts but it is beautiful . . .(and a part of me is left
behind). . . skip . . . skip . . . a larger surge . . . hurts terribly
all through me, but so beautiful, so exquisitely beautiful . . .
nothing can be so magnificent as this . . .
(I lose another part of what I was). . . skip . . . another surge . . .
nothing can hurt so deeply . . . nothing can be so all-encompassing in
joy . . .but I can't stand much more . . .(not much of the old me
left). . . skip . . . the greatest surge . . . this is it, this is it .
. . there is nothing greater, than what I feel, nothing so total, total
joy, total beauty, total . . . What? Why did I wake up this way? I need
to put my consciousness back together . . . There, that's more like it!
211
Now, what happened? Yes, the dream. Dream (the Hologram)? Or did I live
it? Was it real—or someone else's dream (the Hologram)?
. . . Now everything is in place and operating . . . the dream (the
Hologram) is fading quickly . . . something about clouds and curls . .
. and moving along an Interstate . . . and life and death, whatever
that means . . . something called time-space . . . and a blue Planet .
. . a Sun . . . strange, strong energy . . . millions of Suns . . . and
Love . . . never forget the feeling of that even if it was only a dream
(the Hologram). . . a complicated dream (the Hologram). . . took so
much energy to wake up . . .here in this bright coolness . . . What a
strange place to wake up in. I didn't go to sleep here. How did I fall
asleep? I'd better get back where I belong . . . the Flow, look at the
Flow . . . all moving in the same direction, from all dimensions . . .
must join in before I fall asleep again . . . the dream (the Hologram).
. . parts keep coming back . . . must stay moving with the others . . .
but they are all so much larger, than I am . . . I'm just a speck . . .
so small . . .
You are indeed, little one. Stay with me. I will help you.
. . . the one next to me, yes . . . so big I cannot see it all . . . a
strong surge of energy coming down to me . . .good, that does help . .
. my consciousness is filling out more . . . remembering how it
happened . . . yes . . .was part of the Whole (the Source of All Suns!
LM) . . .
212
one by one, parts were placed here and there, taken from the
Whole and placed . . .where? Can't see it clearly . . . the excitement
. . . joy at a new adventure . . . one by one, those around me were
placed . . . then it was my moment . . . the wrenching . . . the
uncertainty . . . then the Whole (the Source) was gone . . .what
terrible loneliness . . . alone . . . need to get back to the Whole
(the Source) . . . consciousness falling apart . . . fall asleep . . .
sleep . . . what is sleep? . . . losing consciousness, falling apart .
. . that was it . . . Now I am moving back . . . back to the Whole (the
Source) , where I belong. I can feel the beginning of the radiation,
becoming more intense as we move . . . what joy to return . . .
What gifts do you bring, little one? I perceive none. . .
Gifts? Gifts? I have only the need to return to the Whole where I
belong, where there are others like me . . . I am what I have always
been . . . Gifts? That means more than I am or was . . . there is
nothing more . . . only the dream . . .
There is something different with you. You bring no Gifts and you are
alone. You are incomplete.
. . . Incomplete? How can that be? I am the same as when I left the
Whole (the Source). . . I will be complete when I return . . . I do not
understand . . . all I need do is return . . .
213
You do understand, but you have covered it over. We have reached under
the covering. Let us help you remember how it began.
. . . What? Not the dream but connected to it . . . before the dream
(the Hologram) began. It was good, but the Whole needed more . . . and
the Whole is . . . yes, that is when it happened . . . the Whole
distributing parts to grow . . . to reproduce . . . to add to the Whole
. . . is that it? Then the Gifts would be more of me . . . ? It has to
do with the dream (the Hologram). . . something in it, or the entire
dream (the Hologram) . . . must open my memory of the point when I was
not conscious here . . .careful . . . don't want to splinter my
consciousness again . . .
That cannot happen. It will be a blending of what you are now with the
awareness of what you call the dream (the Hologram). It is the total of
that experience, which is your Gift. You will understand why you are
incomplete, why you are small. Observe.
. . . the memory of the dream opens up, and the awakening . . . but now
I am the observer . . . trying to move upstream . . . before . . . a
flash of light energy as I was inserted into the play of KT-95 . . .
the boredom . . . the curiosity . . . departure . . . a lonely
migration, seeking, seeking . . . bright suns of energy in endless
array (an orderly arrangement) . . .joining others like me in the
search . . . search for what? It is inexpressible . . . then the
radiation of a blue Planet satellite of a yellow Sun . . . entry . . .
entry to become what?
214
Human . . . yes, human! It is very real even as I observe it. Moving
into a physical being composed of distorted energy . . . physical
matter, energy locked into limited expression . . . the heavy feeling
of that limitation, yet the inborn drive to maintain energy in the
physical matter and keep it operating . . . a very wonderful yet
contradictory design. Next comes the need to search being converted
into acts and reactions in another modality . . . not succeeding in
this maintenance and trying again and again . . . so many passages in
and out, from the first small creature with the furry face . . . the
rise and fall of awareness and intellect again and again through
millennia of passages . . . lifetimes . . .the sum of all these are the
Gifts brought back to the Whole, but I do not have them with me . . .
now I see the reason for the distribution of parts . . . what Gifts I
have from the dream (the Hologram) ! And I am . . . I am all of those
life passages, all of them. What did I call the Total . . . the I-There
of me. But I am only a part of that . . .
That is why you are small and incomplete. There is more.
Yes . . . others, who are waiting . . . clusters of other I-Theres. We
go as a unit . . . yes . . . So in the dream (the Hologram) I was an .
. . an advance agent . . . a scout . . .
When all have been assembled you will come with your Gifts. You will no
longer be small, but much as we are. All of the others will come with
you.
215
Was your process the same? Did one part of you come here first?
With us it was different. You act as you do because your
diversification is so wide. On our Planet, our entire species became
aware and made the Shift as One.
Why . . . why are we stopping?
The Aperture is just ahead. It will open soon. Beside it you can
perceive the Emitter for the energy beam that creates what you call the
dream (the Hologram).
The dream . . . The Hologram would be a better term . . . The Energy is
very strong . . . a flaming Ball of Energy . . . There is a function I
have to perform . . . The Emitter reminds me . . . I need to do this .
. .
We understand, friend. Go.
. . . There they come, two figures, one glowing more than the other . .
. I move closer to the Emitter, very close . . . I shield them from the
energy of the Emitter . . . opening my receptors to help in the
shielding . . . and I remember the two parts of me there in the dream
(the Hologram). . . and I feel the full effects of the radiation, but
now I can absorb it where they could not . . . I bathe in the radiation
. . . filling, absorbing .. . how much more . . . how much . . . Yes,
now I know what I am, what I have been from the beginning, what I
always will be . . . a part of the Whole, the restless part,
that desires to return,
216
yet lives to seek expression in doing, creating, building, giving,
growing, leaving more, than it takes, and, above all, desires to bring
back Gifts of Love to the Whole. . . the paradox of total unity and the
continuity of the part. I know the Whole . . . I am the Whole. . . even
as a part, I am the Totality . . . The parts of me from the dream
retreat and I move back, remembering the dream well, and what I must do
. . .
You have grown somewhat, little one.
There is something—I remember something I have to do . . . for us. What
happens when we enter and rejoin the Whole?
There is much speculation about that. We can give you a ROTE describing
one probable result. It will be interesting to you when you return to
the dream . . . to the Hologram.
When I return? I have to go back to the dream? To lose consciousness
again?
You have no choice. You are incomplete. But this consciousness will
return with you. You would not abandon those, who are waiting, even if
it were possible.
That is so.
Take this ROTE. It may help you to be patient, you and the sum of you.
217
I am sure it will. But I . . . we . . . need so much to know what it is
to become complete. Can you say?
We know this well. It can be said in your words.
There is no beginning, there is no end,
There is only change.
There is no teacher, there is no student,
There is only remembering.
There is no good, there is no evil,
There is only expression.
There is no union, there is no sharing,
There is only one.
There is no joy, there is no sadness,
There is only love.
There is no greater, there is no lesser,
There is only balance.
There is no stasis, there is no entropy,
There is only motion.
There is no wakefulness, there is no sleep,
There is only being.
There is no limit, there is no chance,
There is only a plan.
This is as we know it to be.
Thank you. I accept this.
You need to move through the other half of the circle to complete your
journey!
218
The other half of the circle?
It is much easier. Goodbye, little one.
Driven by a glorious need to effect completion, I begin the return. The
Flow stops behind me, waiting to enter. Just the flicker of a thought
of entering brings great anticipation. . . Back to the dream . . . go
back to the dream . . .How did I get here? What did I do? Memory begins
to filter in . . . moving upstream against the energy, using the skip
technique of the curl children . . . How do I start it? Yes . . .
downstream should be easy . . . use the regular skip I knew so well ,
as a child in the dream . . . skip . . .skip . . . and instantly back
through the narrow slit . . . a blur of curls playing . . . stop just
outside the rainbow clouds . . . how far away it was when I lay there,
starting to speculate . . . now the flood of memory returns, the I-Here
of me . . . the rest is easy . . . just phase shifting . . . back up
the Interstate, once so hard, now so easy . . . a blur of images and
vibrations . . . I have the final ROTE . . . a wave of laughter and
relief . . . the Fellow Traveler understood me . . . he knew how
impatient I was! There is still fun . . . and yet I know the ultimate .
. . unbelievable, yet it happened . . . a strange, bright knowing,
being in the dream, knowing what it is and having the emotions of the
dream . . . yet I am still awake, pulsating with what I am beyond the
dream. Can there be any way to express that wave form in the dream
without disturbing the illusion?
219
Or is the design exactly that, to disturb the dream . . .So I have to
make one more run, to the other end of the Circle. I know what it is .
. . to move the other way on the Interstate, not out, but in. If I use
my quick-switch phasing and the skip, both of them . . . and I move
swiftly in . . . past the I-There clusters . . . they are gone . . .
past the Belief System Territories . . . they wink out . . . past the
blue Planet . . . and watch as it reverts to a ring of dust . . .
everything moves, everything moves . . . going against the Flow again,
following back to where it began . . . a huge flower of particles and
light folding back together . . . back into a Beam . . .a Beam . . .
get into it, move with it . . . can I stand it? It is so strong . . .
and there it is . . . the Emitter! No, there was no Big Bang . . . it
came from the Emitter . . . the creation of the Hologram . . . and
there it is, the return Flow off to one side . . . a Cycle . . . a
closed Loop . . . a Circle! Now I know . . . now I know!
. . . I had better get back, back to the I-There of me . . . let them
know . . . easy and quick . . . quick-switch and skip . . .
Ram, is that you?
It is. Your scout is back.
Control your radiation! You're burning us out!
220
Oh, sorry. Is that better?
When you broke the uplink, we did not know if you would come back. But
you have! Now we can act. But first you had better . . .
I have it! I have what you need!
Stop and listen, will you?
What is it?
You must move back into your physical body. Now.
Why? Is something wrong?
We have been trying to send a thought to you. When your uplink broke,
it also cut you off from your physical body. If you do not move back
quickly, you may lose it. It is not yet the right time.
. . . If they were concerned, so was I! They gave me a surge of energy
as I began a rapid shift back to the physical phase. The body was
shocked, and I was shocked—it was so cold, the blood pressure very low,
the pulse rate slow, the heart near fibrillation. As I started the
breathing again, deeply, the body began slowly to warm up, to move back
to normal, but the muscles were stiff . . . it would take several days
to get them back into reasonable operation . . .
221
It did indeed take several days. The physical body eventually returned
to reasonable operation. The essence of me, however, did not. There was
not simply a Different Overview, but a remembering of unlimited
freedom, an ever so slight glimpse of an Ultimate Option. And I knew
that I had the missing Basic!
At least I now have tears I can shed, cheeks down which they can roll,
and a loving hand to brush them away. As for the Gifts—when the time is
right, I can take them with me. It may become harder and harder to stay
here. The wanderer cannot wait forever. And yet, I look around me. At
the magnificent design, at the wonderfully engineered reduction of
ideas into practical application. At how living mechanisms modify to
changes in ambience. I look at the leaf of a tree, flexible enough to
withstand changes in wind pressure, guyed and ribbed on the underside
so that it always returns upward-facing, performing the function of a
transducer. I look at the kitten explorer, who learns more in a week
than in the rest of her lifetime, who learns how to use her built-in
calculator that measures the distance from floor to table and triggers
the exact amount of energy that enables her to leap five times her
height and land safely on the table. My awareness reaches out to the
land, air, and sea which act in profound symbiosis to provide
everything, that is needed for millions—no, billions—of life-forms that
inhabit this place. Which came first, the need or the idea? And there
is the added layer on my brain that gave me the chance to
think instead of merely exist. To be what I am. Was that planned in the
design—or an experiment to observe the effect? Or was there another
reason not yet understood? Chaos, organization, variables—they are all
one and the same. Even if it all can be replicated eventually, I would
like to meet the
Original Designer. Once.
16
- The Roadside View
223
It took me many weeks of contemplation to recover from the deep run
along the Interstate. Yet to call it "along the Interstate" is only
partially correct. I had to make a turn in another direction to reach
my destination. "Recover" is another misnomer. I certainly did not
recover—nor will I, ever. The change is permanent. I have no idea how
many other humans have had the same experience and returned to tell
about it. Each report would be colored by the individual and the
civilization and era in which it took place. This was so with me. And
words and analytical synthesis are inadequate to convey the whole
meaning and validity of the experience.
The Basic—the missing Basic—was now a Known to me. Not a belief, hope,
or faith; not conveyed by intuition or emotion; but a Known firmly
fixed in my mind-consciousness. Indeed, it had been there all along,
but I had failed to recognize the many patterns of evidence for what
they were. Acceptance is not the same as Knowing. So . . . the Known
Basic. The physical universe, including the whole of humankind, is an
ongoing creative process. There is indeed a Creator. Who or what this
Creator is lies beyond the Emitter and the Aperture, and I have not
been there. Therefore, that part I do not know. Not yet. All I have is
the overwhelming experience in the ray near the Emitter, and of the
evolving creative process as it takes place in this world and in
myself. This I perceive with my Different Overview. The human
mind-consciousness has speculated for aeons as to our Creator beyond
that Aperture. I have not been able to engage in this for reasons I now
recognize. Because of the continuing use of the label of "God" in a
myriad variations, I had resisted any attempt at identification in any
descriptive form. The discoloration and misconceptions would be too
great. Now I know why I had resisted. The same applies to the word
"spiritual" and many other commonly used terms. These to me are Knowns:
This, our Creator (means - Suns in the Source of All Suns, LM):
• is beyond our comprehension as long as we remain human • is the
designer of the ongoing process of which we are a part • has a purpose
for such action beyond our ability to understand • makes adjustments,
fine tuning, in this process as needed - establishes simple laws that
apply to everyone and everything • does not demand worship, adoration,
or recognition • does not punish for "evil" and "misdeeds"• does not
intercede or interdict in our life activity.
The desire to return with gifts is an integral part of the design. Most
important, I realized that no words I could write or speak, no music I
could compose, would be able to transfer fully such Knowing to another
human mind. As a belief it might be possible, but not as a Known. This
could come only through direct individual experience. How to provide
this was the essential item. Then I became aware that the process of
transfer was two-thirds completed—in place and operating within the
learning system we had devised at our Institute. First I had to
ascertain why there was a need to help this transfer to others. I
recalled my meeting with the nameless great being near the Aperture. I
was incomplete, I had been told. I was too "small." There was not
"enough" of me. And I knew nothing of the "gifts" that were to
accompany me through the Aperture. I remembered the human civilization
of thousands of years ago, that I
had visited. They were more, than a million in number; they had
received
their Signal and were preparing to depart, as a completed unit. I
remembered too the sudden "winking out"—the disappearance of hundreds
of thousands of assembled humans, no longer in a physical state, in the
nearby I-There clusters, bonded together. Lastly I remembered the visit
I made a few years ago, when I traveled some fifteen hundred years into
the future to a nonphysical human civilization, of which I was a part.
They—or we—were on the verge of departure, as a unified whole. My visit
was some form of final closure, they had been waiting for, which I did
not then understand. I understand now. Also
I understand, what "small"
meant, why I was "incomplete," and what the "gifts" were. I know why, I
became involved in the "retrieval" process of those, who
had left the physical. And I understand why I felt the need to
share my
experiences through books and writing, why I put all my physical assets
and years of personal effort into the development of learning systems,
so that others could achieve states of consciousness similar to those I
had experienced. It was not ego gratification; I had no desire to
become a guru or "spiritual" leader. It was not fame; my other life
activities had taken care of that. It was not fortune; I had done well
enough in this respect long before my first OBE. Nor was it the many
personalities of me in the I-There of me. Individually they were as
unknowing, as I. They were simply part of the mosaic. It was the Basic;
the collection and unification of the "parts," not only the errant and
missing ones in my own I-There, but the parts of the entire I-There
cluster to which I am bonded. I have no idea how many others are in the
cluster.
226
It may be thousands or hundreds of thousands. Why is there this need
for total unification? So that we can become truly One. Complete, and
with a multitude of gifts of experience and love. Then we as a totality
can wink out and pass through the Aperture. And what then? The answer
is unknown.
The schedule for this Earth departure is apparently in the thirty-fifth
century. But we cannot leave until we have gathered back all of the
parts of each I-There in our cluster—a massive task. So we shall be in
the retrieval mode as needed, as parts of us drop out of the physical
bewildered and uncertain, or fall through a crack in a belief system
that has held them entrapped for so long. My role, I could see, was
that of a facilitator. The Basic needed to be incorporated into our
activities and learning systems. I had been unaware of what we had been
leading up to. I was unaware also of the probability that within our
methods and
techniques to improve human consciousness there was some kind of Signal
that may have alerted and attracted those who are from their own
I-There bonded within our cluster. I wondered how many of the thousands
who had participated in our programs belong to our particular cluster.
There is no way of knowing, yet.
For more, than fifteen years our programs have been providing working
knowledge of human consciousness up to the very edge of time-space. The
move beyond this border to begin gathering knowledge of the Basic was
indeed an ultimate challenge. The problem was how to do this
cleanly and clearly, to make the Basic a Known instead of a belief.
This could only happen through personal experience. I had to start with
Knowns. What I have called the entry ramps to the
Interstate is physical death as perceived by most Human Minds. These
ramps lead past the edge of their Known map, and the road signs are
contradictory. Culturally, we know very little about death and beyond
at this time. We may believe different premises and prospects, but that
is not Knowing. The only thing that we all do know is that physical
death is going to happen to each of us and to those we love sooner or
later. But that is all, and hence comes the fear. To compound the
situation, virtually all of our knowledge and scientific study are
focused upon physical matter and time-space. Our insatiable dream is to
know all about Here without exception or omission. The origin of this
compulsion goes back to the human struggle to exist in a hostile
environment, driven by the directive to survive. This underlying motive
is still present, even though heavily disguised. In the matter of
physical death, our sciences can provide only those approaches that
somehow relate to physical matter. Specifically we are looking at a
system of measurement of Something. If there is no electrical signal in
the brain, if there is no chemical action, if there is no physical
movement, then you have Nothing. So death equals Nothing. And if you
ask whether the Human Mind disappears when the electrochemical reaction
ceases, much like the magnetic field around an electromagnet when the
electricity is shut off, you will almost
certainly receive a positive answer.
228
But, you may continue, such
magnetic fields don't really disappear, because they leave measurable
imprints on sensitive matter in or near them—so what about the mind?
Of course, comes the scientific reply, humans do much the same; they
live in the memory of their remaining loved ones or in the physical
artifacts they caused to be formed—their work, their books, buildings,
and so on. But that is all. It is easy to see why so many scientists
and medical professionals are nihilist or atheist in their public
stance. But even so, many are forced into a belief image of survival
owing to cultural pressure or hidden hopes and guilts. Moreover,
scientific and medical researchers are inadvertent participants in the
Earth Life System predator process. As such, they are prone to adjust
their data to suit their needs as much as anyone else. Nevertheless,
some of our greatest scientists have deduced that we are more than our
physical bodies, or at least that our mind is more than the output of
our brain. The bulk of our scientific knowledge is not germane to any
approach that tries to make Something out of Nothing, and so we must
reluctantly set it aside. Scientific endeavor is almost wholly enmeshed
in the Earth Life System and physical time-space, and very little is
applicable in this arena. Nor do religions and philosophies provide us
with much help. For thousands of years men of religion in particular
have been trying to persuade us to believe in subsequent-to-death
existence. A vast number of techniques have been utilized in the
attempt to help followers into the Knowing stage, but very few, if
indeed any, have succeeded. So we come back to personal experience. If
it were possible to cross the border, to visit the area of so-called
Nothing and return, and to describe it as it is in clear terms
uninhibited by belief systems, then this would in time lead to
worldwide Knowing and consequently the elimination of fear. But so far
we do not know how to do this. Yet there is the possibility that we are
already doing it— and we simply don't remember. If I knew with no trace
of doubt what I would be and do after I died,
it would change me radically. I could live my physical life to the
fullest, without the shadow lurking behind every second, the shadow
that says one wrong move and your time is up'. If we knew that each of
us had the option to depart when we were certain our physical future
held no more light for us, how our lives would be transformed! If we
had the assurance that, no matter what happens, we can continue our
love bonding beyond the Earth Life System and time-space, if we were
certain, that when a loved one departs we would know beyond doubt where
we can find him or her—what a wonderful freedom we would have!
17
- More Work in Progress
230
Having reviewed as best as I could the very little that was available
on the subject of life beyond in the Earth Life System data, I decided
that reversion to a personal inventory was the only way. What I was
seeking had become a kind of death insurance, and personal
circumstances now indicated that the need for this was pressing. My
Core Self told me it was not as difficult as I seemed to think it was
and with this in mind I began my search. There was a small group of
those, whom I knew well that I had actually
contacted, after their physical exit, during an out-of-body experience.
This group included my father, who died after a year of incoherent
suffering as a result of a stroke. I had found him in a small room with
one window, apparently recuperating, and he had extended warm
greetings. There were also an engineer friend, Charlie, who died after
a heart attack and whom I discovered in a cabin on an ocean shore; my
pilot and research friend, Agnew, whom I met months after his fatal
plane crash in what appeared to be a research laboratory, very excited
about a new project; and Dick, my MD friend, who died from abdominal
cancer and whom I found looking younger and fit talking with two other
men in what seemed an office. I also briefly met my mother, although
this was not during an OBE. She appeared in the front passenger seat of
my car as I was driving to work, just a few minutes after she died in
an Ohio hospital. There were others, but none I knew as well as these.
As I traced what they were . . . as I knew them, an interesting fact
emerged. Not one had been locked into a postmortem belief system. But
where had they gone and how did they get there? After all those years I
had not taken the trouble to find out. While considering this, I came
to realize how very few wrought-in-steel belief systems my parents had
forced on me. There had been no fire and brimstone, no devils or
angels, no preaching about an afterlife; only the process of
self-determination. Neither they, nor I at the time realized how
valuable their attitude was. During nightly runs I began the search to
discover what had happened to those I had met after their Earth Life
System sojourn. About three in the morning, after two sleep cycles, I
was fully rested and relaxed. I rolled out and with a thought I was in
the blackness outside and near my physical body. It took a moment to
home in on the edge of the H Band. Backing away from the H Band Noise,
I began to look for those who had not possessed a strong postmortem
belief system. Charlie came first to mind, and with a light
quick-switch focus I was in his self-created nonphysical cabin by the
ocean.
232
It was like being in a still picture. The sandy beach appeared normal
but the cabin was empty. The clouds were immobile in the sky and the
sun seemed stationary. There was no ocean breeze. Charlie was gone. If
he had been there, everything would have been in motion. Then I noticed
what to me was an anomaly. I could feel sand under my feet. I looked
down. My feet were there—bare feet. I wiggled my toes and dug them in
the sand. It was altogether natural. To one side was a stretch of
grass. I walked, not floated, over to the grass and stepped on it. It
felt just like real grass. I bent down and plucked a blade, belatedly
realizing I also had a hand. I put the grass in my mouth and chewed.
The taste and texture were real. It was indeed grass, living and
growing. The Charlie I knew never indicated he could create living
organisms. Yet here was the evidence. And there was my automatic
assumption of a physical form, which was unusual to say the least. What
kind of energy field had Charlie generated? It was certainly not a
belief system, as I had not been conditioned to expect what I found. As
I left, slowly and deliberately, my sense of a physical body faded. I
checked the "location" and found it was just inside the H Band Noise
barrier, within the human radiation band of the (M) Field spectrum. In
the following weeks I tried to discover where Charlie had gone. Try as
I might, I could find no trace of him anywhere. The next person I
sought was my father. Owing to the stroke, he had suffered very deep
pain for a full year and had been unable to communicate his
problem before he died. I discovered this when I found him previously,
soon after his death. It was easy for me to find the room where he had
been recuperating, but, as I half-expected, he was not there. The room
was empty. But I could reach out and touch the wall with my hand. Why
did I suddenly materialize my hand? The wall was rough, like concrete
or adobe. The father I knew could not have built it. So either I didn't
know my father as well as I thought I did, or someone else created the
room. As I moved slowly out of the top of the small building,
my perception changed back to purely nonphysical. I was not surprised
that the H Band Noise wave was not far away. Later I tried but failed
to find where my father was. Had both he and Charlie returned to the
Earth Life System? Or had their I-There retrievers picked them up? And
what was this place where both cabin and room stood empty since their
departure?
As I felt before, it was too real for a belief system. My curiosity was
on the alert.
I made another run some days later into an adjacent area that brought a
similar result. I rediscovered the place where I had found Agnew
several months after he had crashed and burned in his light aircraft
while trying to land at a small Ohio airport. It was at Agnew's funeral
in North Carolina where a vivid and hitherto unexplained event had
happened. Just as his casket was being lowered into the grave, a
low-flying Twin Beech aircraft flew over the site. It was exactly the
same model, with the same color and markings, as the one Agnew had
flown. It waggled its wings and flew off into the distance.
His widow broke into sobs and all of us who knew him were moved to
tears.
234
Later we checked all airports within a radius of three hundred miles.
There were no records of any Twin Beech takeoffs or landings. With this
in mind, I was not optimistic that I would find this creative type at
the same nonphysical site. When I had found him previously, soon after
his death, he had been working excitedly on something he couldn't
explain to me. I was right. This time the platform and rigging were
there, but not Agnew. I didn't try to locate him; there were too many
possibilities.
Next I focused on where I had found Dick after his death. He had been a
good doctor and friend in my early days in New York. When I had seen
him, he had been in deep conversation with several other men in a large
room, and he had simply given me a wave of acknowledgment. He had
looked half the age he was when he had died.
I reached this same large room with no problem. To my surprise, it was
not empty. Two normal-looking men in business suits were standing by a
table in casual conversation. I approached them carefully.
"Excuse me, but could you give me any information about Dick Gordon?"
They turned and stared at me wide-eyed. Then the taller one spoke.
"I'm sorry, we weren't expecting you. Do you need to sit down? Are you
tired?"
"No, I'm fine. I only want . . ."
"Wait a moment, George," the second man interrupted.
"This one's different. Look!" They examined me intently.
George shook his head.
"You still have a living physical body?"
I hesitated. "Well, yes, I do. But . . ."
"And you know you're not dreaming?"
"Yes, I know. I'm trying to . . ."
"Amazing!" George reached out, grabbed my hand, and shook it
vigorously. "I've heard about people like you but you're the first
we've met! What about this, Fred?"
"But . . . exactly what is this place?"
It was Fred who replied. "This is a place where certain people come
when they've died. With a little help sometimes.
Most of them don't know it exists."
"What people?"
"Medical types. Physicians, surgeons, and so on."
"Why do they come here?"
"To calm down after the big change," George explained.
"They need it especially because they have been so locked in to keeping
patients alive. But they recover quickly in a familiar environment.
Look around."
I became aware that I was in a typical doctor's office—
waiting room, with chairs, coffee tables, and stacks of old magazines.
Through a glass window I could see the nurse's desk and file cabinets.
An inner office with desk and chairs was visible through an open
doorway, and on the far side of this I glimpsed a room with examining
table, scales, and other equipment.
I turned to the two men. "Who put this together? Did you?"
"We don't know," Fred replied. "It was here when we 236
Ultimate Journey arrived. It's an artifact created simply to help the
medical mind adjust to the change. It's so familiar. That's why it
works."
"Are you the only ones here?"
"There are several hundred at least, just in the receiving area. They
are the ones that stay and help. They come and go all the time."
I turned to George. "How did you get here?"
"Well, I was sitting in the Park, and Fred here came up and sat beside
me, and then . . . What's the matter? Are you all right?"
He must have seen the shock on my face as the wave of memory flowed
into me. The Park! Years ago, I had arrived at the Park. But how or why
I got there I could not recall. There had been a welcoming group of ten
or twelve men and women, who greeted me warmly and explained where I
was.
It was a place to calm down in after the trauma of physical death—a way
station, for relaxation and decision as to what to do next. The Park!
Finally I managed to speak. "I'm fine. Tell me . . .
where is this Park?"
It was Fred who answered. There was a softness in his face as he looked
at me.
"That is what you are looking for, isn't it?"
"I don't know. But I think it is."
He waved his arm at the door behind him. "Just go out,
turn left, and follow the path through the woods. It's not far."
I was deeply grateful. "Thank you—thank you both. I may see you again,
even if I'm not a doctor." George patted my shoulder. "Come
back when you get a chance. If you find a lonely physician, bring him
along too."
I went outside, turned left, and there indeed was a woods with tall
trees, most of them familiar to me. A path led through an opening, and
I followed it. Although I was eager to hurry, I decided to remain
walking. The feel of the leaves and grass against the soles of my feet
was much too good. My feet were bare!
As I walked on, a gentle breeze touched my head and chest. I could
feel! Just as with my bare feet, I could feel. I passed oaks, poplars,
hickories, sycamores, chestnuts, pines,
and cedars, even an incongruous palm tree, and trees I never knew
existed. The scent of the blooms mixed with that of rich loam was
wonderful. I could smell! And the birds—about half of them were species
I had never seen before!
They were singing, chirping, calling, flying from tree to tree and
sweeping across my path. Hundreds of them. And I could hear!
I walked more slowly in wonderment. My hand—yes, my physical hand
again—reached out and plucked a leaf from the low
branch of a maple. It felt alive and flexible. I put it in my mouth and
chewed. It was moist, and tasted exactly like the maple leaves of my
childhood. Suddenly, I knew, what had happened—what was probably still
taking place.
This was a human creation! Many of those, who walked this path created
and added their own favorite bird or tree to the woods. They were
alive—living creations, created by humans'.
They were not the standard reproductive mode,
followed in the Earth Life System, which is really not human-created, but the
idea and plan of
Someone else.
238
And all the rest of it behind me in my search was the same, the product
of a human mind-consciousness. The medical haven, Agnew's rigging, my
father's recuperation room,
and Charlie's cabin by the ocean. Charlie, I remembered, had even
demonstrated how he put it together! All human creation! The Basic! I
know of the existence of our Creator,
but are all of us really creators out of the same mold? Is my Core Self
I accepted so casually a minuscule replica or clone of the Original?
How far can we take this only partially expressed idea? As if to prove
the point of reality, a large orange parrot flew over my
shoulder, chirped, and released a white dropping in my hand as he
passed. I laughed as I tested the warm consistency of it between thumb
and forefinger. It was certainly real! I walked on, wondering how many
human-created animal friends were in
the woods, when I came to a bend in the path and the trees ended.
Before me was the Park. It was the same, as when I had visited many
years ago, with winding walks, benches, flowers and shrubbery,
different-colored grass lawns, clusters of stately trees, small streams
and
fountains, and with a warm sun overhead among small cumulus clouds. The
Park continued on a gently rolling terrain as far as I could see. As I
walked down the slope to the nearest bench, I wondered, what human mind
or group of humans put this together. It was a magnificent creation for
a lowly human. Yet I knew this was the way it had come into
existence. But I had not thought of such things on my previous visit
those years ago. Now I remembered—
I knew—why it was here. A woman rose from the bench as I approached.
She was of medium height,
slender, with large brown eyes and dark brown, slightly wavy hair down
to her shoulders. Her face was smooth and lightly tanned, with features
that seemed to have touches of the Orient, the Middle East, and Europe.
She was wearing dark slacks and a hip-length jacket. Her age might be
anything between thirty-five and fifty. She was familiar—I had met her
somewhere before. She smiled and held out her hand.
"At last you are here! "Welcome back, Ashaneen."
Ashaneen—my name, remembered from another lifetime. It told me a lot
about her. I took her hand, which was real enough to
feel. She led me to the bench and we sat down.
Other people strolled by, all of them adults, wearing a variety of
clothing. Some glanced curiously at us...I wondered why, until I
realized there was a subtle difference they could perceive between my
appearance and theirs. I caught the woman's eye and she smiled again. A
half-memory floated in.
"This jacket you're wearing . . ."
"I was wearing it last time you were here. I thought it might help you
to remember."
I nodded, but my memory was hazy. She was among the dozen people I met
last time, that I was sure of.
I looked at her and saw that she was smiling. Could she read my
thoughts?
240
Ultimate Journey "Yes, of course I can. And you can read mine."
"Who are you?"
"I am only the messenger. I am to tell you that you may by all means
bring people to us, those who are newly physically dead. We will take
care of them. That is why we are here.
And you may teach others to do this."
"How can I teach something that will seem so strange?"
"We are sure you can. Many of them are probably doing it now. All you
need to do is help them remember. It is a wholly objective way to
remove the fear of physical death."
"And let them know they do survive the death process."
"Certainly."
"Also it would help them become aware of the many options they have."
"There are many even you have not considered,
Ashaneen. Or would you prefer we call you Robert?"
"Robert or Bob, please. My physical friends call me Bob.
The name Ashaneen might trouble them."
"Some may know you by the old name."
"I am becoming aware of that. And I'm trying to recall your name. You
are . . . the wife of . . . Ileon—yes,
Ileon!"
"Mate is a better word."
"You are . . . Nevisse."
"Good."
"Now, I need some help. The places I have visited, where my friends
were—they are simply extensions of here, are they?"
"That is so. But if they have a strong belief, they will
follow that directive and go where that belief leads them.
There will be others of the same belief waiting to help them.
You let them go and leave them alone. That is where they belong."
"But all this . . . this is not just another belief, is it?"
Nevisse laughed. "Not in the usual sense. There are no beliefs
involved, only experience. The design here is only to provide a
familiar surrounding to ease the anxiety."
"This place, then . . . ?"
"Is a creation that is here and will be here whatever your beliefs. It
will not disappear if you don't believe it exists."
"Who made it?"
"A human civilization many thousands of years ago.
They have been gone long since. Is there anything more you need to
know?"
"What about those who simply want—or need—to return to what I have
called their I-There? I'm sure you understand what I mean."
"I do. That is the destination of most who depart from here."
"So, when we bring people here, you calm them down and give them the
opportunity to consider what they want to do next."
"That is so. We show them what opportunities do exist.
The Park is but a starting point. You will be astounded when you see
all of the little individual places that residents have created."
"Are there rules?"
"Only one. No imposition of one will upon another."
242
"Thank you for your help. I have much to do, it seems."
"You will find it easier than you think, Bob."
"This knowledge . . . of here, of where to go at death . . . where to
meet . . . this knowledge before the event . . . it gives ultimate
freedom!"
"It does. I see you are receiving a signal to return."
"Yes . . . There is so much more to learn here . . . But I must go. I
have one more question . . ."
"No need to ask. The creative processes whose results you have observed
are already known to us as human. And your father did construct his own
room."
"There was no need to ask. Ta na sen!"
"You have remembered. A goodbye phrase from one hundred thousand years
ago. Ta na sen!"
The return was easy and uneventful. I did indeed have much to do!
243
The New Direction Now that I knew what had to be done, one further
question arose. How could I organize all that I had experienced into
such a shape that it could be absorbed and put into practice by others?
Not only that: how could those experiences, which for me had stretched
over years, be compressed into a time-frame which others would find
practical and appropriate?
This was not a process that could be established by trial and error,
for what we were shortly to be handling was, quite literally, a matter
of life and death. It had to be as nearly right as possible the first
time. And events in my personal life were telling me that there was
little time to spare. But I was fortunate—or perhaps it was not good
fortune but the fulfillment or completion of a design begun more than
three decades ago when we first commenced research into human
consciousness.
245
For at my disposal I had all the resources of our
Institute, which for many years had shown, that it was possible to
bring
individuals right up to that transitional point between physical life
and death and enable some of them at least to see into the
beyond. That our procedures were safe and that our participants
benefited enormously and in so many ways had been proved beyond doubt.
My left brain told me, that two things were needed. The first was
research into the frequencies of brain waves, translated into sound,
that
would permit the individual mind-consciousness to travel safely beyond
the transitional point and to return, when the task was accomplished.
The second was a program, that would be suitable and effective for the
wide variety of people, who might be attracted by the prospect of
service to those, who are no longer in physical existence. So, with my
closest
colleagues, I set to work. The simplest thing was to find a title for
the program: Lifeline.
The first Lifeline program took place at the Institute during the week
beginning June 22, 1991. In the following fourteen months, some two
hundred people participated in the six-day intensive learning process.
Among those attending were physicians, psychologists, engineers,
researchers, business executives, psychiatrists, writers, attorneys,
educators,
therapists, musicians, and artists. All were graduates of at least one
previous Institute program, as this was a prerequisite for attendance
at Lifeline. Apart from that, they represented widely divergent
backgrounds, interests, lifestyles, and previous experiences with the
exploration of consciousness. Yet at the end of each program almost all
attested to their ability to visit the Reception Center—the Park—and
many also acknowledged, that they now knew for certain, that they would
survive the physical death process.
246
I was indeed surprised. It was clear that the process could be taught.
Following the first session, I had reasoned that the phenomena reported
might possibly have been unique to that particular group. The reports
from the second session might, again possibly, be coincidental. With
the third session, however, it really did seem, as if the process was
viable. Ten sessions later, I
do not see, how there can be any doubt. We have been able to
accomplish,
what we set out to do. Lifeline is designed to be effective without
respect to any specific
belief, held by the individual participant, and to instill knowledge
through direct experience. It is a "Know" system and does not of itself
negate any currently held beliefs, with the possible exception of
nihilism. The program has certain goals. These are:
to release all fears related to the physical death process;
to establish a familiarity with different states of consciousness until
these states become Knowns instead of beliefs;
to generate ongoing communication and relationships with other Human
Minds active in other states of consciousness;
to incorporate such acquired knowledge both consciously and at the
nonconscious level into physical life thought, functions, and activity;
to insure upon the cessation of physical life existence, for whatever
reason, that such knowledgeable human mind-consciousness
will shift without interruption to other forms of existence. The means,
by which these goals are achieved, is by development and
extension of the methods and techniques that have been evolved and
refined at the Institute over many years. One of the hallmarks of these
methods and techniques is the use of the term "Focus level" to indicate
and identify, in a convenient and easily understood way, a particular
state of consciousness. Hitherto, programs had taken participants
through Focus 3 (mind-brain synchrony), Focus 10 (mind awake and alert,
body asleep), Focus 12 (state of expanded awareness), Focus 15 (state
of no time), to Focus 21 (the edge of time-space where it is possible
to contact other energy systems). Now, in pursuit of the program's
theme of service to those who have
died, it was necessary to venture beyond. To help our participants, we
needed to identify in a similar way those
states beyond 21 to which they would be introduced and where they would
be able to act calmly and objectively. We did so as follows:
Focus 22. Where humans still in physical existence have only partial
consciousness. In this state would be those suffering from delirium,
from chemical dependency or alcoholism, or from dementia. It would also
include patients, who were anesthetized or comatose. Experiences here
might be remembered, as dreams or hallucinations.
248
Focus 23. A level inhabited by those, who have recently
left physical existence, but who either have not been able to recognize
and accept this or are unable to free themselves from the ties of the
Earth Life System. It includes those from all periods of time.
Focus 24-26. This covers the Belief System Territories, occupied by
nonphysical humans from all periods and areas, who have accepted and
subscribed to various premises and concepts. These would include
religious and philosophical beliefs, that postulate
some form of post-physical existence.
Focus 27. Here is the site of what we may call the Reception Center or
the Park, which is the hub of it. This is an artificial synthesis,
created by human minds, a way station designed to ease the trauma and
shock of the transition out of physical reality. It takes on the form
of various earth environments, in order to be acceptable to the,
enormously wide, variety of newcomers.
Focus 28. Beyond not only time-space, but human thought. Residence in
28 or beyond limits any return to a physical human body.
Those, who are trained in the Lifeline system, become familiar and
comfortable with these different states. Each individual is invited to
create his own personal and special place within Focus 27, a place, to
which he may return at will. The forms, that these places take, are as
varied and unique, as the participants themselves, ranging for example
from log cabins by quiet streams to clumps of trees, South Sea islands,
palaces of crystal, and corners of one's heart. Return to one's place
in Focus 27 is facilitated by the use of a personal identification
signal code, a self-chosen symbol or representation, which the
individual creates and installs. It functions, as a kind of resonant
homing device, to guide the individual back. Once participants are
familiar with the range of Focus levels, they are
advised, how to assist those, who are no longer in physical existence,
who need
help. They phase gradually into Focus 27 and there they may ask for
help and guidance for themselves. Then they return to Focus 23,
sometimes accompanied by a guide or
helper, where they may be attracted to a situation, in which their
assistance is needed, in order for someone to move onward. It may be,
that the someone refuses to accept the fact of his or her physical
death, or is unwilling to let go, owing to some perceived gain from
continuing to be attached to the physical. The participant seeks to
communicate with this individual, encouraging him to release and move
onward. If this encouragement is successful, as it often is, the two,
perhaps accompanied by the guide, move together toward Focus 27. On the
way, some individuals will slip away into the Belief System Territories
of Focus 24-26, where they will be welcomed by those of their own
particular creed or faith. Others will continue to the Reception Center
in Focus 27, where they may be greeted by loved ones, who are no longer
in physical
existence. Here they have the opportunity to be counseled, as to the
next step to take along the path to growth.
250-251
With regard to this next step, several options are
available to the new arrivals, among them the following:
reunion with loved ones, who have previously made the transition;
communication with those, who are still alive in the physical state;
renewal of contact and return to the Original Self (the I-There);
return to experience another Earth human life;
meeting and discussion with those of the same belief, which may involve
departure to that Belief System Territory;
assuming temporarily the "retrieving" role;
assuming physical life activity in other forms (nonhuman) at other
sites (elsewhere in this universe);
participating in studies and exploration of other phases of the
Consciousness Continuum.
When the decision is made, the individual is free to move along the
chosen path. One further element in the process needs to be mentioned.
Lifeline participants are encouraged to seek as much information, as
they can from the subjects of their retrievals By this are meant
personal details, such as name, age, address or state or country of
origin, date and cause of death (road accident, illness, natural
disaster, warfare, and so on), occupation, and any other details that
may seem relevant. Communication is
generally nonverbal and often by means of a ROTe —a ball of thought.
Where the information received is sufficiently full, it is passed later
to the Lifeline Research Department, which sets a process of
verification or validation in motion. In most instances it has not so
far proved possible to obtain enough of this kind of information to
make the effort worthwhile; this type of formal questioning is often
inappropriate to the circumstances of the retrieval. But on a few
occasions enough information has become available for secure
verification to be made: a person of that name, age, and place died in
that manner at that time. For most participants this does not matter;
they are so convinced of the reality of the process that they are not
concerned about this kind of checking. The Institute, however, feels
that it is important for this to happen, although once twenty or thirty
instances have been verified there would
seem little purpose in looking for more. Participants in the program
sometimes make contact in Focus 23 with
someone they recognize, a relative or friend who died recently and who
recognizes them also. When this happens, there is a noticeable
difference in the "feeling" of the encounter, much like the difference
between walking into a room of strangers and walking into a room, where
one is surprised to find a sister or brother.
252
Recognition is immediate and there is a heightening of the
energy in the
exchanges which follow. More often the participants are drawn to
someone whom they have never met before. It may be someone from a
different culture or epoch of time, of any age, color, or creed. What
surprises many participants, however, is that while they are
engaged in their mission they discover that at the same time they are
retrieving lost parts of themselves. These may appear as past-life
selves who remained in Focus 23. Some are found, who settled in the
Belief System Territories of Focus
24-26 and who had begun, through gradual doubt of the beliefs they once
had held, to "fall through the cracks," as it were, of that particular
system. Others may appear as fragments of current life personalities,
aspects which had fled or been torn away from the Core Self; for
example, child selves who had escaped from the trauma and pain of
physical or emotional abuse in their families and now seek to be
reunited. The guidance that may be requested in Focus 27 manifests,
according to our participants, in many different forms. It
may appear externally or sensed internally; it may be constant through
all the experiences or may change from time to time. Reports include
mention of "a glowing white shape," an individual called "Sam," a
hooded figure who revealed himself as a
famous film star, a little dog, the color blue, a human hand, and
voices saying "we are here." Some participants do not see guidance as
separate from themselves in any way; "guidance and I are one," as one
report says. At this point
I must make it clear that a very large num- ber accept
their transition without difficulty and are not to be found in Focus
23. This number includes those who have prepared themselves beforehand,
or been prepared by others, so that they may easily sever their ties
with the Earth Life System, as
well as those who are strongly fortified by their beliefs. They move
past Focus 23 of their own accord, to Focus 24-26, 27, or beyond. The
denizens of Focus 23 vary as much as humanity itself. Setting aside
those who are known to their "retrievers," they are reported as
originating from anywhere in the world. A few have been "waiting" for
two or three centuries or more, but most have left physical existence
quite recently, during the last
twenty or thirty years. Many of them were victims of accidents or
natural or man-made disasters, and sudden deaths figure frequently. For
the most part they are ready and willing to leave, although some show
concern about loved ones, relatives, or comrades and refuse to depart
until they are reunited or reassured. Reports by participants of those
they have encountered include mentions
of several youngsters killed in road accidents, a forty-five-year-old
man who choked on food, a classical pianist from
Prague who died from AIDS-related complications, a mother and two
children from Cambodia who stepped on a mine, a number
of babies from the Nigerian province of Biafra who starved to death, a
soldier killed in the Gulf War, a stillborn baby from Milwaukee, and a
teenage girl who overdosed on pills. In some instances much detailed
information is gathered: one participant came across a woman born March
22, 1922, died in Ogden, Utah, March 15, 1972, who gave her own name, her
husband's,
the names of her 3 children.
254
Another example is the pianist from
Prague mentioned above, who disclosed his name and age, twenty-eight,
that he lived with his parents, studied at the Conservatoire in Paris,
and died in a hospital. A third involves a fifty-seven-year-old female
graphic designer (name given)
who died in December 1991 of cardiac arrest during bypass surgery at a
hospital in Scottsdale, Arizona.
During the retrieval process participants have no sense of fear and
generally are unaffected by emotion. Exceptions to the latter may occur
when contact is made with a relative or loved one, or with what the
participant realizes is a lost part of himself. The following extract
from a report illustrates this:
"During an experience, I found a small boy three years old in a pool of
light in Focus 23. There were no other people visible except for this
young boy. I felt such emotion, anguish,
and pain at seeing this small child. When I went to take him up, my
guide told me that all the emotion was not necessary. After the guide
and I took the child up, I felt a sense of completion and on some level
a sense of homecoming, as if another piece of me was at rest now. When
the child was led away
by those who would 'process' him, I knew he would be cared for and that
everything was absolutely as it should be. After the tape experience I
felt that things indeed had shifted round. I'm slowly becoming all of
who I am."
(John A. Baylor, Virginia Beach)
Often it is when the participant returns to normal consciousness at the
end of the experience that the emotions flood in. There may be a
delayed response to the shock of meeting a loved one whom you might
have thought never to have seen again, or to the sadness and
desperation of some of those in Focus 23. But as you become more
accustomed to the process, the more natural it seems to be. That this
young child was killed in a
road accident, or that mother died leaving two young children, becomes
somehow acceptable, and the reports contain very few references to
misery or tragedy. In Focus 27, all will be as it should be, and the
only emotion is love.
As I had discovered previously, those who had met with disabling
accidents or illnesses, who had been injured or maimed in some way,
recovered their wholeness when they arrived in Focus 27. One report
referred to a man whose mother had been prescribed the drug thalidomide
during pregnancy and who had been born with only the vestiges of legs.
He had lived for nearly thirty-five years—he was English and the drug
had been introduced into England in 1958. In Focus 23 he was still
deformed; in 27, where he was welcomed by his mother, he was whole and
fit, as he had never been in physical life. Not all those who are
brought out of Focus 23 do arrive at 27—at least,
not immediately. Some move into the Belief System Territories and
others may simply disappear. Perhaps they find that their connections
with Earth are not yet broken, or that they have not yet reached full
acceptance of their state. One participant reported encountering a
girl, who had died in
childbirth. She conveyed to him that her baby had died and she had to
stay to take care of it. Another account referred to an African
boy aged nine, who starved to death in the
desert in October 1990.
256
He would not leave Focus 23 until
he had found
his three younger brothers and his two-year-old sister, who had
predeceased him. On occasions the participant may return and
find the reluctant traveler more willing at the second attempt,
although this happens rarely.
What we could not predict at all was how the participants themselves
would react to the Lifeline experience. We felt it was very unlikely
that there would be any adverse effects,
especially as all participants were well versed in the Institute's
methods, having attended one or usually more courses previously. How
they did react is best told in their own words.
"The program as presented was excellent for me because I was led to
realize how limiting belief systems are and how enclosed we are in
them—mostly without our prior conscious knowledge. It has been a week
of growth and expanding for me in many areas. The very thin phase
between what we know as reality now, here, and there becomes apparent.
Life as a whole has begun to take on a different perspective."
(M. D. Roy, Washington)
"The most important learning, that took place for me in Lifeline, was
the
realization, that I see aspects of myself in others, and the acceptance
and subsequent embracing of those aspects, both positive and negative,
is the retrieval process for me. I feel that unification of my total
self is taking place in this manner." (M.R., Maine) "[The most
important thing I learned was] the experienced objective reality of the
imaginal realm, which I had 'believed'
was only a metaphor for personal issues in need of integration.
The several retrievals were so unexpected and palpable they have forced
an opening through experience (I always thought and behaved as if they
were real) into other realities.
Because this happened in the context of getting my mother into 27 and
cutting the shroud-like bonds to her and my belief systems, it has been
wonderfully disencumbering and gives me a keen awareness of parallel
modes of processing of parallel consciousness. Issues of death and
beyond feel very comfortable now." (S.B.P., New York)
"I learned that 'rescue and retrieval' is not necessarily about
performing a service to others, but rather about performing a service
for ourselves, thus performing for others as well." (K.L., Albuquerque)
"Never before had I felt like I had handled my mother's death. This
week has truly freed me from my emotions surrounding this loss and I
believe it has freed her."
(S.C., Alaska)
"A piece of me now exists in Focus 27. There's no more question in my
mind where I will go when I die and what I will be doing the rest of my
life." (Bill Oakes, Oregon)
"The 'other side,' as it were, does not have to be perceived as a
strange, eerie place beyond imagination, for it is just a phase away. A
shift of perception along with a subtle awareness is all that is
needed." (E.A., California)
258
"I have a new realization of truly being part of a
whole."
(K.S.C., Paris, France)
"I have learned that we can be of service beyond this reality and in
this reality using psychic gifts."
(C.S.Q., Seville, Spain)
One participant expressed very clearly, how she had assimilated the
experience, although during the week she did not retrieve any "others"
from Focus 23:
"Perhaps because I believe, that one cannot give meaningful guidance
without being balanced and whole oneself, I viewed, that Lifeline
process of retrieval as reuniting with aspects of my Total Self, to
which, for one reason or another, I had no conscious access. These
aspects would include past lives or simply powerful emotional thought
forms, that were keeping some of my energy blocked and limiting my
awareness. The definition of the three levels beyond Focus 21 was
highly suitable
to this application, whereby Focus 22 and 23 were a reflection of any
type of turmoil, Focus 24 and 25 were the source of the belief system
or misinformation on which the
confusion was based, and then Focus 27 provided the pure clear light of
one's essence. By going to Focus 27 first and reclaiming my own light,
I was more able to face my own
darkness, than ever before. I feel a new sense of completion, peace,
and harmony. And maybe next time I'll resonate in sufficient
balance to help others who are lost in chaotic thought forms and
darkness."
(Judith Taylor, New Jersey)
259
The Institute has a growing file of participants' accounts of their
retrieval experiences. These are not confined to instances during the
programs. Many find that when they return home they are able to
continue with the process, usually during sleep. And there are some who
were involved in the process before joining the program—and there may
be many more who have also been involved but do not remember. These
accounts make a fascinating collection, much of it highly
poignant and moving. Outside the context of the program itself, many of
the reports may seem to stretch into the realms of fantasy. But it is
impossible to convince those who experienced these events that they
were anything but absolutely real. The following extract from the files
comes from a participant in one of
the earliest programs:
"I picked up my helper in Focus 27 and went to 23 to wait. Just when I
was about to give up finding anyone, a little Irish lady looked up at
me and said, 'Wait . . . wait! Don't you go back without me!' She
immediately jumped into my vehicle (a double pyramid emerald) and
talked all the way to 27. When we arrived and stepped out into the Park
she told me her name was Elizabeth McGowan (or McCowan). She was well
aware that her physical life was over and she had been waiting for me
to take her to her husband and daughter,
who were already in 27 to meet her when she arrived. She said she was
from County Cork, and corrected me when I referred to it as Cork
County. Her death occurred in 1919
and she had been a seamstress. Her husband was Richard and her
daughter, who appeared to be about thirteen, was Amy. Before I could find out any
more, they all
disappeared.
260
"I was trying to decide what to do next when my father appeared. This
was unexpected and very emotional for me, as he and I had not resolved
a lot of issues when he died in 1985. He
had spent eight years drinking heavily after my mother died. I tried to
support him as best I could for five years, but felt he was going to
destroy me. I had no contact with him for the last three years of his
life.
"When he appeared, I went through a range of emotions, the strongest
being love, guilt, and sadness that I could not stay with
him. He did, however, give me a gift. When I asked if we could stay
together, he replied, 'I love you, but you need to remember why you
came here, and never forget your focus.' At this point, Bob told us to
leave 27. I left with very mixed
emotions, but realized that my father had given me forgiveness,
freedom, and love. What more could I ask for?"
(Jim Greene, Arlington, Virginia)
Another file report demonstrates a fascinating connection between
events in Focus 23-27 and an episode in the participant's earlier life
when he was a hospital intern.
"In my first attempt at retrieving I met a little girl at Focus 23 who
was about eleven years old. She said she had recently died of leukemia
at a hospital in Ohio. I explained to her that I was there to help her
in her transition to another level. She seemed to understand and trust
me, and she stretched out her arms to reach toward me. I did the same,
and as we hugged I suddenly experienced an overwhelming feeling of love
that engulfed my whole body. It was a feeling I have
experienced only a few treasured times in my life.
"Soon we were travelling, moving toward Focus 27. As I hugged her again
and said goodbye at 27, this feeling of love returned for a few brief
moments.
"I never checked to see if the name and address she gave me were real.
The experience was real and meaningful beyond measure. I understood
shortly thereafter that I had been given the opportunity to complete an
episode in my life which had been unresolved for twenty-five years. It
began when I was a medical student. I had befriended a little girl with
leukemia. She was in and out of the hospital repeatedly during the
three years I knew her.
"At the end of one very busy Sunday afternoon during my pediatric
internship, I was writing orders in charts when she came in and asked
if she could talk to me. I told her I couldn't at the moment because I
was busy, but maybe later. 270She went back to her room alone.
"But she could not wait for me. Shortly thereafter, one of the nurses
came to tell me that the little girl had been found lying in her bed in
her room. She was dead. Had I taken just a few moments, I could have
helped her in the transition that she knew was coming.
"Finally, twenty-five years later, I was given another opportunity."
(A. L. Dablberg, M.D., Ph.D., Providence, Rhode Island)
The next report is taken from the transcript of a tape made not in the
Lifeline course itself but during a laboratory session.
262
"It's nighttime and I'm in a boat, approaching a rocky
coast—it might be the west coast of Ireland, or Cornwall. The rocks are
tall and upright, with water slapping against them.
I
might be just above the boat. Ahead there is a cleft or shaft in the
rocks. I'm going into this—I'm not afraid. The walls are black with
wetness shining on them. I'm turning into a tunnel or narrow cave . . .
now I'm in a cave . . .there's light reflected off the rocks so that I
can see . . . I'm going
down—there's a fissure in the roof above . . . There's the little dog
that I've seen before . . ."I've come through a long, narrow tunnel, so
narrow—how could anyone get through here? Now I'm being shown what it's
like
to have the weight of a rock on my chest—it doesn't hurt but it's as
though a big piece of rock is lying across
me. It's showing me what someone would experience if a mine shaft or
something like that collapsed on them . . ."Energy is pouring in . . .
I must relax . . . I'm being shown what
it's like to be trapped in a confined space deep inside a rock
formation . . . It feels as if someone is holding my left hand . . .
there may be somebody there, if I can reach him . . . Yes, his name is
Gregory—he's coming loose from a place he's been stuck in, low down to
my left in the rocks. He's sliding out—he's very relieved to come out.
He didn't think that anyone would find him . . . He's thirtyone years
old . . ."I feel he was climbing on the rocks and the tide came in. He
found the opening, like I did, and went down. I feel that because I
was shown the compression of rock—the weight—that there must have been
a rockfall and he was trapped. "He's still holding my hand. I'm trying
to find out . . .
263
Black—is that his surname? He wants a hug—he's been there a long time .
. . since 1948 . . .
"What shall I do? Take him to the Center? But how do I know . . . ? Fix
the idea of the Center in my mind, extend for it. He'll be comfortable
there and looked after—he understands.
"He's leading me now. He knows where to go. I tell him I love him and
he's free to go . . . he's moving away now . . .
"I'm being taken to a more comfortable place . . . It's strange—when I
asked to be moved after Gregory had left I picked up on the fear he'd
experienced when he entered the cave . . . when he died. It was as
though his fear had permeated the rocks, and after he left the fear
left also—I felt it brush past me, as if I were in its slipstream . . .
Now it's time for me to return . . ."
(Jill Russell, Cambridge, England)
264
Taking Timeout The Variable, my wife Nancy's illness, seemed under
control for the moment. It had indeed forced a new direction,
the beginning of a close understanding of the effect of perhaps the
greatest Variable each human mind-consciousness must face—the
transition from physical life to another energy system we label death.
It was astounding that I had passed over it so casually. I wonder about
the Signal that I may have brought back with me from my
exploration. If it is there,
I cannot perceive any result. Did the
thousands of human I-There units bonded to our cluster receive the
Signal? I am sure some in my own I-There will know. At least it will be
fun playing the INSPEC role. Yet all of this slipped into the
background.
265
A Song for the Unsung It was the end of hospital visiting hours. In
Nancy's room, I bent over and kissed her forehead. "Are you sleepy?"
"Mmmmmm."
"You look better tonight."
"Mmmmm. I'm fine."
"Want to go play later?"
"In, in 27?"
"For starters."
"Mmmm, yes."
"I'll see you later."
"I love you."
"I love you!"
At around eight in the evening, we received an urgent call from the
hospital, and were at her bedside by nine. It had been extremely
devastating for me to visit her in the hospital before this for several
reasons. Now it was different. Her arms and hands were limp and cold,
and she
was breathing in short, deep gasps followed by a long pause. But it was
looking into her unblinking eyes that told me. Nancy was no longer
there. At twelve-fifteen in the morning, her body finally stopped
breathing. Later, the Lifeline team reported:
they had taken her to 27 sometime between seven-thirty and eight, and
that she was safe and
warmly greeted there. This was approximately the time the hospital
noted the beginning of her terminal breathing (the medical people call
it Cbene-Stokes). It was later, that I realized such breathing was
familiar to me.
266
It was the same breathing, that I heard, when the old
man was dying in
the St. Louis flophouse back, when I was a vagrant teenager. The same
breathing
I heard, when my favorite cabin cat Fusby died of leukemia, while lying
in my arms, three days before Nancy's exit. I was shocked, how
unprepared I truly was. The biggest glitch/Variable
in my life, I saw it coming, plenty of portents, all the backup
experience, and still . . .Hundreds, no, thousands knew/know her for
the bright, warm and joyful personality, that she was/is. Nancy Penn
Monroe. Her ancestry went back to a Virginia family in the years before
the
American Revolution, living on land granted to them by the King of
England. Her upbringing led her to live the life of a Southern Lady in
its most gracious form: always thinking of others first, always a smile
with her greeting, always refusing to bring hurt to others in any form,
always giving of herself. There never was/is any hate in her for
anyone. In reality, she truly was/is the co-founder of The Monroe
Institute.
Were it not for her, there probably would not have been any such
organization. She participated in all major and minor discussions and
decisions, activities, and even research. Thus her thoughts are
sprinkled through everything, that the Institute
has produced and represents—the programs, the tapes, the public policy,
and certainly the many friends worldwide. We had known each other in a
casual social manner for seven years, and
had been married for twenty-three. Even before we met, Nancy had a
deep interest in the paranormal. She also had been a schoolteacher,
music and piano teacher, an interior decorator, real estate manager,
and was raising four children. She had commenced writing on two books,
one a modern version of Scarlett O'Hara, the other a post-physical
story about "The City Not Made with Hands." Both remain unfinished, in
spite of a waiting typewriter and word processor. She didn't have time.
It is impossible to be at the Institute without encountering the result
of her thoughts. As you enter, the bushes and flowers around the
gatehouse are her selection. The interior design of the building itself
is her adaptation of a plan started by others. As you start up the
hill, the tall row of trees on the right is there because of her idea.
At the Center itself, all of the trees and shrubbery were selected and
placed by her. Inside all three buildings, most of what you see is
Nancy Penn Monroe.
The carpets, the walls, the fixtures, the tables and chairs, the
plates, the silverware, the mugs, even the napkins. In the East Wing of
the Center, the Club Dining Room was/is in its
entirety the latest of her creative efforts. So now the main building
has a new name: The Nancy Penn Center. She was
too self-effacing to permit it before this moment. Where is she now?
To make a very long story very short, when she developed breast cancer,
Nancy accepted the orthodox route for treatment. This meant surgery to
remove the tumor and a number of lymph nodes, chemotherapy, and
radiation. Each slowed up the process but no more.
268
Two nights after her departure, I thought I had cooled down enough to
attempt to visit her. Which I did. The result was an emotional
explosion that included every nuance existing between two humans deeply
in love, all up-front and simultaneous, without the limitations of time
and physical matter. It was a great effort to return, and it took days
to recover.
A second attempt a week later brought the same result. It was simply
too much to handle. Until I learned more, I had to put up a shield that
restricts any kind of nonphysical activity on my part. No more
Interstate pro tem or contacts with friends in that area. Only the
I-There of me. I begin to drift in Nancy's direction even in the
deepest sleep, so the barrier had to include this state too. Thus my
rest is greatly impaired. I now have a new challenge, a massive
adjustment to make. One I hadn't considered. A very new direction. Can
I live in two worlds at the same time? With Nancy in 27, and Here with
our lonely fur family—seven cats and two dogs—in a lonely house?
I don't know.. . . Still, another voice from my I-There insists:
Once the transition is made, only the heavily addicted remain closely
attached to the physical life, they have just departed, according to
your data and others. For most, the resonance/interest/attachment
begins to fade almost immediately, some slowly, some rapidly. But it
does. All of your data show this,
except for the rare "ghost" application. Even with your Big L as
binding as it is. How long will your Silver Queen lady remain in and
around your Focus 27? You don't know and we don't know. Like all of the
others, she is exposed to attractive freedoms you of all humans are
very aware of. But you can't leave here. Not at this time; you have too
many things to complete. Remember your mother and her cello? She taught
you something without even knowing, that she did. And don't forget: at
the very least, you know, that your Silver Queen will be with you at
final departure when we wink out in the thirty-fifth century. What more
do you want!
Glossary
270
Animal Sub-Self
All human communication, inward and out, is filtered and distorted by
the predator and physical survival drives, which I think of as
ASS—Animal Sub-Self—brought about by existence in the Earth Life System.
Aperture
Entry Point into the Beyond, the Source of the Creative Force, that
organized our Physical Universe.
Baseline
The operating level of the mind at any point of growth according to
active Knowns, Unknowns, and Beliefs contained therein.
Basic
In developing a Different Overview, the knowledge and application of
certain Basics are essential. A key Basic, for instance, would be the
knowledge, that you are more than your physical body and that you do
survive physical death.
Such Basics must be absolute Knowns, not just beliefs, to complete the
growth. If one or more of the key Basics is missing, the development is
inhibited.
Belief
A mental-emotional mind-set containing a mixture of Knowns and Unknowns
in various percentiles.
Belief system
A belief that is prevalent in more than one human. The greater the
number holding to a belief, the more powerful the system.
Belief System Territories
Parts of the (M) Field spectrum adjacent to the Earth Life System where
many Human Minds reside after completing physical life experiences.
Each is attracted to a particular segment in accordance with a deep
attachment made during the life just finished to a seemingly powerful
belief.
Beyond
Indefinable in current human thought.
Core Self
The original (M) Field Energy Vortex of each living physical Being.
Different Overview
The gathering of knowledge minus the glitter of beliefs and animal
commands.
Earth Life System
The organized area of Time-Space, that we inhabit.
Emitter
The Opening in the Beyond, through which (M) Field Energy radiates,
that organized and operates our Earth Life System and the Physical
Universe.
EXCOM
The Executive Committee of our I-There (IT) or (Higher Self, LM),
emerging from the many life personalities, that each of us contain.
H Band
The wave of disorganized human thought modulation of (M) Field Energy.
Hemi-Sync
The trade name for an audio wave system developed by The Monroe
Institute over the past thirty years. Listening to these wave systems
on tape helps bring synchronization of electrical brain wave forms
between the two hemispheres of the human brain. Specific sound patterns
help the listener achieve various states of consciousness, that may be
desired.
Hologram
These are commonly products of intersecting light rays, which form a
visible image in an empty area. The theory put forth herein is that (M)
Field Energy may be performing the same process in a far more
sophisticated manner to create Time-Space and our Earth Life System.
Home
Our individual point of Entry into the (Mind) Field and/or Time-Space.
Human Mind
What we are, individually and collectively.
INSPEC
Acronym for Intelligent Species, one presumed greater, than the human
version.
Interstate
A play on a familiar term in the American road system. Here it is used
to indicate a route to follow from one stage of consciousness to
another, both within Time-Space and along the seemingly endless Energy
Spectrum of the (M) Field.
IT
The I-There, that each of us has, containing all previous and present
life personalities (or Higher Self, LM).
Known
What has become an absolute fact to an individual, but not necessarily
to the culture. Generally speaking, it should take at least three or
more verifications to produce a Known. When this testing is completed,
the Known can be added into Overview thinking.
KT-95
Arbitrary label given by the writer to his original Home outside our
solar system.
Last Timer Ring
Located in the outermost area of human influence in the (M) Fields it
is here, that many, who have experienced numerous Earth life sojourns,
retire momentarily. Knowing they have decided to take only one more run
as a human, and with the broad life experience they have in their
possession, each enters a moment of contemplation. Each then decides
what and when that final Earth life will be.
Left brain
Current cultural designation of the intellectual, logical, and rational
segment of our conventional thought processes.
LIFE
In the context used herein rather, than the Webster definition: Layered
Intelligence-Forming Energy.
(M) Field
Nonphysical Energy Field, that permeates Time-Space including our Earth
Life System, but is not a part of current human scientific knowledge or
study.
New direction
This indicated, that the writer-explorer would be active in an entirely
different area, one that was essential, but ignored. The discovery of
the IT (I-There) was the Basic, the penetration to the edge of the
Beyond was the fulfillment, both new and unexpected.
Nonhuman Intelligences
That they do exist is a Known to the writer. How many there are, no one
knows. How many different species there are, no one really knows. Some
apparently are from the same galaxy as we are. Others seem to be from
other Energy Systems and Times. There are even those, that suggest the
possibility, that they once were human. All have certain elements in
common: they know far more about (M) Field Energy, than we do, they
have scarcely any interest in who and what we are, and finally,
communication with them is almost an impossibility, because we don't
understand their methods of doing so.
274
OBE
Acronym for out-of-body experience, where the major portion of
conscious awareness is active outside the limitations of the physical
body.
Phasing
A method of measuring the percentile of the Human Mind directly
involved in physical matter at any point of mental/physical activity.
The purpose is to demonstrate the flickering of our consciousness
between Here and There with very little awareness and control on our
part.
Quick-switch
A faster method of moving human consciousness from one location to
another without Time-Space limitations. Take your consciousness and
stretch it like a rubber band to your destination: then let go of it
where you are and you snap to a new site. This must begin in a state of
consciousness focused away from the physical body, and it does take
practice.
Right brain
That portion of our mind-consciousness, that emanates from our Core
Self, which was present when we began the human experience.
ROTE
Acronym for Related Organized Thought Energy, transmitted from one mind
to another. A mental book or recording, complete with emotional and
sensory patterns.
There
The (M) Field Energy Spectrum in nonphysical form separate from
Time-Space.
Time-space No change in the standard meaning, i.e., our physical
universe. However, it may help to illustrate how very small our domain
is relative to the great mass of energy systems that do not fit this
category.
Unknown That of which nothing is really known: the ultimate in this
category is a phenomenon that has no historical data, and is not
repeated or repeatable. All fear is generated by Unknowns.
Uplink The means by which an information source transmits to a receiver
which either stores or utilizes the data provided. A system in common
practice in our cultural communication network. In this context, it is
the nonconscious and constant transfer of life experience from the
physical organism into the memory bank of our I-There (IT).
Variable As utilized in Ultimate Journey, it is a change that occurs in
an individual life experience that was not planned or necessarily
foreseen. In many cases, such a change may pass unnoticed until the
effects thereof accumulate to massive proportions and force a response.
Immediate and strong Variables that force attention and action might be
labeled by some as glitches, caused by good or bad luck or simply fate.
Examples: reading a book that changes your life; winning a major
lottery; a career change; moving to a different area.
276
The Monroe Institute
The Monroe Institute had its origin in the Research and Development
Division of a family-owned corporation, whose specialty was the
production of radio network programs. In the mid-1950s we had begun
investigating methods of accelerated learning during sleep through the
use of sound patterns. By 1968 we had developed means, by which sound
could be used not only to keep the mind awake and concentrating, but
also to induce sleep. Then a discovery in that year changed the entire
direction of investigation: that certain patterns of sound will induce
distinct states of consciousness not ordinarily available to the human
mind.
In 1971 The Monroe Institute was created out of the R & d
Division to supplement the research effort. In 1976 the Esalen
organization invited the Institute to run a workshop demonstrating its
methodology at Big Sur, California. Other workshops followed, and an
Educational Division was created to develop and administer learning
programs. In 1979 the Institute moved to its present premises in the
foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains, Virginia. Here a residential
center (now known as the Nancy Penn Center), research laboratory,
lecture hall, and seminar rooms were designed specifi- cally
to enhance the unique learning process that had been developed. Each
participant is assigned a private and personal CHEC unit (Controlled
Holistic Environmental Chamber) where the actual learning process takes
place. By 1993 over seven thousand people had experienced the evolving
program, known as the Gateway Voyage. Programs and workshops are also
organized at locations throughout the United States and in other
countries around the world. In-home study courses are also available,
using training manuals and albums of audiotapes and compact discs.
The Gateway Voyage
This six-day program is a step-by-step absorption of phase-shifting
methods related to human consciousness. The purpose is, in the first
instance, to help the participant release inherent fears through
exploration of self and environment by converting Unknowns into Knowns.
Once this is achieved, the student is free to evoke controlled phase
shifts into other states of consciousness among other nonphysical
energy systems.
For the sake of convenience and mutual understanding, the term "Focus"
with an appropriate number is used to denote the different stages or
states of consciousness that participants move into during the learning
process. These stages are defined as follows:
Focus 10. The first step in separation of human mind-consciousness from
physical matter reality. A simplistic definition is "mind awake and
alert, body asleep." The mind is slightly out-of-phase with normal
physical wakefulness. It is a stage where all five physical senses 278
Ultimate Journey seem detuned or reduced in strength and is the
beginning of objective perception in (M) Field energy.
Perhaps the first major discovery in Focus 10 is that human
mind-consciousness can operate, think, reason, "feel" without the
strong physical sensory input signals previously deemed necessary.
Hence a new kind of freedom is born. The key implication is that one is
indeed "more" than the physical body, that one can exist with or
without it.
Focus 12. This may be loosely identified as a state of expanded
awareness. Induced by additional sound patterns, Focus 12 is a phase
state with still less attention to the physical body and more movement
into (M) Field energy. With the continued lessening of physical sensory
input, perception of (M) Field patterns becomes progressively clearer.
It is not unfamiliar territory. In physical waking consciousness,
the overwhelming sensory input from the physical body covers over most,
if not all, of such perception. The only penetration usually occurs
during sleep or other states where human physical consciousness has
been abandoned. The difference in Focus 12 lies in the fact that
physical consciousness remains active and alert, under your own
control. In early exploration, colors, shapes, mental pictures both
still and moving may appear—the stuff that dreams are made of. As the
mind takes charge and begins to learn the (M) Field language, as it
were, an entirely new vista is opened, waiting to be experienced and
assessed. Unknowns become Knowns at a rapid rate in this new context.
279
Focus 15. This marks another step in the phase relationship, with a
smaller percentage of attention in physical matter and more in the (M)
Field. The concept, or illusion, of time is dropped from the pattern;
thus Focus 15 may be identified as a state of "no time."
Focus 21. This state is the equivalent of deep (delta) sleep in
ordinary physical life activity. However, the mind is fully "awake" and
conscious, directing the action. Focus 21 seems to be the maximum range
of comfortable phase relationship between time-space and (M) Field
participation, the "edge" as it were.
From Focus 21 it may be possible to verify individually at a personal
level the contents and concepts included in this volume.
* * *
Special programs for Gateway graduates only are held at the Institute
Center. These consist principally of additional training in mind phase
shifting, in order to explore more deeply both the personal self and
the far reaches of other reality systems.
Guidelines A week-long intensive course where the exploration of self
is the major thrust. It is a turning inward to meet, know, and
understand the relationship between the conscious I and the Core Self
(the "Inner Self Helper"), and the many personalities that compose the
single individual. Learning exercises are included for controlled
out-ofbody work and self-healing.
280
Lifeline
See Chapter 18.
Exploration 27
For graduates of Lifeline, Exploration 27 offers a systematic series of
planned visits to Focus 27 in order to obtain information, data,
and direct experience beyond what is explored in the Lifeline program.
Participants also learn to access new states of consciousness (Focus
34/35), identified as the area of the "Gathering" in Monroe's Far
Journeys.
Heartline The goal of this newest residential program is to provide
opportunities for participants to open to the greatest energy of all,
Universal Love. Principles are introduced which are directed toward
expediting the growth and empowerment of participants whose conscious
intent is to know, and to express, the full potential of love as a
richly integrated part of their daily lives.
The Timeout Project Timeout is a major expansion of human purpose into
that area of life activity which consumes one third of our existence,
about which little is known and of which little use, apart from the
obvious, is made. This area is sleep, the periods when we take "time
out" from the physical world.
The Project is a pioneering attempt to deal with the following factors:
281
to develop conscious control of the sleep state, so that one is able to
"go" to sleep when and if desired and to awaken or stay awake as the
need arises;
to make useful and practical application of the sleep state not only as
physical and mental regeneration but as a period of profound and
intensive learning;
to gather knowledge and understanding of the sleep state using a
different base from the present historical perspective.
The thrust of the Project is aimed at the broad market of sleep needs
worldwide. First and foremost is to provide a noninvasive,
nondrug method of getting into restful sleep. Currently it appears that
roughly 30 percent of the world population suffer with sleep
dysfunction in one form or another. In the United States alone, it is
estimated that over 30,000,000 persons use prescription medication in
order to get to sleep, and nearly as many again use over-thecounter
drugs from time to time.
The Project does not attempt to replace services offered by sleep
disorder clinics and does not deal with sleep problems due to various
psychological dysfunctions. However, it is designed to assist in cases
where psychological factors disturb the sleep process. It is a learning
system rather than a method of treatment.
Timeout sleep exercises on audiotape and compact disc not only teach
the listener to get to sleep easily and quickly, but also to use the
sleep period as a period of learning and therapeutics.
282
Progressive
Accelerated Learning
This is a set of exercises in audiocassette and compact disc form
applying the Hemi-Sync process to improve memory, concentration, and
mental data processing, increase wakefulness, and assist relaxation.
Surgical Support Series This set of exercises is designed for use
during surgery, serious physical injury, or illness. Cassettes and CDs
are provided for use by the patient prior to surgery, in the operating
room, and during recovery and recuperation. Recorded results with well
over two hundred patients indicate a marked reduction in fear and
anxiety, a reduced requirement of anesthesia, minimal pain during
recovery, and up to 50 percent less recuperative time. Positive
Immunity Program A series of exercises that teach methods for accessing
inner resources in order to strengthen the immune system; developing
the ability to relax, sleep deeply, and direct energy for balancing and
healing; creating strong mental support for the accomplishment of
physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual goals.
Opening the Way (Support for Pregnancy and Childbirth)
This series provides a dynamic set of "tools" with which to enter the
miracle of childbirth. Through these exercises an understanding of
one's vast creative potential leads to the ability to face
pregnancy and birth with confidence and serenity. Support for
beginning stages of pregnancy through labor and breast-feeding.
On Becoming a Lifelong Learner Designed to be listened to at bedtime,
these exercises help to develop one's lifetime learning skills through
teaching how to continuously re-create one's self-concept; redefine
stress and find joy in every day; develop the skills, attitudes, and
habits of a lifelong learner; use gratitude to enhance and increase the
positive aspects in one's life.
284
Research Papers and Reports The Monroe Institute's Hemi-Sync process.
F. Holmes Atwater.
The theoretical, physiological effects of Hemi-Sync on humans.
Effects of rest and hemispheric synchronization compared to effects of
rest and guided imagery on the enhancement of creativity in
problem-solving. Deborah Ann Baker, Ph.D.
Hemi-Sync in conjunction with flotation to find avenues to enhance
creativity in problem-solving.
Use of Monroe Hemi-Sync relaxation tapes to decelerate maladaptive
behavior. Ronald W. Brill, Ph.D., and G. Rex
Walker, Ph.D.
Effects of Hemi-Sync in treatment of patients with selfinjurious
behavior.
Hemi-Sync and musical interval identification. Gregory D.
Carroll, Ph.D.
285
Going
Home Series
Throughout human history, there has been a common yearning and
nostalgia for something deep in ourselves—our true identity, our
origin. Our busy, practical minds, appropriately focused upon
accomplishing things in this life, have trouble with this yearning. It
seems irrational and emotional, so many of us interpret it as a desire
to revisit the site of our physical origin, our birthplace and
childhood. Of those who do, many come away unsatisfied and unfulfilled.
They expected more but cannot define what they mean by "more." Some
begin a search for an answer, not realizing they are already searching
as they become astronomers, researchers, space shuttle pilots,
microbiologists, psychologists, ministers, therapists, philosophers, to
name the obvious. Then there are all of us ordinary people who
sometimes pause for a moment to reflect about what it all means. But
just for a moment. A growing number of us finally become astute enough
to realize one way or another that each of us will eventually be "going
home." To our original point of origin, not Here but There. It's only a
matter of time. Thus we begin and continue to identify with an
exploratory, seeking attitude. Going Home is a series of audio learning
exercises on cassette tape or compact disc (CD), designed for use in a
place of residence, in hospitals, hospices, and nursing care
facilities. The Project has designed a special kind of help for those
with life-threatening illness or injury and for their family and loved
ones. This set of recorded learning exercises offers a means whereby
the individual can reduce dramatically the common fear of physical
death. The result can be, at the least, greater tolerance of the
situation, including awareness that humans are indeed more than their
physical bodies. At most, the Going Home user may learn to control
willfully and calmly the sequence of physical death. Concurrently,
Going Home also helps family and friends understand and accept the
physical death process so as to provide badly needed specific support
at critical moments. It also includes methods that can be employed to
help family and friends as they adjust to and recover from the loss of
their loved one. Going Home takes the following positions. The
Principal identifies one who is in the last and incontrovertible stages
of a terminal illness or injury. Family and Friends identify those who
are in close loving and loved contact with the Principal. The Primary
Purpose is to provide the Principal with an interesting prospect of
valuable knowledge achieved through direct experience, rather than a
dull and distasteful event.
Related Secondary Purposes:
A. To release the Principal from the fear of physical death.
This is achieved by developing the knowledge that one is more than the
physical body, and one does survive physical death . . .
300
B. To help the Principal release emotions, guilts, and obligations,
that
are no longer needed and bind one to the present physical life
experience.
C. To help the Principal recognize and remember some of the
possibilities subsequent to this present physical life experience.
D. To provide the Principal an opportunity to exercise calmly and
rationally the option to depart this physical existence when one so
desires.
E. To instill in the Principal the knowledge that after the physical
death transition, it is possible to send messages and signals to Family
and Friends, if so desired.
F. To provide Family and Friends of the Principal with enough exposure
to Going Home learning exercises so as to assure their understanding,
encouragement, and support to the Principal engaged in the process.
Going Home is based upon the success of the Lifeline Program,
which has demonstrated the practicality of the process. The difference
is that Going Home is for individual use at any location.
"Human
Mind Radiation
74
The
Outermost Layer, much larger, than you might expect, is composed of
Others' Thoughts of you. Consider yourself as existing wherever and
whenever any other person or Being thinks of you, even only
occasionally. You may get some idea of the magnitude by recalling all
of those you think of, even only occasionally. Add (as just a belief at
this point) all of those, who still think of you, but who no longer
inhabit a physical body—who are now "somewhere else"—plus those, who
know you from any other existence, whatever and wherever it may be or
have been. You would be astounded at how Big and how Much You are. Very
little of this Radiation of You, as perceived by others, is aware of
the content of your Inner Core Self. The disguise and filtration are in
the way. But a problem does lie in our deep concern as to what others
think of Us."
".
. . Even closed tightly, the Radiation was so strong, that it was
nearly unbearable . . . I felt as if sweat were pouring off me, I was
melting . . . but it wasn't heat . . . and I began to heave with great
racking sobs and I couldn't understand why ...then the Radiation eased,
and I opened a little. There was a Form between me and the Radiation,
shielding me, and I could perceive a Corona Effect all around the Form
from the Radiation Beyond (the
Source of All Suns, LM).
It
reminded me deeply of religious paintings I had seen, only this was
live and in something far different from pigmented color . . .
(Inspec
friend - This is as close, as you can tolerate. We are diverting most
of the effective Energy patterns, which are in themselves only the
random residue, the Leakage as you might call it, from the fundamental.
Focus through us rather, than the Outer Rim. It will help.)
With
great difficulty, I narrowed and held on the center of the Form . . .
and I began to cool and calm down . . . slowly my rational and
observing self began to emerge again, dominating the overwhelming
emotional surge, that had enveloped me . . . it was as if I perceived
through a darkly tinted window and I had to work continually to keep
the emotion below the threshold level, the wondrous and brilliant joy,
awe, reverence, melded into one yet with flashes of each sparking
momentarily . . . all coursing through me as I responded to the
Radiation, unable to prevent it and barely keeping it under control.
This would most emphatically be the ultimate heaven, the final Home . .
.
(Inspec friend - Observe more carefully. You are capable of doing so.)
I
looked through the smoked-glass shield, that was my INSPEC friend . . .
and I was grateful, for I knew, if I responded to this degree from just
the reflection, the Leakage - the full force of the Radiation would
have shattered me, I was not ready for it, if this was the percept from
the distant Edge. There, in the long view, was a radiant living Form of
incredible size, my first percept, that of a tall standing Humanoid,
arms outstretched in front, palms upward . . . but just as quickly, it
was not . . . instead, a Shining White Globe, edges indistinct, behind
it another one, identical in appearance, behind it another one, a
continuous cascade moving away into Infinity, beyond my percept ability
. . .
From each came numberless Beams or Rays, some huge in their
diameter, others no wider, than a pinpoint, all uniform in size
throughout their length and beyond my percept as to their destination,
some of them moving past me so close that I felt I could reach out and
touch one . . .
(Inspec friend - Would you like to do so? We will help you if needed.)
I
hesitated, then with the warm assurance from the shielding INSPEC Form,
I stretched a part of me out, cautiously, and touched the smallest Ray
nearest me . . .
in an instant, the shock spread throughout all what
I thought I was, and I knew, and in knowing, knew, that I would forget
if I tried to remember, because what I was could not yet handle the
reality of it . . .
yet I never again would be the same even without
remembering, except, that it occurred and the indescribable joy of
Knowing only, that it did take place and the echoes would reverberate
in me throughout Eternity, whatever my Eternity was . . . gently, I
felt myself being detached from the Ray, and I collapsed behind the
shielding form of my INSPEC friend. . . . Friend? INSPEC? I realized
then how provincial my percepts were.
I also realized how limited they were . . .the Radiating Globes, the
Rays emitted . . .
(Inspec
friend - You responded very well for the initial exposure. Your human
Loosh/Love energy is transmuted into the center of what you perceive.
From there it is redirected into what you call the Rays, to the points,
where it is needed most. When you have progressed, we can guide you to
one of the destinations so you can observe the results.)
My percept
was not strong enough to bring any flicker whatsoever as to what
exposure to the full force of such Rays might be. But my human
curiosity wouldn't let the basic question go unanswered, now, that I
had smoothed somewhat.
(Inspec friend - It was created. It was always there, we have no
percept of a Beginning. Are you ready to return now?)
I turned inward and closed tightly..."
This
book "Ultimate Journey" may
also be downloaded from this site (Printing, Content Copying and Page
Extraction are allowed on this website) :
http://dmt-nexus.com/Files/Books/General/Ultimate_Journey-Robert%20A%20Monroe.pdf
